ADHD Realities

If you've ever been told you're just lazy, that you lack willpower, or that GLP-1s are some dangerous experimental drug — this episode is going to piss you off in the best way. Dr. B sits down with obesity medicine specialist and lipidologist Dr. Spencer Nadolsky to cut through the noise and get into the actual science of GLP-1 medications — what they are, how they work in the ADHD brain specifica...

Everyone has an opinion about porn. Almost nobody is looking at the actual research. In this episode I am doing what I do in my human sexuality classroom on day one — separating what we actually know from what we have simply been told, repeatedly and loudly, until it started to sound like fact and those are not the same thing. We are talking about why "porn addiction" does not exist as a clinical...

This episode goes everywhere — but somehow still lands exactly where it needs to. I sat down with Elle Stanger, AASECT certified sex educator and longtime sex worker, to talk about the massive cultural confusion surrounding sex work, sex trafficking, criminalization, and morality. What unfolds is a chaotic, honest, ADHD-style conversation about: why society constantly conflates sex work with traff...

You've seen the posts: "Never date someone with ADHD" vs "ADHD is a superpower." Both sides are loud, both are pissed, and both are missing the point. Most relationship research measures executive function, not love. And when we use neurotypical relationship standards to evaluate ADHD partnerships, we're measuring the wrong shit. In this episode, I break down what the data shows, why the parent ch...

If you've ever been told you're "lazy," "not trying hard enough," or "just lack discipline"... yeah, this one's for you. I sat down with ADHD educator Kendall Delamont for a conversation about what ADHD really is and all the bullshit it's not. We're talking about why ADHD isn't a moral failing or a time management problem, why the internet's dopamine obsession is mostly wrong, and why generic ADHD...

In this episode of ADHD Realities, I’m unpacking why the way we talk about desire — especially in heterosexual relationships — has never sat right with me. For years, we’ve framed libido differences as “higher vs. lower drive,” quietly centering access instead of capacity, and calling it neutral. It isn’t. We talk about what happens when desire gets mistaken for entitlement, why fluctuating desire...

In this episode, I’m joined by Caitlin V, sex and relationship coach, researcher, and host of Good Sex, for a conversation that is giving male pleasure the nuance it deserves. We unpack why so many men experience sex as pressure instead of pleasure and how performance anxiety shows up as premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, delayed ejaculation, or complete shutdown, often without anyone na...

“She has energy for everything else — just not for me.” This episode unpacks one of the most common and damaging misunderstandings I see in relationships, especially when ADHD and autism are part of the picture. We’re talking about why energy isn’t about effort, love, or priority, it’s about access, executive function load, and nervous system cost. And why, in heterosexual relationships, women are...

What happens when sex therapy is built for brains that don’t work like yours? In this episode, I sit down with clinical sexologist, researcher, and former dissertation chair Dr. Erika Miley for an unfiltered, deeply nerdy, and very human conversation about ADHD, sexuality, and why so many people—especially cis women and AFAB individuals—are still being failed by the research and clinical models me...

Every January, the world expects us to reinvent ourselves like we’re software updates — new routines, new habits, new personalities. But ADHD brains aren’t failing resolutions… resolutions are failing us. In this Extra Hot, no-BS episode, I break down exactly why New Year’s resolutions collapse for ADHD minds (especially if you’re juggling work, parenting, sensory overload, or perimenopause chaos)...

Why are we still recycling 1800s pseudoscience about masturbation? In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Eric Sprankle to unpack where these beliefs started, why they stubbornly survive, and how moral panic replaces real science. From fetal self-soothing to porn ‘addiction’ myths, to why ADHD brains often get misdiagnosed — we hit every uncomfortable truth with humor, clarity, and zero shame. More...

What if your “rotting brain” isn’t rotting at all — it’s regulating? In this fiery, science meets sarcasm episode, Dr. Leann Borneman breaks down the viral panic around rot culture and doomscrolling — and explains why most of the research behind it was never designed for ADHD brains in the first place. We’ll talk about: Why scrolling funny, happy, or comfort content isn’t “doomscrolling” (and why...

Why were we all labeled “too much” before we ever got a diagnosis? Let’s interrupt that story. This week, I sit down with Dr. Gilly Kahn — psychologist, mom, and author of Allow Me to Interrupt: A Psychologist Reveals the Emotional Truth Behind Women’s ADHD. We unpack the late diagnosis epidemic, the emotional toll of masking, rejection sensitivity, and how outdated diagnostic criteria still leave...

Is porn really rewiring your brain? Does masturbation harm relationships? Or are we caught in cultural shame scripts that make normal behaviors feel dangerous? In this episode, I unpack the research, from claims about erectile dysfunction and “porn addiction” to the ICD-11’s take on compulsive sexual behavior. Drawing from my clinical work with 100+ men, I explore how moral incongruence, secrecy,...

In Episode 25 of ADHD Realities, I sit down with the brilliant Lauren Elise Rogers—holistic sexuality educator and embodied intimacy coach—for one of the most raw, liberating conversations yet. We dig into how early scripts of shame shape women’s sexuality, why confidence in the bedroom is sexy as hell, and how unlearning old conditioning lets us reclaim play, curiosity, and real pleasure. Lauren...

Ever been mid masturbation and thought, “Why am I analyzing this toy like a product review instead of actually enjoying myself?” Or maybe the opposite, you’re left wondering if your clit is broken because nothing’s happening. In this episode of ADHD Realities, Dr. Leann Borneman dives into how vibrators interact with ADHD brains and sensory processing differences. From overstimulation (too sharp,...

Erections, testosterone, fertility, penis size—men’s health is full of myths, shame, and bad TikTok advice. In this episode, I sit down with Urologist Dr. Justin Dubin to cut through the noise and get real about what’s actually going on with male sexual health. We talk about why erectile dysfunction can be an early warning sign for bigger health issues, how testosterone really works (and what kill...

If you’re an ADHD mom wondering why everything feels louder, harder, and more exhausting lately, then this one’s for you. In this episode, Dr. Leann Borneman gets real about the absolute chaos of motherhood with ADHD, and why the invisible labor, relentless demands, and sensory overload aren't just “part of the job”, they’re a setup for burnout. And if you’re also in perimenopause? Buckle up, beca...

What do you do when you realize you’re completely disconnected from your body, burned out, and expected to maintain a thriving sex life? In this episode, I sit down with psychologist, certified sex therapist, and author Dr. Kate Balestrieri to talk about her new book What Happened to My Sex Life?—a raw, real, and relatable exploration of desire, disconnection, resentment, and the slow road back to...

In this no-BS solo episode, I dive headfirst into the relationship narrative that’s wrecking ADHD partnerships... the idea that "if you cared, you'd just show it." You probably do care. Your executive function is just struggling with the neurotypical expectations attached. I break down why ADHD brains struggle with “prioritizing” in the ways neurotypical society expects by explaining the real role...

In this episode of ADHD Realities, Dr. Borneman sits down with Dr. Jessica McCarthy a licensed neuropsychologist and clinical psychologist, for a no-BS, deeply validating conversation about what it really means to live with ADHD in a world not designed for our brains. Together, they unpack the messy middle between medical models and neurodiversity movements, and explore the danger of relying too h...

What if the systems we move through every day like school, work, life, were actually built to support the way our brains work, instead of working against us? In this episode, I sit down with my longtime friend and neurodiversity advocate Dave Thompson to unpack what real inclusion looks like in the workplace. From childhood diagnosis to system level change, Dave shares how his personal and profess...

Ever felt totally in the mood... until your clean skin, mental fatigue, or the idea of grabbing the lube made your brain shut down? In this intimate solo episode, Dr. Leann Borneman dives deep into the real life overlap of ADHD, executive function shutdown, sensory overload, and the confusing disconnect between wanting sex and being able to access it. This isn’t about low libido, it’s about bandwi...

If sex has ever felt like a confusing chore, a pressure-filled performance, or just… not designed with your brain in mind, you are not alone. In this episode, Dr. Leann Borneman sits down with bestselling author and sex therapist Dr. Laurie Mintz (📚 Becoming Cliterate, A Tired Woman’s Guide to Passionate Sex) for a raw, hilarious, and deeply validating convo about orgasms, desire, and a little on...

Why does receiving oral feel like work for so many vulva owners with ADHD? This episode unpacks it all: the sensory chaos, the internal monologue that won’t quit, the vulnerability overload, and the executive dysfunction that makes "just enjoy it" feel like a cruel joke. I dive deep into: How gender scripts, shame, and ADHD intersect in the bedroom Why “let go and enjoy” is NOT trauma-informed adv...