A Therapeutic Dose

The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City took us back to the Boston Tea Party for anachronistic hot dogs and drug tests on ice! Wild Rose’s MLM misfire has sent Whitney & Justin into financial and marital distress. Everyone, again, reiterates that Meredith acted crazy on a plane, so Meredith calls everyone a liar. Oh, and Heather bought an Air Fryer – go girl, give us nothing. Time to throw on a...

It was a carnival of toxic couples on The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City this week! Britani & Jared took the gold, Bronwyn & Todd landed silver, and Lisa & John secured the bronze. Meanwhile, while the congregants of The Church of Satan choked down Vida Tequila, Mary’s congregation came alive under her freshly painted golden arches (ba, da, ba-ba-ba)! Time to inappropriately badger...

The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City delivered another banger this week! From a unicorn stuffie floating in the cobalt waters of The Grenadines, to Meredith Marks coming unglued at 30,000 feet, this episode left us shook and shocked and sure that Lisa was admitting guilt by stress-eating those nuggets. Time to force your heritage on a teenager, make an “arrangement” with your elderly husband, and...

On The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, we hit our limit of rocking seas & retching ladies, while the ladies hit their limit of Lisa’s lies & leaks! Meanwhile, “Angie and Mary in a Yacht Cabin” remains our favorite show-within-a-show. And we may not know if Todd can pat his head & rub his stomach at the same time, but we HAVE learned that he can simultaneously fart & french kiss...

The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City take to the sea, where Lisa gave us her version of “These Gay*s (* Heather) are trying to murder me!” Bronwyn was fashionably late, sporting questionable fashion. Meredith straddled the fence like Britani straddles Jared every time she commits to 30 days of no contact. And Angie carried around a barf bucket and got tucked into a bed of ice. Time to do a shot o...

What an episode!  The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City gave us miscommunication in marriages, a devastating distance between mother and daughter, and a friendship-threatening fart! Time to snatch the maraschino cherry (and all joy) from Bronwyn, order a Steamer to absolve any absentee parenting, and tune into this week’s A Thera-P.U!-tic Dose!

The Real Housewives of Miami season comes to a close with Marysol claiming Adriana knee-shamed her all the way to a plastic surgeon, Lisa expertly orchestrating an apology from Larsa to Jodi, and Stephanie shrieking & barking, confirming her role as cast chihuahua. Meanwhile, The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City taste wine, talk soup, confer with a psychic, and bellow about Black Cards, Ben A...

In the second installment of The Real Housewives of Miami reunion, we learned that Julia’s version of hush money is a coffee maker, we saw Adriana’s undergarments as exposed as her bad behavior, and we related deeply to Kiki’s daddy’s issues! Time to consider a new godmother for your dog, alienate all your friends with a game of Private Jet Shoma & Tell, then tune into this week’s A Therapeuti...

In the first installment of the Real Housewives of Miami reunion, Guerdy got too smug, Stephanie was an abomination in green mess, Alexia finally quit Todd, and Julia martyred the MOST!  Time to have your person-sitter hand you a pre-show tequila and sit you down to tune into this week’s A Therapeutic Dose!

This episode of The Real Housewives of Miami had us saying Adria-NAH!, as we learned that Marysol suggested the Wretched Defense and Adriana leaned all the way into that mess. Julia guilted everyone into watching her sing again. And, based on her public speaking skills, Stephanie may very well be early-model A.I.? Even so, we LOVED this season of Miami and will miss this troupe of technicolor mega...

On The Real Housewives of Miami, it’s Art Basel week, and Adriana made us appreciate Chris Rivers’ paintings that didn’t interest us at all at first! But she also made us remember how her defensiveness & paranoia can make her the absolute worst person in the room. Larsa has abandoned her children but adopted a WhIsBe gummy bear. And Kiki is unmasked as the Math-Cake Bandit! Time to abscond int...

On the latest episode of The Real Housewives of Miami, Stephanie & Alexia share their strained sister situations. Lisa & Larsa finally make up. And Guerdy goes to individual therapy! May the rest of the cast follow her lead. Until then (prolly forever), order a Harvey Wallbanger, erase your age equation from a cake, and tune in to this week’s A Therapeutic Dose! 

On this week's episode of The Real Housewives of Miami, we learn that Julia's hairstylists hate her, Kiki's dad discovers he enjoys salmon and meeting his daughter halfway, and Jody has reasonable relationship requests! The rest was one long infomercial for two billionaires' businesses and a blurred-out-boobies teaser for Larsa's OF. Put on your Sea Bands, take five shots of tequila, and set sail...

Lisa is divorced! Larsa is unmoved. Stephanie loves the smell of horse farts! Oh, and she’s also ferally projecting her issues with her sisters onto Marysol & Alexia. And Jesus is a patio umbrella! Time to turn on the stupid party lights in the PJ, find “a shoulder to talk to,” and tune in to this week’s A Therapeutic Dose!

Julia wants some male figures in her boys’ daily lives in Miami, so she’s chosen as their godfathers two guys… in Spain. Lisa finally unfollowed Larsa’s ex. And Kiki & Adriana’s “ratchet” vs “old” insult contest was a stain on American tourists & gave Stephanie a panic attack. Time to poorly doodle a dong, then intentionally put on only clothing with external zippers to “roon” the seats in...

On The Real Housewives of Miami, Adriana took her dog to the Bunny Ranch. Chihuahua Stephanie and Rottweiler Alexia kept picking at the same bone. And a private jet invitation reveals who’s really best friends. Oh, and Marysol’s dad was the Gorton’s Fisherman. Time to interpret “preppy” as p*rn-y as you want, plan your travels around Todd’s birthday, and tune into this week’s A Therapeutic Dose!

On The Real Housewives of Miami, tensions ran so high that the girls’ weekend on the high seas had to happen on two separate yachts! Stephanie thoroughly grossed us out by delighting in designing a separate entrance for her castle staff. Adriana got the drunkest but was also the right-est about the Julia/Guerdy drama. And Dr. Nicole was back on the call sheet and we want more! Time to have one (bo...

The Real Housewives of Miami took Karamo’s instruction to heart and gave us an episode where Julia & Guerdy continued their old fight, Stephanie & Alexia started a new fight, and Ramona & Margee fought ABOUT these fights! With the exception of some moments of sweet reprieve with Tias, kids, goats, and donuts, it was mostly mayhem in Miami. So time to grab a drink from the Rolls‘ center...

Ever wonder what it would look like if Villa Rosa and Casa Bonita had a baby? Well, the Real Housewives of Miami took us there for Alexia’s Narcissist Party that was about Todd, but then not at all about Todd, and eventually just became all about Lisa, as “self-help expert”/”hocus pocus TikToker” Daniel faded into the greenery. We voted Guerdy and Russell Best Couple and Stephanie and her dad, Wor...

On the Real Housewives of Miami, Lisa is inexcusably late… again. And then she’s inexcusably awful, as usual. Stephanie redeems herself from her lame storyline this episode by taking Lisa to the mat for being a disrespectful dumbass. Guerdy gives up on Julia, as do we all. And Alexia prepares to host a Mirror, Mirror On The Internalized-Misogyny party! Time to tie on a toga, count your coconuts, a...

On The Real Housewives of Miami, Guerdy may have decorated for Halloween, but Julia is the resident ghoul-ia. Lisa’s dad has been buried, but her daddy issues remain very much above ground. Kiki is solid gold, Stephanie insists she’s not a gold digger, and Alexia is sleeping with trash. Time to gag on a diaper, crawl into bed with a migraine/Todd, and tune in to this week’s A Therapeutic Dose!

On The Real Housewives of Miami, Preston gracefully sets boundaries, and Larsa tramples all over them. Guerdy investigates reconstructive options for her body, while Alexia explores every destructive relationship option with Todd. And it seems maybe Jody got neck deep in “AC” in Milan? Time to put on some satin pants with no undies, take a shot of sake from a small wooden box, and tune in to this...

The Real Housewives of Miami supersized every second of their supersized premiere! Julia & Martina are new parents! Larsa & Marcus are over. And Alexia & Todd are divorcing… but are also still married, and also secretly dating? Soooo… yeah. Jody’s birthday party tried to tell us “The Meat Made Me Do It,” but Ramona & Margee think the drama might be more a result of daddy issues, da...

It’s only our second ever GUEST-PISODE!! Ramona’s partner in marriage, parenthood, and (most importantly?) her partner in Bravo TV watching, JOSH HIGGINS, joins us to talk through part two of the Summer House reunion! There is consensus that - at least through a therapy-informed lens - Carl rules, Kyle’s a fool, Jesse’s a tool, and Craig is the worst. Also, could the time be coming for Amanda to t...

It’s only our second ever GUEST-PISODE!! Ramona’s partner in marriage, parenthood, and (most importantly?) her partner in Bravo TV watching, JOSH HIGGINS, joins us to talk through part two of the Summer House reunion! There is consensus that - at least through a therapy-informed lens - Carl rules, Kyle’s a fool, Jesse’s a tool, and Craig is the worst. Also, could the time be coming for Amanda to t...