Abject Suffering

Back in the late '70s and early '80s, Britain was overtaken by treasure hunt fever, sparked by a childrens' book called The Masquerade and its promises of a valuable gold rabbit for anyone clever enough to solve its puzzles. The contest ended in allegations of fraud, and this cursed rabbit went on to become the basis for an outright scam called Hareraiser, a duo of games for microcomputers that we...

Warm up your pipes, you opera singing leeches, because we're going to talk about the game that we blame for murdering classic-style Resident Evil experiences. Taking place shortly before the events of the original Resident Evil, STARS Bravo team medic Rebecca Chambers and failed Chili Peppers clone Billy team up to fight through a train and some anonymous facilities full of zombies and leeches, al...

It's very hard to be a Castlevania fan, especially when Konami decides that this very ugly and shallow Power Stone clone is worth releasing. Famously featuring a story line where a little girl wants bigger boobs, it also has hideous costume redesigns for a large number of beloved Castlevania characters, and a pretty lame excuse plot.

Swords & Darkness, a game you've never heard of, is a very poorly made side scrolling Demon's Souls game released on the 3DS eShop. It's broken in some pretty entertaining ways, so give this a listen and save yourself the $7!

This week Gary brings a character with a very ill-advised product pitch, then we get into talking about this charming and not-fun Cinemaware game about ants. Please stow your picnic baskets.

Probably one of the most hideous games we've covered for the show?

A baffling game gives way to a discussion on obstinate linguistics.

We use this kind of okay point and click adventure game as an excuse to eat stunt food. Warning: Mouth sounds abound.

We head back to the Power Rangers well to learn more about what teens do on the moon.

The conflict that will tear the network apart.

We didn't know there was a Sopranos game, and neither did you, probably.

Gary's favorite game! He says it! He can't take it back!

This little businessman sim is actually pretty good, so we do a kind of job interview of our own.

An indie game with a simple premise: highlight how much regular video games make using a gun look easier than it actually is.

We really got cheated when it came to extreme sports. It's all just crotch hugs, with very few robots in sight.

The Popeye universe is more vast and more pointless than we initially imagined.

We stretch the concept of "concepts" to the limits.

We were excited to play a band simulator, but all we got was Lemonade Stand plus puns.

From one of the best games of all time, to an unmitigated disaster.

Episode 350 introduces a beloved character that will endure for decades to come.

How has Top Gun remained a cultural touchstone for all of these years?

We stumbled into a gross one. Sorry, folks.

Get ready for us to be effusively positive about an extremely strange and nostalgic experience.

Take a good book and make a wonderful movie out of it, then wait 30 years and make a terrible movie and somehow a worse game of that movie.

Talk about submarine life segues abruptly into the dismal dystopia of Cameo.