Clutch My Pearls

Come with The Girls to a wedding and yell “I Object!” This week Barbara is presenting “The Wedding Crasher” by Mia Sosa. In this millennial rom-com of a book, follow Dean and Solange as they fake date their way into love. In this book we go axe throwing, fake screw driving to Pony by Ginuwine, watch a sex show, and even help with a birth! Could this be considered the sequel to The Wedding Planner...

Head to the Southwest Omegaverse with The Girls! This week Barbara is presenting a HOT OFF THE PRESSES book, “Bride” by Ali Hazelwood! The girls barely cover everything that happens in the book, but it has them all KNOTTED up. When vampire Misery Lark is sent to marry Lowe Moreland to keep the peace between species, things get Baja blasted! Close the blackout curtains, take a hot bath, and avoid e...

Come along with The Girls and VIVA LAS VEGAS! This week Vanessa is presenting “Knot So Lucky” by Trilina Pucci! What happens in Vegas doesn’t always stay in Vegas, except when a judge makes you stay! This book follows busy business esthetician Elle and the hot shot NFL quarterback Crew Matthews after a night of partying..and their wedding!? Even though Elle and Crew want to get a divorce, they mak...

Put on your wide shoes and come to a hockey game with The Girls! This week Vanessa is presenting one of her favorite books, “Pucking Around” by Emily Rath. In this ‘why choose hockey romance’ we meet Rachel who is not like the other girls, and the newest physical therapist for a hockey team of hotties! When Rachel starts a relationship with Caleb, Jake, AND Ilmari everyone gets to experience new t...

Come burn down a gas station with The Girls! This week Barbara is presenting “Sweetest Oblivion” by Danielle Lori from the Made series! When hot mob boss Nicolas is set to marry sweet Elena’s younger sister, things don’t go quite as planned. Nicolas only wants to smoke cigs and make his haters to choose whether they keep their left or right hand. Come sit on a kitchen counter and get your ponytail...

Come to parents weekend with The Girls! This week Barbara is presenting Mistakes Were Made by Meryl Wilsner! When cool girl Cassie meets a hot female doctor at a bar they have a hot and heavy one night stand, until the next morning when Cassie realizes the hot doc is actually her friends mom! This episode is steamy and has everything women want! Higher education! Brunch! Bathroom makeouts! Halter...

You’re invited to come to the 80s with The Girls! This week Vanessa is presenting “Maneater” by Emily Antionette. The book follows Shane, who is a virgin-witch-nerd and Elle, who is a mega-babe-succubus! Shane isn’t like the other boys, he’s a good boy and when he saves Elle (after a lot of asking for consent!) from some sketchy witches she makes him come in his pants! Which is a pretty big compli...

Grab your AirPods and cross The River Styx with The Girls! This week Barbara is presenting a listener’s recommendation of “Neon Gods” by Katee Roberts. When Zeus announces he is engaged to Persephone (news to her!) she runs away to Hades in the Underworld. This book is set in a modern day Olympus, which is basically Gotham City… so does that make Hades The Penguin? This episode is carrying on the...

Get a suntan, read a book, and kiss under the moonlight with The Girls! This week Vanessa is presenting “Twisted Games” by Ana Huang. When stoic bodyguard Rhys Larson is assigned to Princess Bridget Von Ascheberg, he realizes she is not like the other girls. Rhys doesn’t break the rules, but Bridget has a bucket list and love is risky! The Girls are all over the place this week and eventually get...

Take a guilt trip home for the holidays with The Girls! This week Vanessa is presenting “Mistletoe Bet” by Maren Moore. When busy business woman Quinn comes home for Christmas and runs into festive small town doctor Parker, the grumpy sunshine dynamic sets in. Even Barbara is clutching her pearls this week! Can Parker get Quinn to fall for Christmas, and for him? Is it pee? Is this the first assau...

Put on your comfy pants and buy a Christmas Tree farm with The Girls! This week Barbara is presenting Lovelight Farms by B.K. Borison. This friends to lovers book has the girls getting all heated and it’s not because of the hot coco! When Stella enters an Instagram contest to save her tree farm, she persuades her NYC bff Luka (ayeee) to pretend to be in love with her but…shocker…he already is! Unh...

Write a letter with The Girls and throw it in the fire to summon Santa..err Satan. This week Barbara is presenting our first repeat author episode with Satan: A Christmas Monster Romance by Layla Fae. In this book, Daisy has a horrible sister, neglectful family and dyslexia! Daisy’s dyslexia gets her into a fiery situation with the devil himself. This episode will have you questioning whether or n...

Fire up the group chat, get drunk, dye your hair blonde, and go on a mission with The Girls to destroy your ex! This week, Vanessa is presenting “Tis the Season for Revenge” by Morgan Elizabeth! When Abigail gets dumped by her lawyer boyfriend she realizes the only way to get even is to get under his boss Damien! This book is cute, fluffy and dirty! This book will get you into the winter holiday s...

Join The Girls as they get whisked away by lizard people in the night! This week we have our first alien smut from Vanessa with “Choosing Theo” by Victoria Aveline. Jade is taken to a distant planet where it’s the law to choose a husband. Thankfully for Jade, Theo graduated with honors from Husband School! This book has everything! There’s pointy ears, darkening eyes, tattoos and FORTY g...

Come join The Girls for a double serving Thanksgiving-themed episode! Just like the holidays, this is a very chaotic experience. You won’t be the same after today! Our first dish comes from Barbara and it is Stuffed by The Were-Turkey by Tate McKirk. In this 13-page erotica there isn’t a lot of pearls being clutched, but we are holding back a gag! Josette is a vegan who rescues a turkey and keeps...

Grab your coworkers and head down to HR with The Girls as they discuss The Hating Game by Sally Thorne! This weeks episode is a coworker enemies to lovers book presented by Barbara to Emily and Vanessa! This book is such a slice of 2016 - including unrealistic work promotions, manic pixie dream girls named Lucinda, and a guy named Joshua who is basically a floor lamp! Is this book even smut? Does...

You’re invited to join The Girls at the wedding of Ada and Callum! This week Vanessa is presenting the mafia romance “Brutal Prince” by Sophie Lark. One family is Italian, one family is Irish, and they are all rivals! Will the wedding end this long feud or will there be a funeral? The girls discuss whether or not Ada actually set the fire (…she did) or is that just her being 20 years old? If you h...

Gather 'round all you Ghouls and Girlies and ride your broomstick with The Girls as they discuss Hollows Grove by Lee Jacquot! This week's episode is a Halloween novella presented by Barbara and Vanessa. This book centers around Evelyn and her best-friend's brother Dorian. There is a lot to route through this week, especially since Dorian is a man who can really accomplish a lot in 15 minutes...

Join the girls as they collapse into the arms of a forbidden love with The Darkest Temptation by Danielle Lori! This weeks episode is a toxic, dark romance, mafia trope presented by Barbara to Vanessa and Emily. This book has everything! Family drama! Kidnapping! Deranged love! Kittens! Dog kennels! The Opera! What's "the knee thing" and have you ever experienced it? Sneak away with the girls as t...

Come fly with the girls on their first hockey romance as they explore the book Mile High by Liz Tomforde. This weeks episode is a joint presentation from Vanessa and Barbara to Emily. Find out about the first cumming! How many rings are too many? Is it really possible to be in the mood after a deep dish pizza? And as always, our favorite one-star reviews! Pack your bags, and bring your emotional b...