Breaking the Silence

Everyone can relate to that terrible feeling of wanting to shut down, disengage from people, and avoid situations because we messed up. Creed and Crishelle talk with Alex Theobald, a young therapist and PhD student at Texas Tech about being more resilient when we feel shame. He encourages us to be aware of when we feel shame. What are you learning about yourself? His top 3 steps to get past shame...

Most of us grew up feeling awkward about saying the names of sexual body parts and how bodies respond sexually. Creed and Crishelle talk again with Harper Defreitas, a young woman who learned a lot while working for a leading sex therapist for LDS couples, Laura Brotherson. It's really important to be comfortable with these terms and know your body because you’re a sexual being - you’re in charge...

Some people wonder if it’s appropriate to get educated or talk about sexuality with single young adults who plan to save sexual relationships for marriage. Creed and Crishelle talk with Harper Defreitas about the benefits of learning about sexuality now. Harper is a young woman who learned a lot while working for a leading sex therapist for LDS couples, Laura Brotherson. She says education can lea...

Once you get started, how do you keep talking? Creed and Crishelle share some important principles for successful experiences. These conversations work best when it’s a two-sided discussion instead of a one-sided interrogation. You don’t have to make judgments immediately - work to be curious and learn about the other person. You can have dual emotions going on – compassion and fear, for example....

No need to worry about when to start talking about the issue of pornography – Creed and Crishelle share thoughts about how to know when it’s a good time depending on the phase of the relationship. And whenever that time is, it helps to give someone time to prepare for the conversation instead of just jumping in without warning. Show Notes: Get our Free Guide: How to Talk About Pornography When You...

Creed and Crishelle share 3 reasons why it’s important to talk about pornography with your romantic partner. It starts a pattern of open and honest communication in your relationship, you find out if your values are compatible, and you come to understand your significant other’s experiences and emotional context. Why does someone have the emotions they have? Some people have a ton of shame surroun...

Weston shares how powerful it has been to confide in people about his problem with pornography. Starting with  his mom, a good friend, a recovery group, and now with guests and listeners on his podcast. “What I've learned from having a community is that recovery is so much fun and it's so invigorating!” You’ll love this great conversation with Creed and Crishelle ranging from building community, t...

Alma and Karen Thurber return (together this time!) to share what they’ve learned about supporting each other's healing from the impact of pornography. Creed and Crishelle talk with them about how they carve out time for communication, how they make time for each other to do the things that help them keep progressing, and how inspiring it is to see your partner keep growing. They have a tradition...

Creed and Crishelle talk with Jason McDonald, a 22-year-old student and former Reach 10 intern. Jason had a brief habit of using pornography when he was 13, and then decided it was making him feel terrible so he quit. However, pornography had distorted his beliefs about sexuality at that formative age.  It influenced his thoughts and behavior with girls in his teen years. In time he talked with a...

Creed and Crishelle continue talking with Dr. Dean Busby, a professor at Brigham Young University in part 2 of this interview. He helps young adults understand some healthy approaches to sexuality, and what can get in their way. Research has shown there are 3 passion styles – either inhibited, harmonious, or obsessive. A harmonious style is balanced and in line with a person’s values. Also, some p...

If the sex education you got consisted of 2 things: 1. Don’t do pornography, and 2. Don’t be sexual before marriage, then this episode is for you. Creed and Crishelle talk with Dr. Dean Busby, a professor in the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University, about getting past the DON’Ts of sexuality. He teaches that sexuality is the thing that uniquely defines marriage, and young couples shou...

Creed and Crishelle talk with Karen Thurber, a young wife, mom, and entrepreneur with her own  flower business. She is learning to support her husband, Alma (see episode 11) in his recovery from pornography use, and continually working on her own healing as well. Karen shares 3 important tools that have helped her. First is self-care, second is communication in their marriage, and third is reachin...

Creed and Crishelle talk with Alma Thurber,  a young husband, new father, and university student, about 3 of his top tools for recovery from compulsive pornography use. Hear his experience developing a growth mindset, setting good boundaries for himself, and building a support network. Alma shares the danger of a binary mindset (aka black and white thinking) and how it can get in the way of recove...

How are we being influenced by the sexual media that surrounds us? Creed and Crishelle talk with Bonnie Young, therapist & researcher, about the influence of sexual media on expectations of what sex should be like. Pornography shows the antithesis of  healthy sexual relationships, and even subtle ideas that sneak into relationships can cause pain. Bonnie explains sexual scripts and encourages...

Start here if you're a first-time listener! Creed and Crishelle explain what Breaking the Silence is all about. All young adults have been affected by pornography in some way, but it's still hard to talk about.  We're here to help! This is a safe and respectful place to share stories and ideas about overcoming the shame, silence and fear that keep people stuck in pornography. You'll also hear the...

Creed and Crishelle share thoughts on why young adults really do want to talk more openly with friends about tough issues like pornography and sexuality. At the same time, it’s tricky to get started. It’s all about our basic needs as humans to feel valued and feel like we belong. Understanding each other is the root of connection. Listen in for motivation to get the conversation going in your circ...

“Where do babies come from?” Most of our parents dreaded that question! But lucky for us young adults, we can be more prepared than our parents ever were. Talking to our kids (or future kids) doesn’t have to be traumatic or awkward if we get educated and practice talking about sexuality now. Dr. Laura Padilla-Walker is a Professor at BYU in Family, Home, and Social Sciences. She’s an expert on how...

Creed and Crishelle talk to Zachary Andrews about what it was like getting involved in pornography as a young teen, then deciding he wanted to change. For Zachary, building healthy connections with God first, then with people in his life, was the key to his progress. Hear his thoughts on relapse, relationships, and healthy sexuality. Working on recovery from pornography use can be an opportunity t...

What does recovery from porn addiction look like for couples? When should you set boundaries ? What are boundaries, anyway? How do I know if I’m being co-dependent? What does interdependence mean? All of these questions and more are answered in this interview with Amanda Christenson, MFT. Amanda has spent many years counseling couples and individuals struggling with pornography addiction. Hear wha...

Travis Spencer, MFT is a young therapist, but he’s already spent years studying how couples navigate recovery from the impact of pornography. Travis shares what he has learned from his own experience of recovery, his work as a therapist, and his grad school study of couples. Hear about the 5 common experiences he observed with successful couples: a catalyst event that motivated recovery, finding s...

Pornography isn’t just a guy problem. It’s a human problem, and Cassandra (Cassy) Hulse is a young woman on a mission to make sure that women who struggle with pornography use aren’t left out of the conversation. After years of struggling in secret and drowning in shame, Cassy decided enough was enough and came forward on social media about her lifelong battle with pornography addiction. Hear how...

How can young couples navigate the tough topic of pornography when one (or both) are working to stop using it? Nate and Shelby started this conversation while dating and are still relying on the power of open communication in their marriage. Hear what they mean by not letting pornography define a person or a relationship. Validating both partner’s feelings and not taking on the emotional labor of...

Creed and Crishelle talk with Rachel Denton and dive into the topic of healthy sexuality. As a young adult, she's already been deeply involved in projects and organizations helping people overcome pornography. She recently graduated with a Master's degree in social work, works at Fight the New Drug, and is also a therapist at LifeStar Network. You'll hear why pornography use is a symptom of a bigg...

It's our first podcast! Meet our hosts Creed and Crishelle. These young adults have had unique experiences that helped them understand that shame hurts and love heals. Hear their stories about why they are advocates for healthy sexuality and freedom from the impact of pornography. Learn more about the sponsor of the show, Reach 10, and their mission to help young adults create a new culture of com...