Elena Heart

At Least You’re Not Me

Society EN ↓ 8 episodes

At Least You’re Not Me is my comedy storytelling podcast, where I turn my real-life disasters into entertainment. I’ve been married three times — legally, financially, emotionally. In each episode, I share brutally honest and funny stories about marriage, divorce, dating, starting over, moving countries, and surviving adulthood with humour intact. I’m Elena Heart, a stand-up comedian and professional bad decision maker, proving that no matter how messy your life feels — at least you’re not me. New episodes drop fortnightly.

Author

Elena Heart

Category

Society

Podcast website

www.youtube.com

Latest episode

May 14, 2026

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Episodes

I Told a Support Group About My 3 Marriages… And They Applauded | Life Detox Gone Wrong 14.05.2026

I joined a “life detox” support group thinking I was finally going to fix my life… Instead, I met Henry. A man with three failed marriages, suspicious levels of emotional intelligence, and enough motivational quotes to make me question whether I’d accidentally joined a wellness cult. In this episode of At Least You’re Not Me , I share what happened after my first chaotic self-help session — from c...

I Thought I Was Fixing My Life… Then I Met Henry | Life Detox Gone Wrong 30.04.2026

I walked into a “life detox” support group thinking I was finally going to fix my life… …and instead, I met Henry. In this episode of At Least You’re Not Me , I share what happened when I stepped into a room full of strangers trying to rebuild their lives — and realised I might have accidentally joined something that felt suspiciously like a cult. From awkward introductions to unexpected honesty,...

I Thought I Was Doing Fine… Then Life Turned Me Into a Tree 16.04.2026

This is the moment I realised life doesn’t get fixed… it gets weird. In this episode of At Least You’re Not Me , I share one of those experiences that starts off normal and slowly turns into something completely unexpected. Somewhere between trying to keep everything together and pretending I had control, I ended up in a situation that made absolutely no sense… and yet somehow made perfect sense a...

I Should’ve Left When I Saw It… (The Strangest First Date I’ve Ever Had) 02.04.2026

I should’ve left the moment I saw it… but I didn’t. This episode is one of the strangest and most uncomfortable first date experiences I’ve ever had — starting with a blind setup, a man who brought something very unexpected to dinner… and a night that only got worse from there. If you’ve ever been on a bad date, ignored a red flag, or stayed longer than you should have… this one will feel painfull...

My Husband Believed I Poisoned Him | A True Toxic Relationship Story 19.03.2026

In this episode of At Least You’re Not Me , I tell the true story of the moment my marriage collapsed. What started as a relationship with an ambitious entrepreneur slowly turned into paranoia, hospital emergencies, and a husband who became convinced I had poisoned him. After a violent moment on a balcony and a punch through the wall next to my head, everything began to unravel. Within weeks we we...

I Gave Him My Retirement Savings | Love, Money & Relationship Red Flags 05.03.2026

He was confident. He was ambitious. He had everyone convinced. Including me. In this episode of At Least You’re Not Me , I share how I transferred my retirement savings into a business built on promises — and how that decision slowly unraveled into financial collapse. This is not just a relationship story. It’s about: Dating over 40 Financial red flags in relationships Mixing love and money Suppor...

He Pretended to Go to Work for a Year | Marriage Lies & Red Flags 19.02.2026

He left the house every morning. Suit. Briefcase. Confidence. I believed him. In this episode of At Least You’re Not Me , I share the story of my second husband — the man who pretended to go to work for an entire year while secretly spending his days in a park. This isn’t just a funny marriage story. It’s about: • Financial deception in relationships • Ignoring red flags • Emotional manipulation a...

Three Husbands and a Coffee Mug 05.02.2026

I’ve been married three times — legally, financially, emotionally. In this first episode of At Least You’re Not Me , I tell the true stories of the three men I married: a man-child, a financial disaster, and a final boss who thought salt was government surveillance. If you’ve ever felt bad about your dating life, relax. By the end of this episode, you’ll feel much better about your choices. 🎧 At...

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