Black Marriage Therapy

The American psychologist Donald Meichenbaum claims that we are all “storytellers” and that we should be aware of the stories we tell ourselves and others. Some people might see themselves as “prisoners of the past” or as “stubborn victims.” These phrases are not idle metaphors; they are the organizing schemas that color the ways individuals view themselves, their world, and their future. In this...

Trust is gained in drops and lost in buckets. Many of us have heard this quote before and know it to be true. Whether you were the one who lost trust in someone or the person who spilled the bucket; everyone knows the feeling of losing trust in someone or losing someone's trust. On either end the feeling sucks. These betrayals can make it hard to trust in the future, especially with an intimate pa...

Nothing will give you a real assessment of your relationships like problems, issues, or crises. For us, the assessment was given by a health scare. But I am grateful that the assessment showed how far we have truly come in our relationship. 5 years ago Junior and I decided to move our relationship from role-oriented to goal-oriented and to model our relationship based on partnership. Since this, o...

According to Brené Brown, a researcher at the University of Houston, shame is an “intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.”  It’s an emotion that affects all of us and profoundly shapes the way we interact in the world. So, what does shame have to do with relationships and marriage? A lot! At its core shame affects connec...

Before you get married most people will tell you that communication is foundational and super important to the success of your relationship. But what is communication? how can you communicate effectively? and what do we do when communication has gone off the rails and we are in conflict?. In this episode, we discuss all of these things and help to offer a new perspective on communication that can...

We are experiencing unprecedented times because although we are more connected than we have ever been we are also more alone than we have ever been. I believe what most people are seeking is intimacy they are looking to be seen. In this episode, we discuss Intimacy (Into-Me-See) in marriage and its importance as a foundational piece in our relationships. We are also joined by a special guest my hu...

On our wedding day, we blissfully stand in front of one another and we promise to stick together forever. We make a commitment but do we truly understand what we are committing to and what it takes. In this episode, we discuss how to keep the promise you made and what it takes to be committed. Join us every Thursday for more topics on love and marriage. If you have any questions you would like to...

Black Love is not just a hashtag or a trend it is a necessity. Because of our history in this country, we have had to celebrate and support our love. We have come through hell and high water as a community but we have still persevered and so has our love. In this episode, I discuss black love, its past present, and future. Join us every Thursday for more topics on love and marriage. If you have an...

Fantasies can be fun and exciting but they can be damaging to a relationship. In this episode, I discuss fantasies and fallacies men and women may hold before coming into relationships. Join us every Thursday for more topics on love and marriage. If you have any questions you would like to be discussed on the show feel free to send a dm to @blackmarriagetherapy or email info@blackmarriagetherapy.u...

What happens to us in the past never really stays in the past. When there is unaddressed and unhealed trauma lingering from our past we drag those experiences with us into the future and into our relationships. So how can we resolve the trauma in our past in order to promote a healthy long-lasting relationship? In this episode, I discuss trauma and its impact on your current relationship and how a...

Why is it that in our society 50% of marriages end in divorce? Is there something we’re missing? I think that the missing piece is marriage education, whether considering marriage or already married scientific research overwhelmingly demonstrates that marriage programs are effective. These studies make the case that marriages are not merely enabled to survive, but can also thrive when couples lear...