CALLING HOME with Whitney Goodman, LMFT

Whitney answers two listener questions that share a theme: how do you protect your peace while staying connected to difficult family relationships? The first question explores reconnecting with in-laws after a year and a half of no contact—when is it safe to reopen that door, and how do you move forward without reopening old wounds? The second addresses hosting family in your new home when one rel...

Whitney explores parentification—what happens when children become caregivers, mediators, and "responsible ones" long before they're ready. Whitney shares research on how early caregiving shapes us, when it becomes harmful versus adaptive, and how to transform childhood survival skills into adult strengths without carrying the weight of obligation. She also breaks down the scene between Brittany a...

Whitney tackles an increasingly persistent narrative about family estrangement: therapists are encouraging people to cut ties from their families. Drawing from hundreds of responses from her audience—including adult children and estranged parents—she examines what actually happens in therapy rooms and whether the notion of a "secret underground movement" of therapists pushing estrangement holds up...

Whitney sits down with Dr. Ann-Louise Lockhart, a pediatric psychologist and author of the new book "Love the Teen You Have," to discuss practical strategies for parenting teens and pre-teens. They explore why the teenage years can be so challenging for parents, how to navigate individuation and identity development, and actionable tools for transforming conflict into connection—including how to h...

Whitney responds to a question from a recent controversial TikTok post: Are you a parent forever? What does it mean to be a parent across the entire lifespan? Should parenting meaningful shift at age 18 or at some point beyond? Do parent-child relationships become equal peer relationships in adulthood? Then Whitney answers a question from a parent who isn’t sure how to interact with her adult son...

Whitney interviews Dr. Tracy Dalgleish, author of the new book "You, Your Husband, and His Mother” about navigating mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationships. They discuss why this dynamic is so challenging, the scapegoating of daughters-in-law, triangulation of husbands/partners, the difference between setting boundaries and being controlling, and a few practical strategies for surviving th...

Whitney analyzes scenes from Real Housewives of Salt Lake City and Love Is Blind to explore mother-daughter estrangement, purity culture shame, and how parents either repair or double down decades after causing harm. She breaks down Whitney Rose's advice to an at-risk mother, Bronwyn's devastating conversation with her mom about pregnancy shame, and two different paths to reconciliation in Love is...

Build a more functional family today. In this episode, Whitney breaks down the hallmarks of functional families, how these skills can be learned regardless of how you grew up, and practical steps to get started. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harm...

Whitney shares three life-changing practices that reduced her anxiety—meditation with red light therapy, using Brick to limit social media, and consuming news only in written form. She then answers a caller's question about being the parentified golden child expected to solve all family problems while maintaining surface-level relationships with a mother and sisters who refuse deeper connection. R...

Whitney Goodman interviews psychologist Dr. Julie Fraga about her book "Parents Have Feelings Too." They discuss how parents can process their own emotions, break cycles of guilt and perfectionism, use the Change Triangle to understand their feelings, and teach emotional intelligence to their children—all while navigating the challenge of parenting differently than they were raised. 00:00 The Shif...

Whitney explores patterns around adult children who mimic their parents' harmful behaviors, the complexities of maintaining boundaries when a parent struggles with addiction, and how illness can be weaponized in estranged families. In the Q&A, she answers a caller's question about navigating grandparent illness during estrangement. 00:00 Introduction: Darker Family Patterns 02:59 Airport Obser...

Whitney analyzes the Amazon Prime show "The Girlfriend" to explore mother-son enmeshment and emotional incest. She analyzes how the show illustrates blurred boundaries, guilt and manipulation, marital dysfunction, and the devastating long-term impacts on sons' ability to form healthy romantic relationships, connecting the fictional dynamics to real research on these family patterns. Whitney Goodma...

Whitney reflects on how the "rage economy" of social media and news is destroying our mental health and capacity to connect with others. She explores how algorithms reward inflammatory content that keeps us trapped in cycles of anger and isolation. Later in the episode she highlights a positive example from Real Housewives of Orange County where a parent demonstrates accountability and course-corr...

Whitney Goodman teams up with therapist Kate Gray (@codependencykate) to analyze a viral YouTube video from an estranged parent with over 1.2 million views. They break down common patterns of defensiveness, emotional neglect, and deflection that prevent reconciliation, offering insights for both estranged adult children and estranged parents on how these dynamics play out and what healthier approa...

Whitney breaks down dysfunctional family dynamics in Real Housewives of Miami and The Summer I Turned Pretty, then answers a caller's question about healing from the pain of having an enabling parent who failed to protect them from an abusive narcissistic parent. Enabling parents are often harder to process than overtly abusive ones and Whitney details what finding acceptance actually looks like....

Whitney Goodman interviews Dr. Ingrid Clayton about her new book "Fawning: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves and How to Find Our Way Back." They explore fawning as the fourth trauma response, how it differs from people-pleasing and codependency, why children and marginalized people develop this survival strategy, and how it can masquerade as success while leading to complete self-aban...

SPOILER WARNING: This episode contains major spoilers for the Netflix documentary "Unknown Number: The High School Catfish" Whitney analyzes the Netflix documentary by exploring the psychology behind extreme parental abuse and manipulation. She examines the case through the lens of child psychology, trauma bonding, and the devastating impact when a parent orchestrates elaborate schemes to control...

Whitney interviews Michelle Dempsey-Multack about how to protect children during divorce and co-parenting. They debunk the myth that divorce inherently harms children, exploring how the quality of the divorce experience—not the divorce itself—determines the impact on kids. The conversation includes practical strategies for healthy co-parenting, introducing new partners, and handling difficult conv...

Too often the phrase “grow up” is code for ignoring your past and repressing your childhood trauma. This dismissive “get over it” mentality fails to ever reach a healthy emotional maturity. Join Whitney as she explores what it actually means to acknowledge your past, set boundaries, and embrace your adult power. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of...

In this Q&A episode, Whitney responds to a thoughtful listener question about self-reflection in family relationships - specifically when calling out parents' hurtful behavior makes them withdraw and feel bad about themselves leading to guilt about whether you're part of the problem. She also discusses Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce's engagement then explores troubling father-son enmeshment pat...

Can estranged family relationships actually be repaired? Drawing from research on reconciliation, Whitney outlines the five core ingredients necessary for genuine repair - active empathetic listening, accountability, behavioral change, mutual willingness, and safety. Whitney distinguishes between genuine repair efforts and surface-level compliance, explains when relationships are likely unsalvagea...

In this Q&A episode, Whitney reflects on the polarizing response to her recent "Dear Estranged Parents" episode and shares her feelings about being misunderstood while trying to help families. Later, she discusses reality TV dynamics from Real Housewives of Miami about family sacrifice and entitlement, then addresses a caller's question about why dysfunctional family roles like scapegoat and g...

Whitney speaks directly to estranged parents from her experience working with hundreds of adult children who have cut contact with their families. She addresses common arguments from parents like "I have no idea why this happened," "I did the best I could," and "my children are remembering it wrong." She explains why these arguments often do more harm than good and offers alternative reframing tha...

In this Q&A episode, Whitney addresses a caller whose siblings want them to attend their parents' 50th anniversary trip not out of love, but to serve as a buffer against their abusive parents' dysfunction - and how to handle the pressure when "no" isn't being accepted as an answer. She also discusses sibling dynamics from the Apple TV show "Smoke" and shares her experience with red light medit...

In this solo episode, Whitney responds to the question: can emotionally mature parents still raise emotionally immature adult children? She breaks down the research on emotional transmission from parent to child, examining the roles of modeling, contingency responses, and coaching. Whitney discusses how temperament, bidirectional influence, and developmental timing can complicate outcomes, while p...