At Last She Said It

"The power struggle that's inherent in this telestial sphere between men and women is the source of all of our pain…" In this short bonus, Kathryn joins Cynthia and Susan to explore a few more ideas about patriarchy. Could it stand in the way of women and men realizing our full potential?

"While there are things I love about the organization, and most especially the people and community, I also see the messiness, the warts, and I see some very real pain and damage in it all. And so here I am today, living at the edge of inside." In this special bonus, Jeralee reflects on her faith journey and the lessons she's learning along the way, sharing an adaptation of her presentation from t...

Are women complicit in their own marginalization within the Church? In their Season 5 finale episode, Cynthia and Susan unpack the idea of complicity, and some obstacles to overcoming it. It's an itchy topic with no easy answers. But the real focus of the conversation is a call for women to support other women as a necessary first step to change. If we can't allow for different experiences, and si...

In this Part 2 episode, more Latter-day Saint women share stories of personal feminist awakenings. It's hard to shake the unsettling realizations once we begin to see through a feminist lens at church. For these episodes, Cynthia and Susan asked listeners to talk about their feminist journeys. Do you think about things today the same way you did 5 or 10 years ago? If not, what has led you to see t...

There are probably as many versions of a feminist awakening as there are feminists. Some have always felt aware of the disparity between men's and women's experiences and opportunities. For others, the awareness has come more recently. Either way, it's hard to shake the unsettling realizations once we begin to see through a feminist lens at church. For this episode, Cynthia and Susan asked listene...

Language is powerful. The words and phrases we use repetitively in church create well-worn pathways in our brains. Each time we think in a certain way, practice a certain task, or feel a certain emotion we strengthen and grow that pathway, making it easier for our subconscious to find again and again. Whether it's hearing male pronouns associated with deity or studying scriptural records written b...

In her book, The Mother Tree: Discovering the Love and Wisdom of Our Divine Mother, author Kathryn Knight Sonntag wrote, "Further exploration of the Mother is part of the unfolding Restoration in our hearts." Today many women are feeling led to explore the divine feminine more deeply, or for the first time, in an effort to erase the separation that has existed between Latter-day Saints and our Hea...

What does it mean to a Latter-day Saint young woman when she hears that virtue and chastity are 'most dear and precious above all things?' Purity Culture is a movement built on teachings of sexual abstinence before marriage, with the insidious slant that girls and women are responsible for not only their own purity, but that of boys and men. Young women face strict dress codes and years of lessons...

For women who have experienced some kind of faith shift or feminist awakening, how to raise children in the Church may become a perplexing question. We may want something different from the messaging and experiences—cultural or religious—we grew up with. We may want a more expansive idea of God than is presented in correlated materials. We may hold more nuanced views than some official positions....

How do you think about repentance? Is it a way to become pure? A way to change direction? A way to accept responsibility for harm we've caused ourselves or others? And how do you feel about an organization that doesn't apologize? Can we make amends without acknowledging harm? Repentance is something we hear and talk a lot about at church, but we don't all think about it the same way. In Episode 11...

In this short bonus episode, Cynthia and Susan share a few more listeners' experiences and feelings about temple sealings and the policies around them. Spoiler: It's complicated.

Disparity in the Church's sealing policies for men and women is something many members never think about until their life experience reveals it in some way. The truth is, a variety of complex real-life scenarios may change the idea of sealing from a joyful eternal prospect to a painful eternal sentence for some Latter-day Saint women. If you are widowed, divorced, remarried, or single, your sealin...

Having learned about her well-defined role as a wife and mother from the time she is a young girl, when and how does a Latter-day Saint woman develop an understanding of who she is as an individual? Over time, not living in alignment with our true self is exhausting, and may be detrimental to health and happiness. 'Finding yourself' may sound cliché, but self-discovery is key to making choices abo...

'Blessing' is a catch-all word. From prosperity gospel to the laying on of hands, it is used to describe a transactional approach to our relationship with God: we do something and believe we are 'blessed' as a result. But when we try to connect those specific dots in our lives, things can get tricky. Such a transactional view may challenge our faith as often as it affirms it. In this follow-up con...

In this short bonus episode, Susan shares "Circles of Light," the essay in which the phrase 'I'm in the process of staying' originated.

"Why do you stay? How do you stay?" Because the conversations on this podcast often highlight problems Latter-day Saint women have observed or experienced in their church lives, these questions come up a lot. Every so often, it's helpful to check in with oneself for the current answers. In this episode, Cynthia and Susan discuss the process of staying: what that process looks like for them, and wh...

There's a lot of pressure around missions in the Church. From the time they are very young, our children hear the clear expectation that they will serve. But the decision to serve, the realities of mission life, the possibility of returning home early, and the pressure to make big life decisions soon after a mission ends, can all weigh heavily on young Latter-day Saints and their families. "The re...

There's a tension in our church between things that change and things that some members consider to be unchangeable. It can be hard to distinguish between the two, and our history would suggest that more things are probably changeable than we think. Figuring out what matters, why it does, and when that may change is an ongoing process, personally and institutionally. To answer those questions for...

In this short bonus episode, Cynthia and Susan say a little bit more about the temple—a topic so big, there will always be more to say.

For our 100th episode, what could be more fitting than a discussion about the temple? It's the centerpiece of Latter-day Saint worship members believe sets our church apart from all others. Many women can trace their most sacred experiences to it, but for others—from the wording to the rituals—attending the temple causes deep unease. Having complicated feelings about something so reverenced can be...

Who we pray to and how we envision God is personal, but the Church organization can and does limit our collective discourse about Heavenly Mother. Many feminists have been disciplined for speaking and writing publicly about Her. What does this silencing say about the importance of the doctrine? And is an unwillingness to allow deeper engagement with the feminine divine in our teaching and worship...

The term 'invisible woman' refers to the feeling many women have that they lose social value as their ability to attract the male gaze fades with age. But do older women disappear in church, as well as in society? And how might a woman's spirituality change as she moves through her second half of life? Cynthia and Susan explore their own experiences and those of listeners in this conversation abou...

When one thinks about the events of Jesus' life and ministry, it's natural to think about women. The Bible shows us a man whose inclusion of women was radical within its cultural context. Yet for most of history, his namesake religion has been marked by near-total domination of the patriarchy. What happened? Greg Prince once asked Chieko Okazaki a question that bears repeating: "…where do we need...

If you grow up in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, is God a man, a woman, or both? It's a complication we bump up against a lot, if only indirectly, in our religion where God is Heavenly Father, but is also one of a pair of Heavenly Parents. Some members don't seem to notice the absence of the divine feminine in our collective dialogue and worship, while some feel it acutely and ye...

In this brief bonus episode, Cynthia and Susan discuss some effects of the pandemic on their own faith and church lives.