Can We Steal You for a Second?

When you cast a horny lead…you get CHAOS!!!! To say we are Team Clayton or Team Susie is far too simplistic… Susie shouldn’t test Clayton and clearly wanted an out for a convincing Bachelorette edit. Clayton can consensually sleep with and be in love with all of the women but they are allowed to feel a type of way about it, and that way might be seeing him as an ass who lashed out and made mistake...

HOMETOWNS BABY! Susie has so much to offer except showcasing her personality, Gabby is a genuine, lovable, dingbat with a 10/10 grandpa, Serene handles rejection realistically and entertainingly, and Rachel’s whispering reaches new scratchy levels. We have a brief tangent about Love Is Blind (because of course) and in the process create a new simplified binary: sweaty guys vs. dirty guys (you’ll h...

Whitney is traveling this week so Camille is joined with a guest, her friend Lee! They bring with them top-tier takes, fun debates, and an extreme distaste for the pretty women date (same). Team Sarah or Team Mara/House? Predictions for the end of the season? Love Is Blind Season 2 Discussion? We’ve got it all here.  Instacart Referral Link - https://instacart.oloiyb.net/c/3017650/1140284/7412 Buz...

As Shanae exits into the Niagra Falls mist…another villain appears from the wreckage just as Bachelor lore intends it: Mara. We’re with her on older women being consistently overlooked in this franchise…but sometimes you have to read to room to see that He’s Just Not That Into You. We also engage in an impromptu conversation about what the intersections between the future of the show, social media...

Gabby is absolutely bringing the adorable, lovable, goofy, wacky energy we all needed. Marlena is bringing top-tier roasts, fits, and one-liners. Genevieve and Shanae on the other hand…Genevieve you should have expected this outcome with your drama involvement. Shanae you are a master manipulator who has had a great reign as a delusional, lying, proud villain but now we need to see new villains ri...

We are BLESSED to be joined this episode by the one and only Sophie James from @unpaidemotionallabor. She is laugh-out-loud hilarious, impressively quick-witted, and oh-so intelligent and talented. Our conversation meanders through the episode and touches on everything from Rachel’s sex-kitten facade, Shrimp-nae’s racial microaggressions, Marlena’s beyond-impressive track statistics, Sierra’s astr...

The duality of the Bachelor producers: emotional conversations about body issues and BAYWATCH SEXY RUNNING BABY! This podcast episode is just the same. Some laughs over Shrimpgate (Whitney and Camille agree that it’s worth making a few enemies for garlic butter shrimp) and some deeper conversations about body insecurities and group female vulnerability bonding. We are just two of the gals gabbing...

Realizations this episode: Cassidy read to many Cosmo articles growing up. Shanae is insecure and jealous of Cassidy accomplishing what she couldn’t. Clayton is trying to squeeze his super-sized muscles into the clothes they bought for a different Bachelor. And every Bachelor lead falls distinctly into the category of beach guy or lake guy. Ben H, Chris Soules, Jason Mesnick, lake guys. Matt James...

It’s a generational clash out here on night one and us cuspers can tell you with just one glance who is over 25. But no matter what, Clayton is about to be DOMINATED by these women and we are excited for a chaos-filled season. Tune in as we jump around and discuss all the big names of the evening and our general takeaways from the bunch. If you’re new to the podcast, please let us know what you th...

We are so happy for Nayte and Michelle! Both absolutely beaming at ATFR, upcoming moving plans, and a $200k downpayment for a house already. Prove us wrong!!!! As we always say, couples with a chip on their shoulders do better so we are glad for this outcome. It’s definitely giving “can’t live without each other Big and Carrie energy" though. And Michelle…your proposal speech sounded straight...

The best episode of the year is here! It kept us in suspense until the end when it confirmed what we thought all along. These dang editors keep fooling us! Hot takes: does Michelle really want what she says she wants? Does she want security, safety, reciprocation, and adoration? Or does she want drama, the chase, spicy chemistry, and lust? Another hot take: Brandon is her middle school crush, Joe...

Are we living through a fever dream, or was that just the wildest, weirdest Men Tell All ever? They REALLY included: tea about sister DM slides, sentences bleeped out into non-recognition, defamation lawsuits being served, Tayshia break-up conversation, explosive finale previews, Clayton's season teasers, and like five villain confrontations? We are blessed today Bachelor Nation! We also disc...

I know we weren’t the only ones doing double takes at these hometowns. Michelle has four very nice men. Two who she admittedly “never has to worry about how they feel” but she will inevitably pick the one who seems the most uncertain…Nayte. We’ve seen this film before and we didn’t like the ending. But it was fun as always to see where all these guys get their odd quirks from! Hometowns baby! Inst...

We simply HAD to start our episode with a lengthy discussion on all of the messy messy messy Bachelor Nation news: Zayshia breakup, Hannah’s book, and 12 days of messi-(disregard for other’s feelings)-ness. We are also joined by Whitney’s roommate and friend of the pod Denise to debate our controversial Katie and Taylor Swift comparison. Civil discourse is had! Then we dive into a discussion of th...

HUGE week for the show: NATIONAL travel to a mid-sized American city, MODERATELY filled stadiums, and a head-to-head 1:1 match-up between the two likely FINALISTS?! Are you team Joe or Nayte? Personally, we are team Rodney or Brandon but feeling Joe a bit more with this match-up. Listen in to hear the reasoning. Plus, stay tuned until the end for a raucous Bachelor Nation News with some controvers...

*Please note the background noise will stop around 10 minutes in! We had some prediction flops (Martin Train was maybe not the best investment) but our red flags about Nayte getting a little too involved in drama and having a bit of an ego with Michelle may have come to fruition. It’s clear that Michelle is too good for ALL of them, but we are liking the effort seen from Olu, Rodney, Joe, Brandon,...

Chugga chugga CHOO CHOO Rodney/Brandon J/Chris G/Martin/Leroy trains are leaving the station! You may want to look for a transfer to one of these trains soon if you are on the Nayte or Joe train…but that’s a hot take we hope doesn’t come to fruition. Another unpopular opinion is that we are happy that Michelle is saved from walking red flags Peter and Jamie but…we wished their villain potential co...

Was this a perfect Bachelorette episode? It had everything: stupid funny drama, intriguing snakey drama, budding love stories, talented child actors, sportzball, and stunning fashion. Overall, it seems like a lot of Michelle’s feelings/reactions about Joe can be chalked up to a childhood crush she’s had on him…Mr. 2011 Minnesota Basketball Man. It’s still Nayte’s to lose though. Stay tuned to the...

MICHELLE IS THE BACHELORETTE! Listen to our latest episode to hear our thoughts on some of her top men. Common denominator is a Grind  Never  Stops  Attitude. Michelle is self-assured and confident in her decisions, Nayte is a next-level frontrunner, everyone is tall, and this resort is tacky. We disagree with some of her send homes but trust the process. Stay tuned until the end to hear Camille’s...

The dawn of Michelle’s Bachelorette season is upon us…and in order to pregame for it we had to dive into cast bios! This time, we decided to just look at their photo and name to guess what kind of person they were in high school. Did they have Troy Bolton loves-the-arts-dad-pressure-basketball syndrome? Did they wear a white tux to prom? Were they a pole-vaulter? Tune in to hear our snap judgement...

In the world’s longest episode, three couples get engaged and a bunch more decide they’d rather break up than face an awkward conversation about not wanting to get engaged after two days. Overall we are excited about these final three couples! Doesn’t mean we don’t analyze their predicted likelihood…but all the best to them! Plus, we dig into the juicy Bachelor Nation News of Abiclade, confirming...

Whitney called it from the beginning…Ivan is a snakey-snake. But Aaron is a sensitive little angry boy who would find a reason to beef with a blade of grass, but in this case he’s kind of right. Tune in this week to see the culmination of this hot take and more including: Noah pulled a more empathetic Greg, Kenny is showing his fboy tendencies, Abigail is a terrible communicator who didn’t want to...

The storm has been abrewin’ for weeks and we must URGENTLY EVACUATE FROM PARADISE IMMEDIATELY! Only to return mere moments later with nothing but a fallen palm branch of destruction. I can’t believe we watch this dumb show. Other than the minor tropical storm, the couples have been vibing almost boringly so, issuing consistent and predictable “I’m falling in love with you” proclamations. Plus, mak...

Grocery Store Joe & the Anti-Clout Mob of as (Brendan kindly puts it) “disgruntled females” found another target this week. Tammy experiences her worst birthday ever (apparently Covid is a breeze!). Joe and Serena are falling in love while Kendall seethes in the background. Tia is publicly turned on by obvious DM slider Blake Monar’s tattoos. Riley and Maurissa continue to explore each others...

The Anti-Clout Mob needed a scapegoat against fame-hungry schemers, and the Tight Ass Party provided Chris + Alana. However, the real bandits (Pieper +  Brendan) are still somehow getting away with the biggest crime on the beach (Justice for Natasha). We start the episode with a fascinating analysis about lucrative reality TV fame, producer machinations, and even a theory that this all an effort t...