CALLING HOME with Whitney Goodman, LMFT

In this Q&A episode, Whitney answers two questions from people trying to figure out where acceptance ends and cutting off begins. First, a woman who thought her mom was finally going to leave her father after a major blowup involving favoritism, triangulation, and infidelity, only to watch her mom stay and start calling her the difficult one instead. Second, a new mother whose parents made her...

Estranged parents often say: “We had a perfect relationship, and then something to them. Social media. A therapist. A partner. Their other parents. They were brainwashed. In this episode, Whitney takes that fear seriously and gives it an honest, research-informed answer. This episode explores: The real history of brainwashing What social media can and can’t do If therapists can implant grievances...

One of the harder truths of estrangement is coming to terms with the fact that your parent was not who you needed them to be and in many cases is not going to become that person. In this episode’s Q&A, two questions circle that theme. First, a couple with two young children trying to integrate not one, but two sets of critical and unsupportive grandparents into their family. Second, a woman as...

Did you ever feel like you’re in a conversation where the other person is just waiting for you to stop talking while they load up something to say? You can talk to members of your family every single day and still feel completely unheard. And it works the other way too. Whitney breaks down the real difference between hearing and listening. In this episode, you’ll learn:  Concrete tools for li...

In this Q&A episode, Whitney answers two follow-up questions from her viral episode on parental curiosity. First, from a listener who wants to stay connected with an 81-year old father who has never once shown curiosity. Second, the opposite problem: a parent who, after a period of estrangement, suddenly asks a genuine follow-up question. The original episode that inspired the second question:...

Is estrangement a privilege for the middle class and the rich? Whitney pushes back on the argument that cutting off family is something only wealthy people do, not because the critique is entirely wrong, but because it's drawing the wrong conclusion.  Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people na...

In this Q&A episode, Whitney answers two questions from people who love their families but are struggling with dynamics that aren't working. First, someone who spent their whole life as the family mediator and peacemaker, has done years of their own healing work, and is now asking how to stay connected to people who have never really shown curiosity about who they are. Second, a husband naviga...

You’ve heard that line before. And it didn’t make things better, did it? Many apologies are not good, and often they make things worse. Whitney breaks down why some people over-apologize while others can't say "I was wrong" at all. She also gives advice for what to do when you're on either side of an apology that isn't landing. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and...

Whitney answers two questions from people who have stepped back from a harmful family relationship, but are stuck in what comes next. First, a wife whose husband is facing a serious health issue and wants to share medical information with his brother, knowing it will reach an estranged mother who will use it as a way back in. Second, a woman estranged from a boundary-violating mother wrestling wit...

When therapists say adult children are cutting off their parents for “normal parenting mistakes,” they're almost never specific about what that means. Whitney asked 300+ people to define a normal parenting mistake and the responses said it all. The episode explores what happens when there's no repair, no accountability, and no willingness to engage with a parenting misstep, unintentional or not, t...

Q&A episodes are back after Whitney’s maternity leave. In the first question, a woman gets into an argument with her mom and sister the day before her daughter's first birthday party and starts to recognize a pattern of always being the one to apologize. Second, a daughter-in-law asks how her husband should handle a mother-in-law who keeps inviting extra people to agreed-upon meetups. Whitney...

Describe your dad in three words. For a lot of adults, the father wound isn't about a dad who left it's about one who was physically present but emotionally absent. Whitney explores why our culture tells you this is actually not a wound at all and why this particular grief is so hard to name. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a memb...

Not all distance in a family relationship is estrangement. Not everyone pulling away is escaping an abusive situation. In this episode, Whitney explores the gray area of quietly drifting from someone you love. Why does it happen? When does it cross into avoidance? What can reconnection look like realistically?  Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder...

Do your parents express curiosity about your life? This was the subject of one of Whitney’s most viral TikTok videos. 2,000 comments later, it’s clear how widespread the pain of answering that question can be. Whitney cracks open what the research says about being known versus taken care of and what families who get this right are doing differently. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Famil...

Whitney breaks down one of the most requested topics from her audience: the neglecting, rejecting and cruel mothers. She defines the different types, walks through the lasting impact of a mother like this on your inner voice, attachment patterns, mental health, and relationships in adulthood. Then she gives practical steps for moving forward. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Thera...

It’s time for an honest look at therapists on the internet. Whitney answers the question of whether or not therapists as influencers and content creators are a problem... which includes an honest self-reflection. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break har...

Some of the hardest parent relationships to name are the ones that look fine from the outside. Whitney breaks down the distant parent-child relationship - what defines it, what it feels like to grow up never quite being seen, and why trying harder to earn closeness often makes the distance widen. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a...

In this episode, Whitney draws together hundreds of emails, letters, and social media interactions to create a profile of a specific type of parent she calls the perpetually estranged parent. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a q...

So you made the decision to leave a harmful family relationship. And you're wondering why it still feels so complicated. In this episode, Whitney walks through why the grief shows up at the strangest times, how to handle doubt without getting derailed, and what it means to finally start building a life that's yours. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder...

Whitney is joined by therapist Emma Mahony to break down one of the most unflinching portrayals of a parentified child on television: Fiona Gallagher from Shameless. Through neglect, addiction, manipulation, and moments of genuine heartbreak, they explore what it does to a child when taking care of your family becomes your entire identity. Emma Mahony is a mental health therapist based in London w...

Not every relationship can be repaired, and not every relationship should be. In this episode, Whitney validates the decision to walk away from a family relationship for good and gives you the language to hold that boundary when the people around you won't stop pushing you to reconcile. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership...

Whitney is joined by therapist Stephanie Lindeman to break down the Roy family from the HBO Max show Succession. Succession is one of the most psychologically precise portrayals of a narcissistic patriarch on television. Together Whitney and Stephanie explore what happens to adult children who spend their lives trying to win approval from a parent who is constantly playing a game that no one else...

When you bring up a painful memory and your parents say it never happened, it can feel like you're losing your mind. Whitney explains the science behind why parents and children encode the same events differently. But how do you tell the difference between that and a parent who refuses to let your reality exist? Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of...

Whitney breaks down Jeanette McCurdy's interview on Alex Cooper’s Call Her Daddy. She discusses enmeshment, parentification and the painful process of accepting that a parent was abusive. Then she answers a listener question about an emotionally immature mother who insists on playing best friend and family authority at the same time. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMF...

Whitney is joined by therapist Patrick Teahan to break down one of the most diabolically toxic mother figures on television: Smurf from Animal Kingdom. Follow Patrick YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@patrickteahanofficial Instagram: @patrickteahanofficial Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people na...