12S4E: The 12 Steps for Everyone

Denise and Jackie discuss how they approached the run-up to the election and the importance of staying positive in times of uncertainty. The Serenity Prayer is great for extra support. Jackie shares the techniques she is using to calm her elevated anxiety. It’s all in the breath! Denise then goes into her experience of asking for a sign from her brother and receiving it in a surprising way during...

Content Warning: This episode discusses suicide and may be distressing for some listeners. Denise and Jackie reflect on their first in-person meeting, which started awkwardly but became fluid as the ice melted. They’re so happy to have brought to life a welcoming, neutral, and free space for people to attend, share, and feel heard. The meeting was one of the many commitments Denise has been juggli...

Denise shares her last days in the hospital together with her grandmother. While it was heavy and emotional, of course, she explains why she did not feel depleted by the grief. Denise and Jackie discuss the importance of telling the people you love that you love them and the different ways of doing so. Jackie talks about saying goodbye to her grandma while at a wedding and recent mental health upd...

Denise and Jackie jump right into Jackie’s ADHD diagnosis history and possible signs from her childhood that she had ADHD. They then turn to the upcoming holiday season and the social anxiety often accompanying celebratory gatherings. New situations, in general, can summon socially anxious feelings in even the most outgoing people. Denise shares a recent experience attending a new meeting, reflect...

Denise and Jackie go in on connection. Denise shares her joyous experience at Godmothers Bookstore, learning from and being in the presence of amazing, powerful women. A part of the joy was from being in a high-functioning third space. As the presidential election draws closer, Denise organizes a get-together with friends to write postcards to swing states, simultaneously creating a connecting act...

As the seasons start to shift, so do Denise and Jackie. The pair discuss the upcoming election season, experiences of grief, and Jackie’s ADHD diagnosis. With the bumpy month of August behind them, election season looms. This is a friendly reminder to everyone listening to vote! While Denise and Jackie digress that they don’t have as much time as they did during the last election, which was mid-pa...

After getting a new depression and anxiety prescription in the last episode, Jackie follows up with how she is adjusting. She’s started to make a great effort to get out of the house to be with her friends and shares a strategy she’s using to do that. Meanwhile, Denise has been busy helping her other daughter move, juggling new changes at work, and organizing a sober retreat. This year’s retreat w...

As Denise juggles a hectic schedule and prepares to host a sober retreat, Jackie continues to feel not okay. They discuss the infinite shapes anxiety and depression can take in people and how it defies logical sense. Jackie shares her recent experience of surrendering and asking for help, making doctor’s appointments, and switching medication. There are a lot of factors to consider when switching...

Jackie talks about her recent experience of realizing she needed additional help, selecting a new therapist, signing up for mental health coaching, and obtaining a psychiatrist referral. While taking action is a great first step, that doesn’t mean it feels easy.  Denise shares her experiences of seeking help. For her, the waiting game is incredibly tedious and, sometimes, offputting. But ther...

For Jackie, summer brings sunny melancholy and big birthday feelings. This year is particularly rough as she acclimates to a changing friend group. Denise finds the birthday season ideal for auditing how aligned her intentions are with her reality, acknowledging, however, that she often has unrealistic expectations for herself.  A forever pro to attending meetings for Denise is the reassuring...

Denise shares how she maintains her long-standing friendships, many of whom she met through AA. Friendships as a sober person going to meetings are especially important because you become a part of a supportive community and feel welcomed time and time again. Jackie and Denise discuss navigating gossip, secrets, and building trust within friend groups. Remember, words have consequences! Jackie sha...

In this current season of financial stress, Jackie is not feeling OK. A lack of financial freedom coupled with grim healthcare options is feeling heavy. In the midst of a cost-of-living and housing crisis, anything beyond our basic needs, like therapy, can feel superfluous.  For the first time in a while, Jackie joined Denise at a Twelve Step Meeting. She recalls the cultural norms and ritual...

Denise and Jackie are back! And they’ve got the blues. They share the highlights and lowlights from their recent trip to Japan, process in real time what they learned from the experience, and offer their strategies for working through depression. Traveling has a funny way of bringing things up, and the duo’s time in Japan was no exception. Denise shares that her travel stress starts as soon as she...

So much can happen in a day! One of the 12 Step Program’s popular adages, “one day at a time,” can really feel like too long for Jackie. Instead, she finds that sometimes, focusing solely on primal needs, one after the other, one minute at a time, can work better.  Denise and Jackie then each share what’s worked and not worked for pulling themselves out of the dumps. For Jackie, she’s still d...

First, Denise shares how a huge recent work event unfolded in Catalina and how she returned to center amidst the ups and downs. Jackie also experienced a rough week dealing with job rejection and coming to terms with her feelings about living in LA. By focusing on her needs in the present moment, one at a time, she is steadily working her way through the discomfort. One way Jackie has been coping...

Denise and Jackie discuss the “poopeh” incident, moving through uncertainty, and communicating their needs before an upcoming trip. First, Jackie shares a stressful story about what should have been a nice Saturday cycle with her dog that turned out to be a “poopeh” nightmare. She reflects that while she wants to do as much with her aging dog as possible, she also needs to keep in mind the rock me...

Denise and Jackie talk about situations that make them feel “itchy,” developing an Emergency Protocol mini workshop, addressing resentments, and using the steps to move forward. Starting off, Denise and Jackie talk about their updates on their new podcast studio and give thanks to those who helped them create their space and also navigate life using their protocol by taking steps back, finding the...

Denise and Jackie share their COVID Christmas experience, Jackie’s Saturn Return, and taking action to find the ideal lifestyle for you. First, Jackie and Denise reflect on Christmas in the Freed family… featuring COVID-19. Both co-hosts share their experiences and feelings that came along with being sick during the holidays. This spirals into a conversation about how 2023 went for both Jackie and...

Denise and Jackie discuss two big amends, The Promises, and personal growth on the other side of resistance.  First, Jackie and Denise reflect on big moments in 2023. Jackie shares two big amends from wedding and tax season and the emotion around doing the “hard, but right, thing.” Then, Jackie and Denise share the history of a decades-old Freed Christmas Eve tradition and reflect on the guil...

Denise and Jackie detail their time at a corporate retreat, the process of navigating addictive behaviors, and everyday delights. First, Denise and Jackie update listeners on the past few weeks and their updated episode cadence. This includes Denise’s social capital depletion following Thanksgiving #2.  Then, Denise and Jackie dive into their experience at a corporate retreat — which featured...

In this episode, Denise and discuss the question, “How do you not drink?” They acknowledge the willingness to make changes to support mental and/or physical wellness and provide tips and tools for the feelings that may arise in response.   First, Denise and Jackie acknowledge the heaviness swirling around the world. Denise shares how she has spent 37 years of sobriety building a “Black B...

Emergency Protocol explores the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) in a way that is accessible to people who aren't addicted, and with gentler and less patriarchal language that still captures the essence of the work. In this episode, Denise and Jackie recap and review each of the 12 steps and share lessons and reflections they've picked up along the way.     First, the moth...

Today, Denise and Jackie explore the last step in the 12 Steps Reimagined, Step 12, an active choice of being present in response to previous steps. A lot of work has transpired in steps 1–11, so this is a time where leaning into a spiritual practice of love is part of stepping into something bigger.  They begin by sharing details and reflections from their two-week family trip to Denmark and...

Today, Denise and Jackie explore Step 11, an active choice of being present in response to previous steps: “We welcome mindfulness, grace, and gratitude into our thoughts and prayers.”   Moving forward is only possible if agency is recognized in order to accept things and people as they are, but also put up boundaries where needed in our individual lives. That’s where Step 11 comes in — as an...

Today, Denise and Jackie unpack Step 10, a culmination of the previous steps to encourage self-awareness and steady growth: "We maintain a daily practice of reflection, amends, and forgiveness." Recovery is an ongoing journey all about refinement and healing. It's like peeling back layers of an onion, and sometimes you might view things differently than you did a year ago or get out of sync with y...