Patrick
Chronically Unqualified
A guy gives advice on things he knows nothing about.
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Episodes
Microwave Blues 09.03.2026 15:39
If you leave 5 seconds on the microwave, your bank redlines your property. Song of the week: Wild Coyote by The Nude Party
The Weight Of A Rock Fight 02.03.2026 15:24
Always failing leads to dynamite up the ass. Song of the week: You Think I Ain't Worth A Dollar, But I Feel Like A Millionare by Queens of the Stone Age Movie of the week: The Other Guys
Hold The Door 22.02.2026 15:43
Air fresheners. Couples. Piles of leaves. Song of the week: I Will Always Love You by Whitney Houston
Piss Monkey 09.02.2026 15:00
Patrick makes mixtapes and pisses. Song of the week: Twistin' the Night Away
Air Freshener Angel 01.02.2026 16:02
Patrick doesn’t idolize people and then time travels to visit the people he idolizes. Song of the week: One of These Days by Pink Floyd Movie of the week: No Time to Die
7 Bongs, 1 Storage Unit 26.01.2026 15:16
Patrick dabbles in storage auctions and teaches to forgive without forgetting. Song of the week: Because I'm Me by The Avalanches Movie of the week: Gidget
Control Nothing, Accept Everything 19.01.2026 15:34
Patrick is sick and has no control over it. Song of the week: I’m with You by Avril Lavigne Movie of the week: The Book Of Eli
VHS Are Back Baby! 12.01.2026 16:10
Patrick found a new way to waste his money! Song of the week: Your Sins Will Find You Out by Eli "Paperboy" Reed Movie of the week: Face/Off
Drumming > Martyrdom 05.01.2026 14:59
Patrick figures out his New Years resolution and why you shouldn't be a martyr for love. Song of the week: Leaving on a Jet Plane by Peter, Paul and Mary Movie of the week: Back to the Future
The True Meaning Of Christmas 29.12.2025 17:44
Patrick ruins Christmas. Song of the week: No Lighter by Strawberry Fuzz
Chaos and Vegans 24.12.2025 14:29
Patrick finds out that the chaos of the universe causes vegans to run BBQ restaurants. Favorite Christmas album: A Christmas Gift For You From Phil Spector Book of the week: Slaughter House V by Kurt Vonnegut
Pilot Episode 22.12.2025 18:21
The pilot that flew this podcast into the ground.
I'm Twinkle Toes! 18.12.2025 15:13
Patrick proves his childhood bullies right and tells you why you're a slave to consumerism. Movie of the week: Bullet Train (starring Brad Pitt)
Funniest Episode Ever! 15.12.2025 15:37
Patrick has a blast from the past! Song of the week: Mermaid Pterodactyl by Playboy Manbaby
Take Notes: Pegging = Dinner 08.12.2025 16:01
Patrick figures out who's cooking dinner and why lightning would strike a rock instead of a tree. Song of the week: Bright Eyes by Art Garfunkel
Windows Don't Exist At Rock Bottom 02.12.2025 29:10
Patrick trauma dumps and then figures out what would happen if windows didn't exist.
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