Breaking Free from Narcissistic Abuse

Sometimes, the truth can be right in front of you, but you still can't see it. Rossana Faye joins me this week to discuss a concept Dr. Jennifer Freyd, in her book Blind to Betrayal, calls “betrayal blindness.” Some truths can be so devastating that they are difficult to face. And, the self-help tip is the importance of listening to what feels off, uncomfortable, or wrong to recognize signs you ma...

Is it ever okay to go through your partner's phone? I've been guilty of snooping and might consider doing it again. Narcissists and toxic personalities are masters at creating ambiguity. My ex used to readily offer me his credit card after we first started dating. He'd send photos of broken machinery and take me on company runs, all as a way to build trust so that I couldn't tell real company cris...

An all-too-common problem is narcissists and pets. Toxic people often pose a serious danger to our beloved animals. In this podcast, Lisa Sonni and Dr. Kerry discuss the relationship toxic people often have with their family pets. Narcissists will often shower animals with love and attention only to harm the pets in private. The self-help tip includes some important boundaries to consider when beg...

Have you been a victim of spiritual abuse? It's not just interpersonal relationships that can be toxic, but also group systems and leaders. Many are stepping forward to expose toxic church leadership and oppressive and abusive spiritual belief systems. This week, Natalie Hoffman, author of Is it Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritua...

Have you ever wondered, "Am I the narcissist?" Have you been accused of being the problem? In this podcast episode, Rossana Faye joins me to discuss how to know who's creating the chaos. Narcissists are notorious for never seeing themselves as the root cause, but how do we know that the issue isn't us? And the self-help tip is how to use your history to identify dysfunctional relationshi...

Is being overly controlling a form of abuse?  In this podcast episode, Lisa Sonni joins me to discuss the subtleties of coercive control. Learn how to recognize the common control tactic of this insidious form of abuse. And this week's self-help tip is to assess how your partner's feelings and demands affect you. Are you doing less and becoming increasingly isolated to please them? Submit your que...

Stonewalling or giving someone the silent treatment is one of the nastiest forms of unfair fighting. When we ignore or reject another person's bid for a connection more than thirty percent of the time, the likelihood the relationship won't make it dramatically increases.  In this episode, Lisa Sonni joins me to discuss why stonewalling is such a popular toxic behavior and what to do if it's happen...

Have you wondered what's wrong with me? This could be a sign of gaslighting. Dr. Robin Stern, psychoanalyst, author, and expert on gaslighting, joins me to discuss the underlying dynamics of a toxic or narcissistic relationship. She delves into the hidden motivations of both the gaslighter as well as the gaslightee. • Learn more about Dr. Stern • The Gaslight Effect Podcast • My Interview with Dr....

Leaving often brings along with it a fear of change. We might dread how change will affect our kids or our friendships. Maybe we're concerned about how leaving could disrupt life as we know it.  In this podcast episode, Tara and Dr. Kerry discuss the fears of change they faced and how they overcame them to leave. Tara also is leaving the show and shares about her future plans.  The self-help tip i...

Could living with a narcissist be making you sick? Are you struggling with more illnesses? Maybe you even have an autoimmune disease. In this podcast episode, Tara Blair Ball and Lisa Sonni discuss the invisible impact of living with a narcissist on our health. Learn how narcissists and other toxic people not only sabotage our self-care but also impact our physical and mental health. Resources: Th...

Are you stuck in a bad relationship? Are you wondering if you have good enough reasons enough to leave? In this podcast episode, Rossana Faye, Rollercoaster of Love, joins to me to discuss how self-doubt can trap us in a bad relationship. How we can get stuck in our own heads, which only adds to the confusion we already feel in narcissistic relationships. And the self-help tip is the power of find...

Are you considering divorcing a narcissist? Wondering how to do it safely? In today's podcast, Kate Anthony, a High-Conflict Divorce Coach and author of The D Word, joins me to discuss how to become our own best advocate when leaving a narcissist. She covers the top dos and don'ts to exiting these challenging and even dangerous relationships.  Kate Anthony: https://kateanthony.com The D Word: Maki...

Are you feeling off-balanced? Do you wonder how your narcissistic partner or loved one is keeping you confused? In this podcast episode, Tara is joined by Lisa Sonni of Stronger Than Before, and they delve into how narcissists and toxic people employ intermittent reinforcement and other manipulative strategies to keep victims confused. The self-help tip is the importance of analyzing one's investm...

One of many harmful stereotypes men face is that they can't be victims of narcissistic abuse, yet the rates of narcissism are nearly equal between men and women. In this episode, Brent MacLerie, social media activist and advocate for gender issues, joins Tara and me to discuss his experience of narcissistic abuse along with the common challenges many male victims face in abusive relationships. To...

When there's been a massive breach of trust, victims experience what's called betrayal trauma.  Yet, there's often a rush to fix the duplicitous partner instead of the one betrayed, neglecting the victims' psychological devastation.      In this episode, Lisa Sonni joins Dr. Kerry as a regular special guest, and they discuss victims' common betrayal reactions. And the self-help tip is the importan...

Did you think you had met the most amazing person only to discover you had married a stranger?  Narcissists and other toxic personalities often wait until their partners are trapped by commitment before beginning more serious abuse and betrayals. In this episode, Tara and Kerry share how narcissists often unmask their real selves after moving in together or while on the honeymoon.   And, the self-...

Are you managing trauma triggers in new situations or at family holiday celebrations? Are you struggling with sudden fears, rushes of emotions, or disturbing flashbacks? In this episode, Dr. Kerry and Tara discuss coping with trauma triggers after narcissistic abuse. Learn helpful strategies for managing these challenging and unexpected triggers. Links: FX's The Bear Submit your question to be ans...

Do you struggle each holiday with the toxic family drama? In this episode, Tara and I discuss the common traps that can keep us from having a meaningful celebration. The self-help tip is how to re-adjust our mindset and expectations so that we accept imperfection as a part of every experience. Submit your question to be answered on air here! Resources ReclaimYou : Dr. Kerry's AI-powered coaching a...

What red flags are you missing? Are you ignoring the early warning signs of a possible toxic relationship? In this podcast episode, Dr. Heidi Brocke from the It's Not Normal, It's Toxic podcast joins us to share the common reasons we fail to recognize the initial symptoms of a toxic relationship. To learn more about Dr. Heidi: https://coachingwithdrheidi.com It's Not Normal, It's Toxic podcast : h...

Dependency can be an early red flag that you're trapped in a traumatic bond with a narcissist. When you feel like life without them is meaningless. In this week's episode, Dr. Kerry and Tara draw from personal experience the first signs that signaled their trauma bonds and what to do if this is happening to you. The self-help tip is on staying grounded in the present to sidestep the pitfalls of 'f...

Are you fighting a lot? Maybe it's better to learn how not to win an argument with a narcissist. In this podcast, Dr. Kerry and Tara delve into the problem of arguing with a narcissist. Why these discussions often go sideways with the end result of hurt feelings and being defeated. And the self-help tip is practical things to remember the next time a narcissist tries to bait you into a heated disc...

Have you wondered why narcissists ruin holidays? Why they can't let you enjoy Thanksgiving, Christmas, or your birthday? In this podcast episode, Dr. Kerry and Tara share their insights and tips , along with some personal stories about this common pattern among narcissists and other toxic people. And the self-help tip is the importance of having "self-care" boundaries to handle uncomfortable holid...

Are you suddenly alone? Learn how a narcissist isolates you as a way to gain control over you. How they cut you off from your closest friends and family, making you more vulnerable to abuse. Are you looking for an understanding community? Join Dr. Kerry's Toxic-Free Relationship Club with weekly live group video office hours. https://kerrymcavoyphd.com/toxic-free-relationship-club/ Books mentioned...

Do you want to know why you're not spotting a covert narcissist? Learn what is a covert narcissist and the early signs you've met someone toxic. In this episode, Dr. Kerry and Tara take a deep dive into the top reasons why so many of us struggle to spot a this particularly toxic group of narcissists. And in the self-help tip, learn what to do if someone you know threatens to harm themselves. Submi...

Are all narcissists abusive? Aren't we unfairly classifying a group of wounded people as toxic or dangerous? Tara and I address this common accusation about narcissists and other toxic people in this podcast episode. The self-help tip is how to use a detailed history of our personal background to determine if we might be the one causing the relationship problems. Submit your question to be answere...