Christmas Archives -

GOODBYE JUNE MOVIE REVIEW Kelly Barnhill once wrote “Death is always sudden, even when it isn’t”. Though all of us will eventually choose to go quietly into that good night or fight against the dying of the light, death will come for all of us, and for some of us that meeting with the Grim […]

OH. WHAT. FUN. MOVIE REVIEW One Christmas you’re bound in a homemade leather suit decapitating mannequins while eluding the detective skills of a millionaire with daddy issues while awakening your independence and empowering an audience of all ages to do the same in the face of an uncaring apathetic world. Meow! Then three decades later, […]

JINGLE BELL HEIST MOVIE REVIEW Nice Christmas tree you got there with all that silver and gold on it. Be a shame if something happened to it. Jingle Bell Heist follows Sophia (Olivia Holt) who is all dressed up in red and green, and making cash at the Christmas department store adorned with Christmas trees […]

RED ONE MOVIE REVIEW The influx of Xmas movies has begun. With a big cast and with director Jake Kasdan (The Jumanji movies) at the helm, Red One inserts a Marvel movie feel to the proceedings. Dwayne Johnson is Callum Drift, a top agent at E.L.F. who protects Santa Claus (J.K. Simmons) and other mythological […]

MERRY LITTLE BATMAN MOVIE REVIEW Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Batdad! Happy Belated Holidays. If you’re not quite hungover from all the parties, annoying family members, and binge eating… you may want to check out Merry Little Batman streaming on Prime. It’s a mashup of everything you love about the Batman universe […]

SILENT NIGHT MOVIE REVIEW It’s hard to believe but it’s been 20 years since Hong Kong action maestro John Woo directed a Hollywood film. While Woo retains his taste for melodrama, his latest bullet ballet trades in his usual operatic flair for a grittier, more grounded approach to violence. Shot in Mexico City on a […]

TRASH IN THE CAN: RICH LITTLE’S A CHRISTMAS CAROL Celebrate the holiday season with a star-studded holiday special that could only afford one star! Baylor Johnson returns for a retelling of A Christmas Carol as only a borderline talented Canadian impressionist can deliver. Come for Liza Minnelli having a seizure and stay for the Kennedy […]

A CHRISTMAS STORY CHRISTMAS MOVIE REVIEW It is really hard to live up to what has been dubbed by society as a “classic.” Especially when the original has been on a constant loop, every Christmas Day, on Ted Turner’s Broadcast Station. I know I know… what’s a broadcast station (traditional television) and who the fuck […]

SPIRITED MOVIE REVIEW Every now and then, and not often mind you, someone makes a new Christmas movie that isn’t just a checklist of tropes and cliches. Once in a great while, someone actually creates a unique and worthwhile Christmas movie that dares to be worthy of an annual rewatch alongside the Muppets, Elf, and Die […]

VIOLENT NIGHT MOVIE REVIEW What’s a holiday season without a little violent Christmas mayhem? In a bit of inspired casting, David Harbour takes on the role of (actual) Santa Claus in this brutal action comedy from the director of the Dead Snow films. It’s Christmas Eve and Santa is drunk, tired, and kinda about to […]