Burning Butterflies

In this episode of Burning Butterflies, we journey back to the summer of 2015, an action-packed time filled with both excitement and growing concerns.   We kick off with Vacation Bible School (VBS), which sparks an innovative and fun initiative by Brandi and Melissa in children's ministry, setting the stage for an exciting year ahead.   However, amidst the flurry of activities, something significa...

In this episode of "Burning Butterflies," Melissa, Brandi, and Amanda dive deep into their experiences at the Ruins to Redemption Women's Retreat, the first retreat held after a year filled with loss and heartache.   Amanda, who was invited to co-lead by Charlotte, shares how her efforts to make the retreat more appealing to a younger crowd blew up in her face. Melissa praises the retreat's setup,...

In this heart-wrenching episode, Melissa, Brandi, and Amanda discuss the tragic events at the Come As You Are Church in 2014-2015, where five major, sudden deaths shook the congregation to its core.   The ladies open up about their personal experiences and the painful responsibilities they were asked to shoulder during this dark time. They discuss the ways they tried to manage the overwhelming gri...

Today the ladies dive into the unspoken yet pervasive double standards within Come As You Are.   Women are often expected to shoulder a litany of duties: keeping the house spotless, cooking meals, making sure to have a daily quiet time, attending Bible studies, ensuring the homework for those studies is completed, serving the church tirelessly, and participating in women's breakfasts. To top it al...

In this episode of Burning Butterflies, we're diving into the chaotic yet revealing story of Melissa's attempt to throw a party.   Initially intended to celebrate Froggy's 40th birthday with a "Game of Life" theme, the event takes unexpected turns. Brandi ditches the party, Amanda gets yelled at, and Charlotte and Froggy derail the plans, turning the celebration into a 60th birthday bash for Pasto...

Welcome to Chapter Three!   In this episode of Burning Butterflies, hosts Amanda, Melissa, and Brandi delve into the tumultuous history of pastoral leadership at the Come As You Are Church. Founded by Tom in 1998, the church has seen a steady stream of pastors come and go, each chosen solely based on Tom's authority, with little formal training and no vetting process.   Join the ladies as they unc...

Welcome to Chapter Three!  "Ruins to Redemption"  This chapter covers the years 2015-2016, which are some of the darkest times in the lives of Melissa, Amanda and Brandi.  In this mini episode, the ladies wrap up some loose ends from Chapter 2 and give you a sneak peek into Chapter 3. 

In this final episode of Chapter 2, the ladies take a reflective journey through their experiences with Christmas Eve services at "Come As You Are."   Melissa shares the immense pressure she felt to constantly outdo herself, striving for perfection under Pastor Tom's watchful eye. Meanwhile, Brandi opens up about the challenges of making sure the children are seen but never heard in these "family"...

Join Melissa, Amanda, and Brandi as they dive deep into the complexities of the 401 class at "Come As You Are." The fall campaign had everyone buzzing with anticipation, but what ensued was a tangled web of manipulation, misplaced priorities, and unexpected challenges.   Brandi opens up about her experience, recounting how she found herself in a group where camaraderie revolved more around drinkin...

In this gripping episode of Burning Butterflies, Melissa shares her story of domestic abuse, revealing the hidden layers of pain and manipulation she endured within her marriage.   But the story doesn't end there. Melissa shares how the toxic environment of "Come As You Are" exacerbated the abuse. Despite the signs of distress, she was convinced that God would perform a miracle, mending the fractu...

In this eye-opening episode, the ladies of the Burning Butterflies Podcast sit down to discuss the unique challenges faced by wives and mothers at "Come As You Are"   With an expectation for women to be stay at home mothers, many find themselves depressed and overwhelmed. The proposed solution? Mom's group. But what happens in an environment where friendships are forced, mental health is off-limit...

In this episode, the ladies sit down to discuss the aftermath of Agency D3 VBS and how Brandi was sucked in to "Come As You Are" so quickly.  Burning Butterflies is a listener supported podcast. Please check out our  Patreon  to learn more about how you too can support what we are doing!   Please help us share our story with others! Follow us on  FB ,  Insta  or  TikTok . Subscribe so you won't mi...

Join Melissa, Amanda, and Brandi as they  revisit the chaos of their first VBS together, just 2 short weeks after Brandi first walked in the doors! In this episode, the ladies reminisce about the unforgettable experience with "Agency D3," the most engaging curriculum the church had ever used.   Despite the excitement, the event quickly spiraled into comedic disarray. From the pastor's grand illusi...

Brandi shared the first half of her origin story with us last week and man alive! In this episode, Amanda sits down with Brandi to get the second half of her story. From moving to Oregon and starting a business, to nearly losing everything, to starting over in Colorado, to finally arriving at "Come As You Are."  Burning Butterflies is a listener supported podcast. Please check out our  Patreon  to...

The long awaited addition to the podcast - Brandi has entered the chat! With Melissa on vacation, Amanda sits down with Brandi as she shares her origin story. From being a private school kid in Orange County, to traveling with the grateful dead, to becoming a "trad wife" in a high control group, this first half of Brandi's origin story will leave you on the edge of your seat! Burning Butterflies i...

In this episode, Melissa and Amanda take a step out of the timeline to check in on where they are right now in real time.  When the podcast was started, the ladies expected people to contact them. They expected chatter from the "Come to The Table" crowd. They expected it to change them personally. Join them as they discuss all of this in their "Reality Check"

In the holiday season of 2013, Melissa dares to break away from the suffocating grip of tradition surrounding the annual Christmas tea. Against the backdrop of familial expectations and societal norms, Melissa courageously ventures into uncharted territory, eager to infuse the holiday season with a breath of fresh air.   But as Melissa charts her own course, tensions rise, and alliances are tested...

Join hosts Melissa and Amanda in a candid conversation on the intricacies of giving within the community of "Come As You Are". In this episode, they delve beyond the conventional expectations of tithing, exploring the murky waters of shady accounting practices and the pressure to give not just financially, but also emotionally and physically.   From the unspoken rules of sacrificial giving to the...

In this episode, Melissa and Amanda dive into the whirlwind of events that took place over just two weeks, leaving everyone involved feeling utterly exhausted.   First up was the church's they tackle the mammoth summer event in the park, which in itself was a non-stop marathon that left even the most seasoned volunteers drained.   Two days later was the inaugural Vacation Bible School (VBS), a ven...

What happens when the concept of belonging turns into a tool for control and manipulation? Join Melissa and Amanda as they confront the uncomfortable truths lurking behind the facade of inclusivity at "Come As You Are" Church.   Whether you're an evangelical churchgoer wrestling with questions of loyalty or an outsider seeking to understand the dynamics of evangelical church culture, this episode...

In the first episode of Chapter 2, Melissa and Amanda embark on a journey through time and delve into the intricate tapestry of American religious history.   From the steadfast Pilgrims seeking religious freedom to the bustling evangelical landscape of today, they unravel the layers of tradition, belief, and doctrine that have shaped the American evangelical church and uncover surprising truths ab...

**Re-upload** In this mini episode, Melissa and Amanda discuss the next chapter in their story.  Chapter 2: Playing Church   Burning Butterflies is a listener supported podcast. Please check out our  Patreon  to learn more about how you too can support what we are doing!   Please help us share our story with others! Follow us on  FB ,  Insta  or  TikTok . Subscribe so you won't miss new episodes a...

In this mini episode, Melissa and Amanda discuss the next chapter in their story.  Chapter 2: Playing Church   Burning Butterflies is a listener supported podcast. Please check out our  Patreon  to learn more about how you too can support what we are doing!   Please help us share our story with others! Follow us on  FB ,  Insta  or  TikTok . Subscribe so you won't miss new episodes and don't forge...

In the final episode of Chapter One, Melissa and Amanda recap how their worlds have collided at "Come As You Are."

As it turns out, Melissa's wedding to Froggy was the beginning of a nightmarish journey. Little did she know that behind the charming facade lurked a narcissistic and abusive partner, whose actions would unravel her life in ways she could never have imagined.   As we trace the unsettling timeline of events post-wedding, the true colors of Froggy's nature are exposed. Melissa's world unravels as ma...