A Star to Steer Her By

Back to the rehash mines, "Enterprise"! First up: Starfleet meets their first energy beings and we recall all the times they're going to have done it better in their future/our past in "The Crossing". After that, Martok shows up to defend Archer in "we have Star Trek VI at home", otherwise known as "Judgment". Also this week: bread, a missing key detail, and Sisko! [timestamps: The Crossing: 01:45...

Starting off the same but going very different places in both episodes this week! First off: is a drifting ship the final resting place of Zephram Cochrane or, just perhaps, an Admiral From the Future's tomb in "Future Tense". After that, it's another false imprisonment story that ALMOST becomes "Con Air" but refuses to be that cool in "Canamar". Also this week: dinosaur kids, got guest?, and Worf...

Warnings UP FRONT: Unfortunately, "Fusion" is important background to the first episode this week, so the events of that come up. Also we're talking Tasha Yar later so her unfortunately-written history is also discussed. ALSO: we throw caution to the wind and spoil the ever-living crap out of "Picard" throughout the blogtivity this week. Like almost from the word GO. So yeah. ANYWAY First up: it's...

Things are heating up on "Enterprise"! First up, a radiation storm is going to cook everyone alive unless they cool their heels with some new alien friends in "The Catwalk". After that, we've been there and done that but now the sun's going to broil Trip alive in "Dawn"! Also this week: avoiding ambiguity, continued familiarity, and Guinan! [timestamps: Catwalk: 01:05; Dawn: 32:54; Guinan: 1:02:25...

Ooh, it's a chilling week on "Enterprise". First up: is a transporter issue turning Hoshi into a g-g-g-ghost in "Vanishing Point"? After that, YOU decide what's more terrifying: how lazy the very familiar plot of "Precious Cargo" is, or the absolutely abysmal acting of its principal guest star! Also this week: dreams are stupid, a season one week, and Lwaxana Troi! [timestamps: Point: 02:35; Cargo...

The solutions this week are such lazy pulls from the writer's behind that calling them deus ex machinas would be an insult to that concept. First up: Archer and Reed are so desparate to not break the nonexistent Prime Directive that they almost get killed until the "Enterprise" crew realizes they have something for that in the trunk in "The Communicator". After that, that old saw Vulcan magic keep...

Simple solutions abound this week! First up, a very lazy "Seven Samurai" clone is wrapped up with no loss of life thanks, in part, to the worst Klingons we've ever met in "Marauders". After that, T'Pol has a complicated past...no, wait, she's definitively good and her quarry explicitly bad in the lazy "The Seventh". Also this week: one last dose of the holidays, bug robberies, and Beverly Crusher!...

The past is back to haunt us this week on "Enterprise" – both recent and not. First up: while searching for a fix for the mine damage from last week, the crew is directed to an automated repair station that seems a bit too good to be true in "Dead Stop". After that, Archer has offended the Kreetassans again (but maybe they have a point this time), but he doesn't care because Porthos isn't doing we...

This week Archer's inability to leave well enough alone drives one plot and is actually pretty integral to solving another. First up: Archer's done some rooting so T'Pol tells an old family tale of cultural contamination in "Carbon Creek". After that: an accident in space has Reed doing his usual "sacrifice me for the good of the ship" schtick and Archer needles him to keep his mind off it in "Min...

How do you wrap up a season one like the one "Enterprise" just had? By suddenly remembering how to write a halfway-decent episode of "Star Trek"! Despite heavily featuring The Temporal Cold War and the entirely obnoxious Daniels we find ourselves pretty happy with the pacing and feeling of actual stakes! What could this mean going forward?! Also this week: too excited about disaster, the temporal...

"Enterprise" has decided to have an arc, and it's about trying to get to Risa! No, really. But there's some hiccups on the way and even more once they get there! First up: Data's Mom is an inspiration to T'Pol but uh-oh she might be bad in "Fallen Hero". After that, Mr. Krabs wants Archer's help against tyranny in "Desert Crossing". Finally, almost everyone's vacation goes awry in "Two Days and Tw...

Fresh off last week's desperate attempts, we've got another bit of stunt-casting and then a really...interesting alien design. First up, the writers were really afraid we missed their subtle metaphor when they invite Archer's old buddy Al to play an evil jailer in "Detained". After that, there was a much easier solution to "Vox Sola" but then the episode would've been 15 minutes long. Also this we...

We have to imagine the conversation at "Enterprise" HQ was something akin to: "OH GOD MAYBE THEY'LL LIKE IT IF WE BRING BACK EVERYTHING THEY LOVE?!" So get ready for canon-bending Ferengi, Ethan Phillips, and Jeffrey Combs in "Acquisition". After that, it's Rene Auberjonois in a semi-remake of a DS9 episode in "Oasis". Also this week: the idiot ball, painting by numbers, and Bill Riker! [Acquisiti...

CONTENT WARNING: The first episode has a not-at-all-subtle sexual assault metaphor in it, so we discuss that a lot. Timestamps below if you need to jump right to the second one. This week, baddies are apparent from the word go in "Enterprise". First up, "Trek" tries to de-monoculture one of its most famous ones when we meet some unique Vulcans in "Fusion". After that, we find out Archer had a pret...

If I had a nickel for every time an episode ended with the same kind of shot this week on SSHB, I'd only have two nickels, but it's weird that it happened twice. First up: continuity comes home to roost as the aftermath of past actions leads to Archer getting himself and T'Pol hostaged in "Shadows of P'Jem". After that: a character study and metanarrative collide into probably the first genuinely...

Not much Trip this week, and maybe there's better links here but this one is more important. First up: no one on "Enterprise" seems to know how evolution actually works in "Dear Doctor". After that, tough luck if you were expecting Porthos, you're just getting Klingons in "Sleeping Dogs". Also this week: no respect from the writers, the whitest man in space, and Pavel Chekov! [timestamps: Doctor:...

You'd find more stakes in a vegetarian restaurant than we're finding in "Enterprise" this week! (cue Data waving his arms comically) But seriously, folks, we don't care. At all. The future might be doomed but the 22nd century is going to be fine in "Cold Front". After that, what SHOULD be the A plot is instead relegated to the backup story about a cake in "Silent Enemy". Also that crackly mic effe...

Meeting a lot of jerks this week on "Enterprise", and no we don't mean more members of the NX-01 crew! First up: a developing alien world is being poisoned by a different, more advanced alien who claims he's just chilling there because he likes the culture and TOTALLY isn't up to no good in "Civilization". After that, some cargo haulers are trying to keep Archer from finding out about their attemp...

For some reason the braintrust at Paramount decided it was worth "celebrating" the fiftieth anniversary of "Star Trek: The Animated Series". To do that, they appear to have scraped together the rejected jokes from every Adult Swim series and South Park and slapped a coat of TAS-style animation on top. Seriously, of the five they churned out, one was good. Which one? Listen to find out! Also this w...

Archer is SO BAD at subtlety and diplomacy, guys. Seriously. Watch as he buys time badly and then declares himself simultaneous King of two civilizations in "The Andorian Incident". After that, nothing will get in the way of his prejudices when Vulcans are hanging around in "Breaking the Ice". Also this week: vampire assignment, puffy poop boots, and Montgomery Scotty! [timestamps: Incident: 01:32...

Descendants are all over the place this week on "Enterprise"! First up, Trip finds out the hard way he's biologically compatible with an alien species in "Unexpected". After that, the "Enterprise" goes looking for a missing Earth colony and finds some rather unexpected residents in "Terra Nova". Also this week: bad safety, bad naming, and Doctor McCoy! [Timestamps: Unexpected: 01:04; Terra Nova: 3...

And we're off! Yes, with the pilot out of the way it's time for "Enterprise" to hit the ground running, and...ah...oh, did they not hear the starting pistol? First up: space is pretty empty and it's making everyone antsy until things get kinda scary in "Fight or Flight". After that: drugs bring out the worst in everyone in "Strange New World". Also this week: everyone is jerks, just stun people, a...

Right! Break time is over, back to the "Trek" mines as we dive face-first into "Enterprise"! But now we're going back to an earlier point in the future as we join Captain Archer and his crew on the first warp-five Starfleet ship taking tentative steps out into the galaxy a century-ish before TOS! A Klingon has crash landed in the titular "Broken Bow", and it's up to the "Enterprise" NX-01 crew to...

We've come around to another anniversary, and as has become tradition we're celebrating with fanfics! But it's also our cap to "Voyager", which we wrapped a mere few weeks ago. So it's one last go with Kathy and crew, many fake folks, and a few fake worlds! What does that mean? Listen to find out! Jake's: 03:33 https://www.tumblr.com/sshbpodcast/727743530759585792/tales-from-the-holodeck-voy-fanfi...

Well, the "Voyager" doc wasn't ready in time for us to cover it at the end of the series, so we went through the shelves and scrounged up "Trekkies", the Denise Crosby–hosted look at "Star Trek" conventions and the fans that attend them! It...certainly has a bias. Also this week: The Match Game, Iowa, and mascots! [cw: brief mention of suicidal ideation] [The Star Trek Adventure: https://www.youtu...