A Bit Fruity with Matt Bernstein

The belief that a mafia of closeted homosexuals exists within the federal government is not a new one. Neither is the concern that the presence of said homosexuals presents a national security blackmail threat. But the “closetocracy” has found renewed interest not on the openly homophobic right, but within parts of the conspiracy-curious left. When Cenk Uygur of the left-wing talk show The Young T...

By the end of 2016, former Fox News anchor Megyn Kelly was a “newly-minted feminist icon” according to Vanity Fair. It was strange but true, if you didn’t look closely. The year prior, Megyn had become the primary focus of presidential hopeful Donald Trump’s sexist ire and helped topple a media dynasty when she came forward as a survivor of Fox chairman Roger Ailes. But the world has changed a lot...

The Boston Globe’s biggest story in 2002 was an earth-shattering expose of child abuse within the Catholic Church. The Boston Globe’s biggest story in 2026 was an earth-shattering expose of a dysfunctional lesbian community in a small town in Massachusetts trying to keep a COVID-conscious, masks-required queer bar financially afloat. It’s true, this story has everything: a co-owner ditching the ba...

A cultural and political earthquake revolving around Ed Sheeran, Macklemore, and P!nk might have felt semi-plausible in 2012, but certainly not in 2026. And yet! After Macklemore called for a free Palestine at Ed’s concert, a disgruntled P!nk took to Instagram to call for apologies and refunds. In a follow-up essay, the 2000s pop icon clarified she does not need a refund, but wants to make one thi...

The homosexual fascist must be savvy, and Milo Yiannopoulos was (at least for a time) among the savviest. But it wasn’t enough. It never is. The flamboyant British provocateur who wormed his way into American politics was never destined for a seat at the winners’ table, because the winners’ table doesn’t even exist. Today, Kat Tenbarge, Matthew Sitman (of the Know Your Enemy podcast) and I chronic...

In 2024, the trans TikTok influencer Jools Lebron graced the world with “very demure, very mindful.” The phrase was lightning in a bottle, and got plastered just about everywhere. Two years and two million followers later, Jools broke the news to her followers: after the lucrative brand deals stopped coming, she needed their help to afford dental surgery. The colossal backlash that ensued reveals...

When Boy George released an AI-generated reggae Zionist fight song last month, I was not shocked. That’s only because the 1980s queer pop icon and “Karma Chameleon” singer quietly directed his ire at me (ME!) a few months earlier. How did such a legendary countercultural figure resort to… whatever this is? Today, we’re telling a bizarre story of fame, crime, geopolitics, and artificial intelligenc...

Lindsey Graham died doing what he loved: fanning the flames of war and hiring queer sex workers while legislating against their basic human rights. What is there to say of an evil gay man who dies in the closet? Lindsey wasn’t the first, and likely won’t be the last. Today, Moira Donegan (of In Bed With The Right) and I perform a psychosexual autopsy on some of America’s worst gays. Good riddance....

Kylie Jenner is selling Meta Glasses that record people without their knowledge. Timothée Chalamet is selling Kalshi gambling addictions to teenage boys. Do a billion-dollar beauty mogul and the most bankable movie star of a generation really have to debase themselves like this? This week, Kat Tenbarge, Ed Ongweso Jr. and I waltz through the recent business exploits of Hollywood’s busiest couple....

Caught on camera fleeing the NBA Finals for his $40 million Hamptons home, Jerry Seinfeld declared: “Palestine doesn’t exist.” It’s hard to imagine someone with a larger repository of goodwill and adoration than the 90s television legend, yet Jerry remains steadfast on his mission to destroy it all. This week, comedy connoisseur Emma Vigeland and I investigate Seinfeld’s growing animosity for the...

Mel Robbins wants to Let You give her your money. The lawyer-turned-self-help guru has made an unfathomable fortune through books, speeches, and most recently, protein smoothies. Mel’s core message to her millions of fans is simple: the only thing standing in your way is you. But as the systems that govern us continue to stratify people across seemingly unmovable barriers of wealth and power, Mel’...

It’s time to dive into one of Canada’s worst exports. Kevin O’Leary a.k.a. “Mr. Wonderful” gained household recognition by performing as a mean venture capitalist on TV. As it turns out, the meanness might be the only honest aspect of his character. Today, Emma and I excavate Kevin’s personal and professional history to reveal a nesting doll of capitalist grifter hell. Grab your $28 avocado toast...

Mallory McMorrow is one of three Democrats running in one of the most hotly contested primary races heading into the 2026 midterms: the Michigan senate race. After I interviewed her progressive opponent, Abdul El-Sayed, Mallory’s team reached out for an interview as well. After a publicized back-and-forth between my camp and hers, we are gathered here today to discuss Mallory’s support for funding...

Tucker Carlson has emerged as one of the most influential voices opposing the U.S. relationship to Israel. He’s also anti-Trump. So is he your friend now? Today, the inimitable Naomi KIein makes her A Bit Fruity debut to explain the Right’s burgeoning realignment, why the Republican successor to Trump could be so much scarier (sorry), and how an inept Liberal establishment made the rise of an anti...

It’s time to podmax. The Internet’s biggest rising star is a 20-year-old from New Jersey named Braden Peters, and he wants your sons to hit their jaws with hammers so they can get girlfriends. Not great! But in my quest to explain Clavicular, I encountered other, bigger problems: a generation of young people who know the American social contract is broken, a generation of older people who don’t ca...

On Monday, an Arkansas grandmother of 10 children flew to Washington D.C. at the behest of DoorDash to deliver the President of the United State two bags of McDonald’s. The stunt was a promotion for the food delivery app, and for Trump’s “No Tax On Tips” policy which allegedly helps workers like DoorDash Grandma save on taxes. As you might imagine, no aspect of the bizarre stunt was what it seemed...

As we teeter on the edge of war, Epstein chaos, and an AI-induced job market collapse, it’s a comfort to know that Democrats are fighting as hard as they can to defeat… Hasan Piker! The online left’s favorite hunk has created a crisis for establishment Democrats, whose allegiance to Israel and corporate interests has become career-threatening (finally!). Today, Michigander and 2026 senate candidat...

On March 21, 2026, as violent tensions escalated in Trump’s illegal war on Iran, the second most-discussed event in the United States was Chappell Roan’s hotel breakfast. What began as a forgettable “controversy” involving celebrities, a security guard, and a fancy hotel in Brazil soon transformed into a political proxy war that feels deeply emblematic of what the Internet has become. Today, Carol...

Last year at the behest of Elon Musk, a group of young men in their 20s with no political experience set out to reduce federal spending by terminating lifesaving public health programs, slashing thousands of science and culture grants, and gutting entire federal agencies. The “DOGE Bros” wreaked havoc on American life — and somehow, reduced federal spending by nothing. Recently, two former DOGE em...

Gavin Newsom, the California governor who’s been seemingly anointed to the throne of the Democratic Party, thinks Democrats should be more “culturally normal.” He thinks we should spend less time talking about pronouns. He won’t tax billionaires, and he’s had approximately four different positions on Israel in the last six weeks. Yet two and half years out from the 2028 election, some inside the p...

Neil Patrick Harris would like to make art that is “apolitical.” Sydney Sweeney “is not a political person.” Jelly Roll is a “dumb redneck” who we shouldn’t want to hear from, but we will be hearing his thoughts on global events “soon.” Ethan Hawke says we shouldn’t seek moral guidance from “a bunch of jet-lagged, drunk artists,” and perhaps he’s right. But at a time when celebrities who were once...

ICE is many things — chief among them, an outgrowth of a seemingly neverending masculinity crisis. The U.S. government has devised a billion dollar strategy to recruit aggrieved young men into ICE with the promise of giving them a purpose: to “restore the homeland.” And their masculinity. The results have been devastating. A parallel crisis of manhood is unfolding in the form of looksmaxxers, a bo...

Ashley St. Clair dropped out of college to become a full-time conservative influencer. Five years later, she was pregnant with Elon Musk’s child. Within months, the weight of the politics Ashley built her career on collapsed. Elon publicly disparaged Ashley and reneged on his fatherly responsibilities, and the influencer who once shamed single mothers on Fox News was one herself. Today, June (or J...

Candace Owens’s daily livestreams have more viewers than Fox News, CNN, and MSNBC combined. The woman who less than a decade ago was a liberal blogger in New York City is now one of the most powerful voices representing — and tearing apart — the American Right. Her latest and most successful act is that of a professional conspiracy theorist, spinning webs around Brigitte Macron’s gender, Charlie K...

When Nicki Minaj stepped on stage in Phoenix, Arizona, with one hand clasping Erika Kirk and the other waving to a crowd of white supremacists, even I was shocked. We’ve known the Queen of Rap to be many unsavory things: an insecure egomaniac, a steadfast defender of predators, an obsessive poster (she has my solidarity on that one). But “fascist propagandist” I did not see coming. Today, Olayemi...