Become More Compelling

If you've ever frozen mid-conversation, overthought what to say, or replayed a moment 500 times in your head… this episode for you. You'll learn a 4-step framework—borrowed from a literal fighter pilot—that'll help you stop second-guessing and start speaking up . You don't need a new personality. You don't need to be the loudest person in the room. You need a system that keeps you present and movi...

Are you putting in effort to get better socially... but still feel stuck? If you're an overthinker, this might sound familiar: 👉 You're applying effort—but not seeing the results you want. 👉 You feel like you're doing the right things—but progress is slow. 👉 You're trying—but something's not clicking. That's not a sign you should give up. It's a sign that your effort might be getting stalled in...

Quick question for you: How can you jump into a conversation without feeling awkward? Ever find yourself hesitating to join a group, fearing you'll disrupt their flow?  You're not alone! It's normal to fear that awkward silence that hits when you walk over. But don't worry, I've got some tips to help you start more conversations in your day-to-day life. In this episode of the BMC podcast I cover…...

Belief you need to unlearn: Everyone is constantly judging you. Unlearning this can make you more socially successful, a better communicator and help you stop overthinking social situations. Why is this important? Believing everyone is judging you can paralyze you in social situations, making you hesitant to speak up in meetings, approach new people, or share your ideas. Letting go of this belief...

Do you have to step out of your comfort zone to be interesting? Yes, but shattering your comfort zone isn't the answer, do this instead. Let's dig in. Good things happen outside your comfort zone. If we all stayed within our comfort zones, we'd be on the couch watching Reels all day. While that's safe and low-risk, it means missing out on opportunities for growth. Stepping out of your comfort zone...

Do you ever feel nervous meeting new people? Here's a game-changing concept: You don't have to like everyone, and not everyone has to like you.  This realization can make your interactions smoother and less nerve-wracking. ✅ Embrace that not every interaction will be magical. ✅ Increase your "surface area of luck" by meeting more people. ✅ Focus on your 50% of the interaction—be open and enthus...

A belief that you need to unlearn is "You need to be perfect to succeed" "Perfect" can take many forms socially... "I need to say something really profound in this meeting."  "I could say that thing, but it's not interesting enough."  "I could ask this question, but it might sound silly." "Perfect" is that imaginary bar that you need to jump over to give yourself permission to speak up.  It's a tr...

Do you want to make more friends, build your network, and throw parties that make people say "I can't WAIT for the next one!"?  My guest Nick Gray is here to show you how!  He's sharing secrets straight from his book The 2-Hour Cocktail Party . In this episode, you'll learn: How throwing a cocktail party will expand your network. How to get 90% attendance at your party. When/how to send out remind...

Note : Video version of this episode is on YouTube here: https://youtu.be/331eiJKvKIc   Look, we've ALL been in social situations where we feel a little nervous. Maybe we want to make a good first impression, be more charismatic and charming, or just have a good interaction. In this episode, we'll look at 5 ways to be charming even when you're nervous. And we'll look at none other than the Batman...

Note : This episode is on YouTube here .   Wonder Woman has... Super strength. Super speed. A Super lasso. Gal Gadot has a superpower too: super charisma.   In this video, I'll breakdown 5 ways Gal Gadot displays charisma and how you can adapt them for your own personal charisma.   Hop in your invisible jet, grab your lasso of truth and enjoy  this episode of Compelling Breakdowns !   NEXT STEP: Q...

I used to think time travel would be awesome...until I read an 1883 etiquette book.   Life in the 1880s: 17 drinks before breakfast. Waiting for the automobile to be invented. Some light assault of service people. More drinking.   Grab your powdered wig, dust off your top hat, get in your horse and buggy and let's learn some Victorian-era etiquette!   NEXT STEP: QUIZ - Do you know what your commun...

Have you ever wondered how to not be boring in a conversation? Maybe you really want to be more interesting, but you don't know how, maybe you KNOW deep down that you're not boring, but you just need some pointers. In part 2 of this series, we're going to cover 4 ways you can be less boring and more interesting in a conversation. NEXT STEP: QUIZ - Do you know what your communication style is? Take...

Building the skill of being witty in conversation is super important. When you meet a new person at work, for example, and you're able to crack a joke, it demonstrates that you don't take yourself too seriously, have a good sense of humor, and are socially skilled. All good things! If you've ever wondered how to be witty in conversation, this episode will fix you up! We'll look at three clips of W...

It's been two YEARS since I've done a Q&A show.   That's far too long!   Today, we're going to cover three questions:   1. How can you make conversation with the company CEO in the elevator?   2. Should you skip small talk and jump right to big talk?   3. How can you feel comfortable around new people?   Let's dive in! NEXT STEP: QUIZ - Do you know what your communication style is? Take this quiz...

Building the SKILL of talking to anyone with confidence is SO important. If you're not able to  communicate with confidence, it'll be more difficult to advance in your career, lead/inspire your team at work, or be confident in a social situation. In this episode ( video here on YouTube ), I'll show you 5 ways to talk to anyone with confidence. You'll want to stick around till the end of the epis...

If you've ever wondered how to network with people, you're not alone.   When someone says "Networking" it makes me think of American Psycho where a bunch of yuppies sit around comparing business cards.   "MY GOD...IT EVEN HAS A WATERMARK."   Networking doesn't have to feel that way!   And in 2020, most networking is sending a DM or email.   But how can you get noticed (in a good way) and connect w...

Have you ever wondered how to not be boring in a conversation?   Maybe you really want to be more interesting, but you don't know how, maybe you KNOW deep down that you're not boring, but you just need some pointers.   This episode is for you.   I'll cover 6 ways you can be less boring and more interesting in conversation.   NEXT STEP: QUIZ - Do you know what your communication style is? Take this...

How To Be A Great Storyteller. Having the skill of telling a few good stories is a really important people skill. Pulling out a great story can be a fantastic way of entertaining people, providing information or even persuading others.  In this episode, I'm going to break down a story by Bill Hader and walk you through 4 tips on how to tell a great story. You'll be able to use these storytelling t...

In this episode, I'll share 5 tips to help you stop being shy.   I spent YEARS being shy, and it was really hard, because I knew that I had so much that I wanted to contribute in social situations.   These tips will help you break the shyness cycle and be less quiet in your next social interaction.   NEXT STEP: QUIZ - Do you know what your communication style is? Take this quiz and get a custom re...

Look, if you have a habit of people-pleasing, you probably get requests like ...   "Can you hop on this Zoom Meeting?"   "Hey, can you drive me to the Airport on Friday?"   "Hey, can you petsit my Egyptian Pharaoh Hound? He requires constant fanning with a palm leaf."   People pleasers tend to say "Yes!" too much. And it comes with a cost!   The more you say yes to others, the lest time and energy...

"Just fake it until you make it!" This is popular advice-especially if you're trying to improve your people skills. Should you fake it until you make it? The more we take action and do something, the more our identity moves to align with the version of us that does that new thing. Our thoughts FOLLOW our actions. In this episode, I'll walk you through a couple of tips that will help you make it, (...

Should you care what other people think? There's a lot of advice floating around telling us to not care what other people think. (Sometimes in more...colorful language than that.) I've never liked the concept of NGAF. But the reality is, caring less about the outcome of any given social interaction can massively help your people skills. In this episode, I'll walk you through a couple of exercises...

If you've ever looked around the room and thought...   "I'm an imposter! What am I DOING here?!"   Then you've experienced imposter syndrome.   In this episode, we'll drop-kick imposter syndrome and also teach you how to use your ego as a tool.   ---   People mentioned:   Scott Adams   Platon    ---   Be sure to go to Become More Compelling and get your free 56-minute audio guide on joining & enjo...

Most people hesitate socially.   "Should I say this or that?"   "I don't want to rock the boat!"   It's time to get BOLD.   In this episode, we'll talk about how to be socially bold.   --- Be sure to go to Become More Compelling and get your free 56-minute audio guide on joining & enjoying group conversations. (You'll also get articles, podcasts, videos and much more to help you supercharge your p...

The intent you carry into any social situation matters!   If you're not thinking about the right things, it can make having great social outcomes MUCH harder.   In this episode, we'll talk about social intent and what you can do before your next Zoom meeting, first date, or dinner party. (After COVID-19 quarantines clear)   --- Be sure to go to Become More Compelling and get your free 56-minute au...