Blueprint: Raising Good Men Podcast

Let’s get something straight. If you are uncomfortable kissing your son, that discomfort did not come from biology. It came from culture. And culture is wrong. This is not about turning boys soft.. This is not about turning fathers into therapists. This is not about politics, ideology, or whatever team you think you’re on this week. This is about raising boys who do not grow into brittle men. Stro...

We meet Tony Soprano joyfully playing with a family of ducks, quite a robust , balding, middle aged man in his trademark bathrobe and boxers, submerged in his own backyard pool, feeding them like somone briefly convinced he has achieved domestic harmony. His own family observes, perplexed. Then the ducks leave. And Tony has a panic attack. Later, in therapy with Dr. Jennifer Melfi he admits he’s t...

It is incumbent upon us, as fathers, to celebrate the arrival of a newborn properly. with intent, noise, and at least a vague sense that something ancient has been satisfied. The gods must be notified. Chief among them are Odin and Thor, custodians of wisdom, violence, strength, storms, and extremely poor anger management. They demand brute strength, fire, smoke and preferably a meat-based sacrifi...

In the days following the arrival of my newest family member and future hunting partner, my son Viktor, I was reminded of something both obvious and strangely under-appreciated: experience matters enormously when raising a child. This should surprise no one. And yet, every first-time parent behaves as though the universe has unveiled a never-before-seen creature, operating by occult rules, requiri...

Stealing Bread for Starving Children When asked, almost any father will confirm they would rather steal bread than allow his children to starve. and who can blame them? And if compared to Breaking Bad ’s fundamental stated premise: What if Mr. Chips turned into Scarface - and the method was producing high quality Crystal Meth? Full post here This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss t...

We now know that modern digital platforms are engineered systems designed to capture attention through dopaminergic feedback loops, optimized relentlessly to keep us engaged, scrolling, and mildly dissatisfied. I highly recommend the documentary The Social Dilemma , which was my first eye-opening gut punch on just how effective these systems are at watching us, learning us, and gently herding us i...

When you ask people what makes a good father, opinions are like a******s: everyone has one. Patient. Kind. Present. Strong. Helpful. Wealthy. Smart. They’re not wrong. But they are incomplete. Like listing tools without asking what they are used for. easy to say. A man can be patient. Patiently apathetic, not caring one bit what actually happens to his son. Perhaps he’s too self-involved. Too worr...

It’s five o’clock on a Friday. Supermarket is full. People buying dinner. Beer. Nachos. With dip. Maybe some avocados and lime for that nice guac. Blonde hair bounces past me. A boy, about six. Short legs, explosive energy, a chocolate smear on the front of his shirt. It’s a sunny day. Probably the remains of a previous chocolate ice cream. First impression: a cute kid. He’s clutching a box of Ben...

If you wish to ruin your son, begin by making him comfortable. Smoothen out his days, lessen his frustrations. Explain away his disappointments before they have time to settle. This will reduce conflict and preserve harmony. Protect him from discomfort. Step in early, and often. When he fails, clarify that it wasn’t really his fault. It was the world’s. And when he struggles, remove the struggle....

Friend of mine told me about his son the other day. He’s four and doing Jiu Jitsu. Pretty cool, exercise, coordination, learning how to move around other kids without hurting them. Maybe also hurting them. A little. All in good fun. Anyway. He’s four, which means he’d rather be climbing the wall and exploring the ceiling than listen to the instructor. So before the class my friend tells him: “I’ve...

It’s incumbent upon us as fathers to give our sons the strongest chance in life to become men. A good parent makes the necessary sacrifices knowing that, if all goes well, the child will one day no longer need them. That is the goal. Read full Substack post here About the Author Icelandic father, husband, dog trainer, builder and storyteller. Writing a blueprint for fathers: How to raise good men,...

And here’s the uncomfortable truth for fathers. Raising sons well costs money. Not obscene wealth. Not yachts or Ferraris. Just enough margin to breathe. Read the rest here This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit goodmenblueprint.substack.com

…parents lie to their kids all the time. About everything. To spare them. Because the truth is inconvenient, painful, frightening. It’s easier to say “everything is fine,” even when it isn’t—when the money is tight, the marriage is strained, a war’s going on. My argument is simple: telling the truth, responsibly, helps children grow into proper human beings. Yes, you’re burdening them with reality...

Combined with living like a human being (walking instead of always taking the car, stairs instead of the elevator, playing regularely with my kid) strength training kept me sane. The discipline required to bear the weight — to show up every single time, rain or shine, hungover or tired, happy or sad — gives you a massive advantage when life hits hard. And trust me, life will hit you…. Read the ful...