Ask Christopher West

Questions answered this episode: I’m discerning marriage with a wonderful girl and I discovered a hurt in my heart that I wasn’t fully conscious of. While growing up I was always scandalized and nauseated every time I perceived hypocrisy from others, especially in marriage celebrations. I knew that all the display of vanity that society prescribes is about appearance and virtue signaling to others...

Questions answered this episode: I’m a mother of 5 living children. I’ve lost 2 daughters from miscarriage within the past year. My womb has become a tomb for 2 deeply desired little girls. I was unable to hold my baby girl after the first miscarriage, but my second loss occurred after 16 weeks. My body did not detect the loss and I was induced to deliver her at almost 20 weeks. She was perfectly...

Questions answered this episode: I’m a part of a pro-life non-profit organization. Even though my journey began in 2015, it was only recently that I discovered the potentially abortive nature of many contraceptives leading me to remove my IUD. I’m married to a good husband. Unfortunately, he believes society’s message that even within marriage the responsible thing to do is to use contraception wh...

Questions answered this episode: How are men supposed to understand this sudden obsession with p*nis size and measurements? How can one deal with the shame society places on certain male body parts? I’ve been in a relationship with my partner for just over a year now. I’m a Catholic and he is not. He is open and respectful even though he expressed he would wait for me until marriage. I ultimately...

Questions answered this episode: _1. How can Catholics and students of TOB help bridge the gap when protestants and Catholics read a different set of books of the Bible? My fiancé & I had some intense experiences as teenagers. I was rped as a child and that broke me so much that I was consuming prn from a very young age and had an active and uncontrolled sx life. I felt particularly alone in t...

Questions answered this episode: I strive for holiness and go to daily Mass & Rosary but from past wounds I’ve realized that my wounded interior girl longs to be loved, recognized & accepted by men. For this reason I tend to love men much younger than me. I also have disordered feelings and thoughts toward men that strive for holiness like priests & seminarians. I feel ashamed and reje...

Questions answered this episode: Did John Paul II identify the 4 ruptures? My husband and I have been married for over 35 years. We’ve been through very difficult challenges in our married life and my body is not capable of intercourse. It’s been 5 years since our last union. Why do I feel shame about myself and my inability to give what I don’t have? What does the Bible mean with the words “give...

Questions answered this episode:
 How do unbaptized people fit into the body of Christ? My husband and I are new Catholics. We both have a past in regards to sexual sin. While dating we frequently had to stop ourselves in times of passion and it seemed like he was always aroused when we were together. Then we got married and all of that went away. He never wanted to have sex in the earlier part of...

Questions answered this episode: I’ve been fighting the good fight for chastity and I was managing well but it’s become much more difficult now that I have a girlfriend. Do you recommend I break up with her? If we are freed from original sin at our baptism, why do we still experience labor pains? What is the role of beauty in the life of a Christian? How can beauty help me deepen my relationship w...

Questions answered this episode: I’m familiar with what the TOB teaches about the marital embrace and the mutual self giving that occurs there. It’s difficult to understand this in my heart. Prior to marriage I experienced multiple episodes of sexual abuse. I engage in relations with my husband to be a gift to him. I know it is important to love him in that way. However, in my heart it doesn’t fee...

Questions answered this episode: I’m a 21 year old college student. I’m struggling to make peace with my girlfriend’s sexual past. I’ve experienced healing but remain very wounded. My girlfriend repents of her past but has also lied to me about some of the details she has shared. Some of those details I find deeply troubling. On the one hand, I understand we should show mercy, embrace the wounds o...

My girlfriend and I have been dating for almost 2 years now. She’s in her second year of medical school. We both desire a chaste relationship. We both have a good understanding of the TOB but also fail to live it at times. Now that we've started to talk about marriage, sometimes she feels like she’s ready but there are also times when she shares that she thinks she doesn't want to have chi...

Questions answered this episode: What role does lingerie have in the intimate union of man & wife? Can it be a beautiful & holy part of the marital embrace? If so, how? My wife and I have had our first baby recently and along with that blessing there have been some difficult changes for our early 20’s. My wife is struggling with body image issues. Unfortunately she has severe stretch marks...

Questions answered this episode: My fiancé shared more with me about his past and surprisingly I was calm and received him with mercy. I’m not sure if it was the initial shock of hearing him share these vulnerable moments of his past or because I had previously wondered and assumed there was some sexual brokenness there. I thank God for my response and hope that my fiancé seeing me receive him wit...

Questions answered this episode: Is there a particular theological significance of Eve being created from a rib out of Adam’s side? My boyfriend enjoys watching videos & movies that fall into the comedy category, which is not my favorite genre. This is not something I enjoy. There are times when I find these movies painful to my heart because of the content they have. Am I just being too uptig...

Questions answered this episode: What is a good elevator pitch for the Theology of the Body? I became pregnant at 17. With the help of my parents and a pregnancy resource center, my son and I have been able to have a very happy life. He’s now 2 and I’m about to turn 20. I’m not with the father of my child. He sees his son from time to time but I’m the one who cares for him. I’m okay with this, but...

Questions answered this episode: When JPII talks about using another person as a means to an end I always imagine a couple but what happens in the case of a single person who seeks to give pleasure to him or herself? Is the person using him or herself? To what extend does that affect the person or others? Why does this sin leaves a feeling of loneliness? How do I make steps to open those places to...

Questions answered this episode: What is one way each of you has grown since you got married and what was that growing process like? What your number one tip for people when discerning a future spouse? What is the experience of writing a book like for you? Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share th...

Questions answered this episode: I’m part of a conservative Catholic group on Facebook. I was surprised to find that many Catholics there believe NFP is contraceptive except in the gravest circumstances. When I questioned this philosophy, they said that the fact that God gave them each of their many children is that it would've been sinful if they had abstained during those fertile times. This...

Questions answered this episode: How can I bring Jesus into the marital embrace without envisioning him sexually and in a pure and holy way? I’ve been struggling to find my wife attractive. Am I justified expecting my wife to shape up for looks’ sake or even for health’s sake? How much of this is the impact that porn has had on me and my perception of beauty? Ask Christopher West is a weekly podca...

Questions answered this episode: How can we love Jesus on earth when he doesn’t have a body? How can prayer feel more like a full relationship and not just long distance communication I was homeschooled and raised in a close knit immediate family. We never spent much time with relatives or friends and my parents always sought to solely invest in each other and their children. On the other hand, my...

Questions answered this episode: What does JPII mean when he talks about Ordinary Mysticism? What would your answer be to when people ask “are you done having kids?” Is there a preferred method when buying books from Catholic authors? Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom,...

Questions answered this episode: I’ve heard Christoper say many times “Christian know thyself” and thought I knew what it meant but have been searching for the quote and can’t seem to find it. Where does this quote come from and what does it mean? How do you respond to the arguments about how homosexuality, masturbation and pedophilia are natural because animals do it? I’ve heard you mention that...

Questions answered this episode: How can I show my nieces and nephews my true delight in them and help them feel truly loved and desired in the way that I never felt growing up? I would like to prepare my husband’s body for burial after death. I think I misunderstood the biblical teaching of uncleanliness and handling the dead. Can you help me sort out the fear of being unclean by touching a dead...

Questions answered this episode: Can TOB shed any light on the sin of racism? Is it wrong to give a kiss if there’s even the slightest bit of arousal present as a dating couple? I’ve struggled with the sin of masturbation for the past 10 years. It comes and goes in seasons. Recently, I’ve experienced great temptations while I’m asleep. I awaken in the night with urges I can’t control. Do you have...