30 Going On 13

SORRY but we're still here!! And having FUN. From working out in the basement to the saddest B-side on Pink Floyd's The Wall and unpacking post-trip depression to wondering why Italy doesn't have OHIP but for pasta. We make the case for Legally Blonde as a genuinely perfect movie, revisit the idea that a monarch butterfly may have cursed us six years ago, and dive into Liv's deeply concerning obse...

In this episode we discuss the era of life where you'd seek out sadness, breaking the fourth wall with yourself, how May is liminal space, not caring about comfy clothes in the 90s, the origin story of this movie, how cute the lil evil guys are, bball players giving it their all, which tune are you, if Tweety bird and the mouse are too little to play in the NBA, and SO MUCH MORE!!! Thanks for list...

In this episode we discuss our allegiance to war vets and animal vets, needing a family calendar, all the attacks on Hil Duff, the name Gordon Bombay, that song from every 90s movie, the creepy truth about ducks, the issue of whether or not someone is in the Mighty Ducks school district, stopping at beard central station with the relationship between Bombay and the mom, the ludicrous nature of Bom...

In this episode we discuss not caring about the Jim Carey conspiracy, Punch the monkey, the ANTM doc and hot ice cream, bedazzling as a hobby, how much this thing is DRIPPING in sex, Maddy’s lore with Peter Pan, the Woodstockian nature of 90s kids movies, whether they’re called Chelsea dogs, how much this kid’s room is pure goon fuel, not loving Julia’s Tink, the shock at finding out Dustin Hoffma...

In this episode we discuss the vulnerability of having a birthday, punishing vegetarians with carrots, Matthew Morrison’s experience of 9/11, Justin Long as a love interest, the sexualization of Herbie, the perversion of the Ozempic theme song, the dark night of the soul that is “getting dropped by Bass Pro”, Wink Yahoo in our dms, whether Herbie's in the Epstein files, using cars as a metaphor fo...

In this episode we discuss Maddy's medical credentials, all the classic medical archetypes, the hit piece by Ashley Tisdale that's rocking the nation, the irksome nature of Hil Duff singing about bj's, having a "face for medicine", the freakishness of a man with a full head of hair, how nurses are the backbone of society, doctors salaries in the 90s, wanting a doc with a perma-iced coffee in hand,...

In this episode we discuss a massive scandal rocking the Terry's Chocolate Orange world, what the deal is with Toffifee, using Ferrero Roche to psychologically terrorize someone, knowing all the textures from Muppet Christmas Carol by heart, mixing family annihilators and terminal children with Christmas, the complexity of the character of "George", pigtail catheters, how every time a muppet frown...

In this episode we discuss psychological disorder associated with chasing ping pong balls and buses, moms always putting Cornation Street on the tv, how this show smacks of being a Canadian production, golden papyrus font of the 90s, being a young Canadian yearning for American Hollywood, the invention of bangs and the industrial hair revolution, the pornographic tone, the era of feminism as just...

In this episode we discuss the Amber Alert that’s been out for us (oops), commercials for dementia that ruin your whole day, being a piggybacking troll on Ghost Tok, giving the 3rd P name sister the name Phoebe, the concept of an audition recipe, a shark-cuterie board, the humiliation of being found dead mid-spell, pinot noir penne, being a nepo witch, and SO MUCH MORE!!! Thanks for listening and...

In this episode we discuss how the city is overrun with 50ft skeletons, the cheugy-ness of pumpkin spice, catfishing the youth, an anthropological study of “say cheese”, a conspiracy theory about Shoppers, the characters that everyone knows in a town, the number 1 rule of PR - get ahead of it, the atrocity of saying cheddar instead of cheese, the iconic skeletons-at-the-bbq tableau, going through...

In this episode we discuss Maddy dancing with her substitute teacher, the statute of limitations for spoiling the catfish doc, TIFF, Liv getting bullied by the youth at school, having a baby ma’am or sir, Snack Of The Week feat. Jaffa Cakes, the character archetype of “surly man with a dark passenger”, the reason he’s called Dr. House (spoiler alert: it’s horrifying), having to act out a medical e...

In this episode we discuss the catfish doc sweeping the nation, cartwheels as a sign of personality disorder, body fluid rorschach tests on doctor paper, how daring your friends to eat a rotten burger is the perfect crime, making twins circus freakshows in the 90s, what we would do if we had a teen angel, and SO MUCH MORE!!! Thanks for listening and we'll catch you on the flip-phone! 

In this episode we discuss the latest culinary mad scientist creations at the CNE, the process of converting to a life of press-on nails, finding a human vs. acrylic nail in your food, all the brazen Legally Blonde rip-offs, millionaires like Kaley Cuoco stealing commercials from broke actors, the high of getting a Cinnabon, the psychological effect of getting cast as the fat dowdy woman, having a...

In this episode we discuss Maddy’s sick as hell GooGoo Dolls experience, Billy S level lyrics, Crush Orange Zero, when gum becomes mealy, resorting to snacking on a 1950’s lollipop, some Biscoff updates, going through an alien phase, our personal UFO encounters, having a zhjing ne sais quoi, Mulder and Scully wanting/needing to bang, using your sister’s alien abduction to get laid, and SO MUCH MOR...

In this episode we discuss the Vans Warp Tour era of music, the current hierarchy of energy drinks, getting high and sending late night emails to equestrian clubs, Annabelle's new legal guardian, the nostalgic comfort of 2000s Ashton Kutcher, not being able to get your laugh dink up, stoner movies being for kids, the name Christie Boner, low budget movies aka Lobubus, repetition as the ultimate co...

In this episode we discuss the experience of going to the mall, the murder allegations against Annabelle the doll, investing in a pool flottie, the dangers of an inflatable ring, the revelation that fig newtons are made of fig, linking arms banana-style as a kid, dirty costumes, the chemistry between B1 & 2, the tragic figure of Rat In The Hat, the quintessential back-to-school shoe shopping exper...

In this episode we discuss mandatory running for school, the natural transition into Arnold in adulthood, putting miniature zen gardens in your mom’s stocking, a new pop (rock) of the week, centipedes invading the home, car-based urban legends, yassifying the Frizz, entering Arnold without his consent, the bus being a dog basically, being obsessed with breaking a Guinness world record, your whole...

In this episode we discuss the discovery of all the Tubi stars in our midst, the antipasto scandal rocking the nation, getting rocked and rammed at Weird Al, a POW featuring Fanta Pineapple, Larry and Maurice as the OG iconic duo, the little phrase that captured the imaginaysh of every kid, teaching kids to hate landlords, a children’s story about a sexual criminal, forcing a kid to take dog doodo...

In this episode we discuss how everyone and their mother is getting botox, getting moles removed, pool kids vs. non-pool kids, advertisers making poop hot, Storybook Weaver & Cross Country Canada, cannibals eating boot leather, another banger POW featuring Cove, the joy of sprinkler days, The Hair of George, the infamous B44 Skydome sleepover, school radio, improv and SO MUCH MORE!!! Thanks for li...

In this episode we discuss training to lucid dream, the new 15 inch Capri Sun, Liv’s current state of psychosis, the humiliation of reading text msgs in court, Maddy's discovery of the whole Labubu thing, POW feat. Peace Tea, the chalk on Bubble Tape, decor in the 90s aka the worst era for design, decorative plates, sexy leg lamps, dastardly colour combos, tables made of dollhouses, putting everyt...

In this episode we discuss fear of finding out aka fofo, the millennial pause, the Zeddy ferris wheel, Sears, the solemn tone of Instacart ads, a scary Arthur story, hating sparkling water, propaganda from Big Milk, a s'mores life hack, how annoying camp fire kid Gary is, regretting not being a lifeguard, teaching kids to read their contracts, fish in bags and SO MUCH MORE!!! Thanks for listening...

In this episode we discuss the men wilding out in our tiktok comments, Maddy’s experience living The Suite Life, getting gaslit by housekeeping, the flavour “icy”, shirley temples as a gateway drink, America’s sweetheart John Ritter, young Kaley Cuoco and her whale tail, Liv’s twin sis Eva Amurri, soft tv dads working as writers, big capitalism pushing teens to double lunch, a genius revelation ab...

In this episode we discuss the Lancome Juicy Tube ads with all the 2000s crushes, lip glosses with cranks, how commercials used to be fun, YouTube vids of raking sand filled with dildos, a POW review of Rubicon, being self-conscious about our knowledge of primate species, the anxiety induced by the trapeze on Math Circus, the ethics of George having sex, and SO MUCH MORE!!! Thanks for listening an...

In this episode we discuss the Royal Match celebrity ad epidemic, Momtok, stinky ice cubes, a review of the Tim Horton’s Infusr, the iconic schoolyard romp of Scotty Doesn’t Know, sex comedies as the OG pornog, the lip ring version of Matt Damon, the depiction of Europe in film, the ethics of showing teen bobos, reliving old MSN convos, the atrocity of a sex scene in a confessional and SO MUCH MOR...

In this episode we discuss how we’re the adult snackboiz podcast, the ponpon style of shirt, the discovery of a downbeat zhjing, the power of a sunglass+ hat combination, the funhouse effects on a YouTube watch, 40 year olds pretending to be teens, women in stem but make it fashion, the beauty of a made up name, wanting a diary with a kill switch, a no-kids condo, and SO MUCH MORE!!! Thanks for li...