Behind the Therapy Door

The quest for efficiency and order is life blood for Thinker Types.  In efforts to avoid negative emotions or acknowledgement of loss or perceived failure, Thinker Type personalities can become frustrated and attempt to control self and others.  When in distress, this control can be administered with criticism and an exaggerated aversion to drama or time waste.  On the flip side, their rich focus...

What is it we all want and can never attain long term?  Control…that is why it is an illusion!  Taking permanent control over life is like grabbing a fistfull of air…impossible!  In this episode, we discuss the various ways different personality types try to maintain control to manage uncomfortable emotions.  We unpack different strategies for leaning into the “Both/And” concept to work towards co...

Who doesn’t love the ornery attitude and spontaneous creativity of a rebel mindset?  People on the end of the angry blame game, that’s who!  In this episode, we explore the pit-falls of phase distress in Rebel Type personalities.  For those struggling with angry blame, tune in for some tips to explore patterns of self-doubt and inappropriate delegation, that can lead to self-sabotage via emotional...

Remember that old adage, “opposites attract?”  Well what about “birds of a feather flock together?”  There is truth to both of these famous phrases and in this episode, we unpack how to thrive in relationships with our polar opposites, as well as how to deepen connections with our dopplegangers.  It is all about balancing strengths and needs in partnerships, celebrating differences, and finding co...

Trust can be tricky, especially for Persister Type personalities in distress.  Learning how to let others do their part, not feel responsibility for their success or failure, and confront our very real feelings of fear and mistrust can at times feel like wrestling an alligator in murky water.  For some, it is easier to express anger and intense disapproval, but that just gets us more of the same…m...

Blindspots are everywhere and we all got ‘em!  These cognitive distortions, which are irrational thoughts that shape our perceptions and emotions, often lurk below our conscious awareness and can wreak havoc on our self-worth and on our relationships.  Good news is that we can grow our awareness of them, when we are engaging in them, and back out of them with proactive self-care and communication....

For some, anger can be a debilitating or frightening experience that leads to conflict avoidance, anxiety, and sadness.  For others, anger can be liberating and inspire change.  We will all experience conflict many times in our lives, so we all need to learn how to recognize the signs of anger and develop healthy strategies for working with the emotion and communicating effectively through it.  In...

Who doesn’t like sandwiches?  Figuring out where we begin and end in context with others can be a confusing at times.  We certainly do not want to be a victim of codependency and base our self-worth solely off of others approval.  We also do not want to be bulls in a china shop and assume everyone will accommodate us...how obnoxious!  Learning to set healthy boundaries without walking on eggshells...

Kids…you gotta love ‘em because you can’t punch' em!  Just kidding…kids are the best and having the privilege of raising them is one of life’s greatest adventures!  In today’s episode, we will explore the brain structure and normal development stages that kids go through, with a special emphasis on teenagers and young adults.  Transitioning from parenting to coaching is the name of the game! ...

Welcome to our nerd fest…Behind the Therapy Door!  This episode is all about attachment theory, the 4 types of attachment and signs that indicate which one is most prominent within yourself, and how various personality types demonstrate attachment distress patterns.  Attachment and the wiring of neural circuitry begins in utero and continues throughout the life span.  Knowing how we are attached a...

In today’s episode of Behind the Therapy Door, we take a deep dive into the definition of trauma, both big and small, how trauma impacts the nervous system, and a variety of coping strategies for soothing the nervous system into a more regulated state.  We name drop some pioneers in the field of trauma treatment and explore various treatment modalities including EMDR, Brainspotting, and Somatic Ex...

Hey friends, welcome back to Behind the Therapy Door hosted by Sarah Thome and Matthew Gallagher.  Today we will visit the process of starting therapy, finding a good therapist, and learning to tip toe into the depths of vulnerability.  Learning how our defensive behaviors have served as emotional protection can assist us in better self-acceptance, the courage to change unhealthy behaviors, and wi...

Thanks for tuning in this week to Behind the Therapy Door hosted by Sarah Thome and Matthew Gallagher.  In today’s episode, we will be discussing the communication power behind the concept of Both/And.  This therapeutic concept helps us take perspective, be more open to compromise, be less defensive, and continue efforts towards differentiation and emotional regulation.  Learning how to honor our...

Thanks for joining us this week Behind the Therapy Door hosted by Sarah Thome and Matthew Gallagher.  In this episode, we will explore the many twists and turns of miscommunication, patterns of distress, and argumentation that often take place in even the healthiest of relationships.  We will identify helpful tips and introduce the concept of Both/And, to assist in emotional regulation and differe...

Welcome back to Behind the Therapy Door hosted by Sarah Thome and Matthew Gallagher.  How boring would life be if everyone was the same and communicated in the same way?  Though it would be predictable, it would also rob us of the ability to learn and grow by engaging with others who have different ideas and emotional temperaments.  In this episode, we will share a helpful communication modality k...

Welcome to Behind the Therapy Door hosted by Sarah Thome and Matthew Gallagher, counseling therapists who offer candid descriptions of the therapeutic process, theories of personality, and self-help strategies to help you live your best life. Join us for a peek behind the therapy door. theaffinityconsultants.com Cover art by Scott Thome Music composed by Justin Breame