2 Gleeps

Everyone on Earth has been waiting for this episode...well...here it is you freaks. We talk about Hamsters and how to keep them fed and fit. Also, stop domesticating you pets.   This is where there would normally be links to our emails, but you are actually not allowed to email us about this episode, so I'm not even going to put them here.

Have you ever wondered what the experts do behind closed doors, what Home Depot is like on a management level, and the secrets behind the Rochester Minnesota exclusive restaurant Pannekoeken? Well, that is extremely specific, but oddly enough this episode will actually answer all of those questions.   Why is Jeff Bezos depressed? Why does Elon Musk smell? Is Bill Nye actually a science guy? Is Wil...

Today is all about getting banned from the library, but for what reason would the esteemed hosts of this podcast possibly get banned? It's something you will have to listen to in order to find out. Also, all of it is true! Probably. Maybe.   Let us know if you'd like to have the ability to shield your ants! We are having a clearance sale on stupid powers! 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com   Maybe you would...

We are not only talking about memory wipes (The greatest invention since panty vending machines), but we also discuss the driving force behind all wars. Also Shia The Beef and parcheesi.   Do you want to send Noah words of encouragement of discouragement over his plans to kill himself at 47,000 downloads? 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com   Do you have some cool fictional foods to add to Colton's cool nonfi...

What is the worst talking animal and how would you talk yourself out of prison?   Do you like Peanut MnutM's? 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com   Do you like Walllnuts instead? tgleepsdotorg@gmail.com  

This section was cut from the last episode for some reason, but I figured people would still want to listen to it. Just because "it is a waste of time" and "it goes on for too long" doesn't mean it should've been deleted. Also, this episode is not optional and is in fact mandatory listening.

We've got some new noodle inventions for Chef-Boy Ardee if he wants them. We also build a Fortnite island and kick some Keeeeeeebleeeeerrel elves. Last but not least, we contemplate the age old question "Would you kick a dog to save it?"   Do you have a cool Native American name? Please send it to this email. 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com   Hey, what time is it there? tgleepsdotorg@gmail.com  

Mental tic-tac-toe is the best thing since pre-diced bread, but are we just scratching the surface? If we look down yonder horizon, mayhap when can find our Magnum Au Pair.   That was a typo, I meant "Opus". 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com   But a Magnum Au Pair would be pretty cool too. tgleepsdotorg@gmail.com  

This episode has only a few main themes. First, Baby Plane. There really doesn't seem to be much else I need to say about that, it's pretty self explanitory. Second, John Quinoa...Cuinone...Kiwipenis. He's beating people up because it makes him feel alive. Also, who is the coolest Nazi?   If you had a tube city, what would you do? 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com   If you want to learn CPR, just ask. It's...

This is the episode where we talk about our TV show idea that is not a rip off of Punk'd. We also mention Shark Tank I think...I dunno. If your heart can't handle this, maybe you should skip this episode.   Do you think you are good enough to be on our TV show? Send us your audition tapes of being kicked in the balls. 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com   Auditions are only open to persons 18+ unless given ex...

We're talkin' peaks, we're talkin' penguins, we're talkin' Joe Pesci's robber accomplice loves getting hit in the balls. Colton's got a pickup line, and a name for his son.    If you knew what KFC stood for before this episode, prove it. 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com   If you have seen days of our lives and want to hear us talk about it, prove it. tgleepsdotorg@gmail.com  

What is the point of answering questions from the internet if we are going to talk about murdering deer instead?   Would you like a copy of The Healthiest Way To Kill A Deer, Though? The rate is personalized per person, so we are going to have to discuss it 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com   Do you know of any healthy ways to kill deer? Maybe we can add it to the book! We won't even credit you either! Isn'...

This episode has quite a few topics, so let me try to break them down for you. We do some talking about earcholocation and bigfeets. We figured out that Dr. Seuss caused the holocaust, how Boo-Boo the  bear was named, Noah's phone number is (507) 993-7329, everyone on the school bus makes fun of Carlos, and we get another email address I guess. ...Also, Harriet Tub, Man or Myth?   Do you know wher...

Why does everyone blame elephants for 9/11? Who was Columbus trying to impress? What are Galileo Galilei's biggest foibles? Maybe we are about to tell you, if you'd be a little patient.   Did you live longer then Gal Gal? Tell me how. I want to live forever, please. 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com  

This is a new format of bonus episode where we answer preset questions directly from the internet because we are cool and original. Also, I think we only actually answered one question. This is part one of however many I think are worth posting of us reading questions.   Do you know anything about the disappearance of Jodi Huisentruit or other 5/10 news anchors? Tell us so we can take credit. 2gle...

It's time you here the official story of Noah's arc and Santa's ark. There is a heated exchange of words about small pox blankets, and we talk about a lot of movies (so this is an official spoiler warning)   If you or a loved one has been diagnosed with PTCD or other emotional trauma involving Filipino men, you may be entitled to financial compensation. 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com  

Now, this is a story for all that I know. Only one of the hosts played tic-tac-toe. And I'd like to take a minute -- so don't make a fuss -- to tell you about the woman at the back of the bus.   Did you get that it was supposed to be to the tune of Fresh Prince of Bel-Air? 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com  

Do you like goober peas? Do you live tornado alley? Do you have tub of milk? Do you know splodgeuswallow? Do you hate Dr. Seuss? Scooters? This and more! But mostly just this...in today's episode.   Do you know any hidden secrets about the seed vault? Tell us please. 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com  

Don't fire until you see the greens of their eggs.   2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com  

Colton teaches Noah about boats, phones, ears, bananas, and lawn care. Also be careful because the night stalk and Edgar's pack might get you while you sleep   If you know anything about the Alamo, we are willing to trade information with you about the secrets of the Midwest. 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com  

Does anybody remember that movie "Living Dark" from like 10 years ago? No? Just me? Well this episode has nothing to do with that. It's just a title that loosely fit with the theme...Just listen to the episode and you'll get it   Wait, you actually do remember "Living Dark: The Story of Ted the Caver"? let's talk about it if you want. 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com  

Just read the description of Side A, it's the same episode, but the second half. Today we learned why Cuban cigars are so good, and we learned about the prisoner of Pakistan.   Do you hate us because we just casually assumed that everyone listening knows what volksgemeinshaft is? Yell at us here 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com  

This is a crazy little bonus episode about an ancient critique, and Colton's suicide in his past life as the most earnest Ernest.   Let us know if you were a famous person in the before time. 2gleepsdotorg@gmail.com   Also, I think I'm legally obligated to put the phone number to a suicide help line in the description, but I don't know it off the top of my head. It is also too much work to open up...

This episode was so large that the entire thing wouldn't fit on one MIDI file. Luckily this is a two sided tape, and there are no other plans to do anything with the other side. Also, we talk about IQ and pneumonia guns.   It turns out the really tall building in India that Colton was thinking about was actually the Burj Khalifa, he is just really dumb, and thought Dubai was in India. If you still...

This is easily the scariest episode that has ever been recorded. Get ready, because you're going to be begging to pee your pants after you hear about Colton's neighbors.   If you have a story that will actually makes us shiver our timbers, don't hesitate to tell us. If you can make either of us poop a little because of how spooky your story is, I will actually Venmo you USD $5. 2gleepsdotorg@gmail...