A Thousand Tiny Steps

Tammy went on a journey to find her diagnosis: Primary Hyperparathyroidism. Countless doctors, tests, misdiagnoses, and so many pills it made her head spin. After all the turmoil, she found her diagnosis, got treatment, and is living a great life today running again.   Key Takeaways:   [2:01] Finding out I have high blood pressure again and again  [3:53] The beginning of taking medication after me...

Eleanor joins me again to discuss our new relative: how we found her and the mix of emotions surrounding it. Excited, nervous, and a lot of feelings over the memory of our brother Jeffery. Finding out our deceased brother had a child who will never get to know him is another twist in our lives.    Key Takeaways:   [4:45] A woman reached out asking if we were related [7:46] Feeling intimidated, exc...

Kelsey is the amazing woman who supplied me donor milk when Jack was young. This concept didn't exist when I was younger and I'm so glad this option does now. It's a great opportunity to connect with other moms, get advice, and have support to breastfeed and not use formula if that's what you choose.    Key Takeaways: [1:47] Nursing all my kids to older ages and using donor milk  [11:55] I nurse i...

As I give out MollyB awards and receive an award of my own, I reflect on what I'm doing in my life, how I'm working towards my goals, what my priorities are, and how I am adjusting to my life which is changing rapidly.    Key Takeaways:   [1:09] Life still carries on even if Molly is dead  [3:04] The story of Fanny Minot the person who I received the award in honor of  [8:36] Matt Bonner: a famous...

Jenn is a mortician who turned her life around. After dropping out of high school and working a low paying job that made caring for her children different she met her wonderful husband and got her GED. But when she got into her forties, she felt like she needed to do something for herself. So what did she do? Go to mortuary school, of course.    Key Takeaways:   [2:05] Dropping out of high school,...

I'm tired of people telling me how to feel, how to grieve, when to grieve, and for how long. Many people project their emotions because they're uncomfortable, but sometimes people just need to sit in grief and not have it minimized.    Key Takeaways:   [0:44] Stop telling me how to grieve and projecting your emotions  [2:27] The memory chair  [11:51] Minimizing grief and the advice people give  [1...

There has been drama in my town because the prom has been moved locations. This had me reminisce about my own prom, the things others remembered, the history of the prom in my town, and how it should be about bringing the community together.    Key Takeaways:   [1:45] The drama with the prom [3:27] What I remember about my prom  [9:21] The prom moved to a few key locations, but it's kept shifting ...

Brenda has achondroplasia, a genetic condition which impacts her bones, but she doesn't let it stop her from living an ordinary life. She talks about how it impacts her day to day, all the businesses she's owned, and how she's never know anything else so she doesn't feel that different.    Key Takeaways:   [0:43] Brenda's condition and how it impacts the body  [6:00] A controversial treatment  [9:...

When I met Marty in high school, I didn't know it would lead to a decades long friendship, but here we are. We got together to discuss running at Boston College, the drama that came with it, what new sports Marty has discovered, and how our life has changed as we age.    Key Takeaways:   [0:43] How I met Marty: be beating her in a race  [4:18] A love hate relationship, what unified us, and how we...

My friend Tim, is an extraordinary person who advocated for himself to get a kidney transplant - from a pig. With the help from his wife Karen, he prepared himself for the transplant, recovered, and is now living a better quality life. Although it is only a gap until he can receive a human kidney, it has helped give him and others on dialysis hope.    Key Takeaways:   [1:15] Tim's kidney failure r...

I finally went to the Boston Marathon again, contemplated more deep feelings of grief, and saw some old friends from the running community. I think I'm finally ready to join the running community again and get involved in things. In this episode, I really want to hit home that you do what you need to do to get through grief.    Key Takeaways:   [2:45] Going to the Boston Marathon again  [4:32] Los...

As we are upon 10 years without Molly, this anniversary hits especially hard. It makes me relive all the days surrounding it, what I was like, what happened, and the connections that I've found. In this episode, I go into what has changed over a decade and what still remains the same.   Key Takeaways:   [0:36] The doctors proving Molly was dead was horrific  [3:01] Going back to the Boston Maratho...

Baylie's story is one of a night with friends gone wrong and how a series of choices lead to her death. From the police, to the hospital, to the investigation, to fighting to pull her off life support because she didn't want that was a rollercoaster. It was so much more traumatizing than it had to be. But it inspired Shawnee to start a foundation, advocate for college safety, having a will, and wr...

Skyler's story is full of ups and downs from having a rocky childhood to getting pregnant while addicted to then finding sobriety with a husband that supports her. Through her journey she has posted on social media sharing her story, most recently of the last words she said to her mom and the things that will stick with her for a lifetime. Key Takeaways:   [1:48] My parents were addicts, being abu...

As I got into an argument with Gracie, it made me dive deeper into a topic that's not talked about enough: sibling grief. People often focus more on the parent's and not the child that has just lost the person they spent their formative years with. This can cause Gracie and I to have very different views and ways of grieving, but it has also opened my eyes on how to be more understanding.  Key Tak...

This week, I sat down with my sister Eleanor who had a very different upbringing than me considering our father was 82 when she was born. She talks about the judgements people have, having to work hard to forge connections in the family, and how she looks past ageism to come from a place of understanding.  Key Takeaways:   [2:58] My dad was 82 when I was born, but my childhood was normal  [10:46]...

In this episode, I just ask for you to sit with me in grief of losing my child. My thoughts on the birth of all my children, what I love, what I miss, and why dates are so important to people who are grieving. I contemplate Jack's personality and the parts of both Molly and Gracie I can see in him.  Key Takeaways:   [1:37] Jack's birthday and my children's births  [4:53] Dates are important and I...

Michelle and I sat down to have a conversation on her work with the nervous system, biofeedback, neurofeedback, traumatic responses, and addressing the root of a problem. She takes on work that's not traditional in a therapist's office, but is so needed because of the mind/body connection.  Key Takeaways:   [3:15] Michelle is a complementary therapist and looking at the nervous system  [10:34] Tea...

When Amy's best friend's parents were murdered she suddenly didn't just have a brother, but three new siblings who needed a lot of help after the trauma. That left Amy in limbo with her family dynamics and not feeling like she had a place. It shaped her identity as she went on to become a therapist. Key Takeaways:   [2:33] Amy's friends parent was murdered and suddenly they were all living with he...

I got to talk with Emily, a former runner of mine who was a highliner, dealt with Lyme Disease, chatted about how the cycle of trauma can continue, and the life that she's living now. A nomadic one with more freedom to run her own business and take of her own life.  Key Takeaways:   [2:33] How Emily got into highlining  [12:09] Dealing with Lyme disease  [20:37] Splitting up from her husband  [25:...

In this episode, I talk about my season of guests, how the podcast has changed, and debating what will happen in the future with the podcast. I have some amazing guests lined up who are all in some way connected to me.  Key Takeaways:   [3:28] My first season was about Jack and the second was about Molly [4:21] My third season about trauma and the fourth season was about being a mom  [6:17] Season...

Filing a lawsuit came with its trials and tribulations, but it also came with a check: dead Molly money. It has taken me so much time to process Molly's death and put together a foundation. I have finally decided it's time to really make the foundation into something, instead of just giving money away because doing so will help the true spirit of Molly.  Key Takeaways:   [1:45] Having to be quiet...

This week, I sat down with my friend Jenn, a teacher who has helped create a thrift store and a period program for students. The Red Dot Program helps people have access to all types of period products and clothing without having to go to the nurse or make a big announcement.  Key Takeaways:   [2:56] What the Red Dot Program is and Jenn's first period  [7:22] Periods are not taken as seriously as...

I'm just angry. I don't know if I'll ever stop feeling angry when it comes to certain trauma, but I'm learning new ways to mitigate it. In this episode, I dig into what people think anger is, how I'm mad at myself, and why it's okay to be angry, but what really matters is how you express it. Key Takeaways:   [2:07] I make plans, they don't go my way, I know they won't, and then I get angry  [5:34]...

Period poverty and the stigma surrounding getting products, learning how to use them, and having them on you is an uphill battle. People miss school, sports events, and other important life activities all because they might not be able to afford period products or are too ashamed to ask for free ones.  Key Takeaways:   [2:07] The pop culture movies that shaped how many women feel about periods  [9...