Can I Lay Down

"How do I get people to shut up while I'm in the afterglow of an orgasm?" "I've been kidnapped and starved in a closet by a lesbian power couple." "My friend broke her arm and I couldn't stop laughing." I don't know what this episode is about other than whatever is generally wrong with us. Special guest Micha is here to answer our shame-based therapeutic questions and have all her dreams come true...

Remember those audio clips from your favorite childhood shows, the ones that pleasurably lifted your scalp off and tickled your brain meats? We celebrate the old ones and make new ones, plus our delectable vocal stylings on accents of the world. -------- Theme Music by Rocky Marsiano Creative Commons License: https://freemusicarchive.org/music/rocky-marsiano/beats-cenas/chamem-me-d

Did you know we're topical? We're SO topical. In this episode, we hit the 3 M's everyone is talking about these days: Mormons, molasses, and Madonna. Incredible. Did you know Boston once lost its greatest men, women and horses to a sticky-sweet flood of molasses in the year 1919? You won't learn this from NPR. (I'm lying, of course. NPR has a whole episode on it. But ours is funnier.) Also in this...

We're special guested -- by yet another therapist! Aren't there enough of those these days? Honestly, you can't throw a stone without talking about somebody's childhood and the first time they fell out of a coconut tree while masturbating. Special guest David is here to tell us all about his origin story in a pink tutu, but only after we sidetrack for our first Small Talk through voice filters. Fi...

Is sex about kindness, or problem solving? Is zit popping about love, or dissociation? Does the endless grind define our lives, and if so, what does it mean that one of us graduated? Our heroic foursome follows the white rabbit down, down, down into the classic themes of therapy: unparentifying, healthy conflict, and most importantly, how to stop screaming so hard you hurt yourself. -------- Theme...

As the sun sets on another Coachella, our crew huddles together for a post-festival session that's as vibrant and diverse as the event itself. With James lighting up the mic, we traverse the sensory smorgasbord of music festivals, grappling with the crunch of chiropractic adjustments and the charm of digital avatars. Our tales of tech mishaps blend with nostalgic beats and the financial enigmas of...

Were there Dad jokes before the Big Bang? Somehow Scot naming a fish Denzel Washingfin is enough to power this entire episode. We also discus our recent stint as students in a stand up comedy class. We cover the doomerism felt by everyone, Lauren's makeloving dry spell, and if you're lucky, dear listener, we might just say 'I love you.' This episode even features a special bonus at the end: 5 minu...

The crew reconvenes after a long break mainly to see if everyone still has a pulse. It's winter in the Bay Area and our basements are all flooded, but not in the good way. Tune in to hear what emotional damage we're dialing in per usual and we'll spoon it in your podcast ear-bowls. Catch us now before the new type of bedbug migrates north and ends civilization.

What are the hottest trends of the past decade? Cyber goth, financial fraud, and having the body of a 12 year old -- wow. But rarely does a celebrity embody all these qualities so effortlessly as our first celebrity guest: Grimes! She's accomplished so much, from being an Austin Texas resident all the way to being a genius artisanal NFT salesperson. Bonus sexy ASMR from Adrien who met a Coachella...

Fearing the future under our new ChatGPT overlords? No problem. Just leave it to our hosts to plan your scenic future, bathing in custom-made AI fanfiction. In a future handcrafted by computers, you'll wallpaper your brain with couture demands. Join us now for our first post-brunch bash. Want to drop us a line? Send any comments or questions to canilaydownpod@gmail.com Music by Rocky Marsiano Crea...

As we return from our winter hibernation, we find ourselves pondering life's big questions. Will we ever love ourselves? Would we screw ourselves, or just one night stand ourselves, or even tolerate ourselves as roommates? Special guest Henry Darling takes us on a horny shame spiral that'll get you off with no hands and leave you in an LTR with your own body.   Want to drop us a line? Send any com...

Should adults be playing Show and Tell? It's a surprisingly divisive issue on this episode as Ari and Scot present their case to Judge Adrien and Judge Lauren in the first-ever instance of Can I Lay Down Court! Passions flair and opinions fly as nothing gets held back, and stay tuned for the main event as we talk about the items we brought.   Special thanks to John Harper ( https://www.fiverr.com/...

Which host pees their pants the most? Our hard-hitting journalism discovers the answer. Also, Adrien reveals he's too cool to have any sensation whatsoever in his gooch. What is the gooch? That's the taint. The nether of the nether realm, the underside of the undercarriage -- which is where we travel, emotionally, to answer some profound personal questions, like "have you asked your doctor if you...

Are you forlorn with no foreskin? No goodie without your penis hoodie? Sad they chopped what you had? Have we got an episode for you -- one that's both visionary AND anti-circumcisionary. We're reducing the stigma around smegma. Okay, we'll just come out and say it: this is our foulest-mouthed episode yet. Enjoy. Want to drop us a line? Send any comments or questions to canilaydownpod@gmail.com Mu...

"So, like... you were in a gang?" What a heart-healing and heart-connecting question for us to explore this episode. Later, Scot reveals the custom songs he hired musicians to make, celebrating the uniqueness of each co-host. Finally, we celebrate global warming -- by discussing our favorite godawful scorching hot day in memory. Original songs for this episode provided by: Scot's Song by SLFM http...

Special guest Courtney joins our hosts for Pride Month to help in an SOS mission: Silence Our Straights! Then we can get back to what the pod's all about: unnecessary shame and how to therapeutically resolve it. The answer? Forgive yourself -- for accidentally talking in a French accent to a French person. Listen and learn how. Want to drop us a line? Send any comments or questions to canilaydownp...

The crew inspects all the names of websites that were bought one year ago and then never renewed. It's like surfing a wave of embarrassing hopes and dreams -- delicious. We also ask an important romantic question in the age of online dating: how DOES one stage and photograph a good hole pic? Want to drop us a line? Send any comments or questions to canilaydownpod@gmail.com Music by Rocky Marsiano...

Dr. Laura, Grimes, and God - what do they all have in common? You'll only know if you listen to our scorching hot takes. Also, Ari demanded the co-hosts bring in new and entertaining segments for the pod -- and Scot delivers with the enigmatic Good Jar, Bad Jar. Want to drop us a line? Send any comments or questions to canilaydownpod@gmail.com Music by Rocky Marsiano Creative Commons License: http...

The gang convenes to tackle important business: declaring FRiEnDs and eNeMIEs of the pod. All of which, naturally, occurs entirely in our heads. In particular, we ponder what intimacy would be like with one of the foremost vulnerability researchers of our times. The answer, as usual, is lost somewhere between therapy and porn. Want to drop us a line? Send any comments or questions to canilaydownpo...

Ari, Lauren, Adrien, and Scot get personal as they each share stories of something they never got over. We're being funny *and* vulnerable. Fulnerable. Get to know us better via the mishaps of our pasts…and other unrelated tangents. Want to drop us a line? Send any comments or questions to canilaydownpod@gmail.com Music by Rocky Marsiano Creative Commons License: https://freemusicarchive.org/music...

Meet the gang! Ari, Lauren, Adrien, and Scot sit down for the first time, and get to know each other on mic. Four Bay-Area comedy friends stare into the abyss and attempt to find out if comedy is the best therapy, or if therapy is the best comedy.   Music from the Free Music Archive and used under a Creative Commons License: Rocky Marsiano - https://freemusicarchive.org/music/rocky-marsiano/beats-...