Free Legal Advice

It's important for children to be bused out into the woods and made to sleep in tents for a week. And if they happen to learn how to make a macramé plant hanger, even better. What I'm saying is, camp is incredibly important, and this episode relates beloved and definitely not traumatic stories about this crucial institution.

Some musical instruments are better than others, and those of us who play these blessed machines are clearly superior to the rest of you rags. We here at Free Legal Advice have taken it upon ourselves to guide you along the proper path of noise-making.

Superfans: Why, though? Could we not? Let's not.

If you are reading this, then you owe us $19.95. Make checks payable to "Slush fund". Got the check all written out? Good. Now kindly pay us the $5.00 payment-handling payment.

Without the Free Legal Advice podcast to provide guidance, who knows what state the world would be in today? This week we offer listeners a peek behind the curtain, and let them in on all of the totally real and not fake emails beseeching us for advice that we receive on a daily basis.

As difficult as it is to believe, even WE have made mistakes from time to time, and this episode will right all of those wrongs.

It's definitely still Christmas time, and you know what that means: Bizarre, unnecessary Christmas specials! And we here at the Free Legal Advice podcast know a thing or two about being bizarre, being unnecessary, and being totally chronologically appropriate.

The long-awaited episode is here. Unfortunately, this really IS as sophisticated as we can get. Send your Pulitzer Prizes to freelegaladvicepodcast@gmail.com

Sometimes in life, things are clear. You know exactly what you want and what you need to do to get it. Things are nice and simple. Other times, things are also exactly like that, only you wait two decades for some reason before you actually get around to doing it. This episode relates stories of the latter kind.

In this episode, our heroes relate painful tales in which deeply-held beliefs were revealed to be false. I ask you, dear listener: If we can't trust rappers from 30 years ago, who CAN we trust?

Isn't it silly to seemingly define your entire life through one brand, or one small, weird thing? I sure think so, as I sit here in my Hugo Boss shirt, Hugo Boss jeans, Hugo Boss socks, Hugo Boss ascot, Hugo Boss typing gloves, and Hugo Boss typing hat. Also, be sure to stick around at the end for some random nonsense I had no other place for! Sent from my iBoss

In what is surely a world first, the hosts of this fine audio program break new ground by relating humorous tales from unpleasant jobs they have held. Who knew that work could be a source of comedy?

We're doing the lord's work in this episode. Literally, because we're your new lords. Might want to brush up on your groveling.

Okay, hear me out: I know this is not the episode sequel you were hoping for. But sometimes sequels are better than the original! Like The Empire Strikes Back, or... probably other examples! And this sequel arrived just in time for the holidays! How many movies do THAT?

What sort of things do we do the hard way? Apparently this week the answer is, "making jokes on a podcast." There might still be a few in there, though, stuck in the crevices.

I swear to holy hell, this is not what it looks like. There's a perfectly reasonable explanation for everything. At least, I really hope you believe that.

Get ready to be scared maybe, or something, because this is definitely a ten minute audio file, I tell you what. Sure is.

Here on The Guy Show, we provide only the manliest, most men-centric man topics. And what could be manlier than cars, one of the most common forms of long-distance transportation in the world, regardless of gender? Nothing. Nothing whatsoever.

Sometimes trivial things become unreasonably important, and this podcast chronicles those metamorphoses. It chronicles the shit out of them.

Here is another podcast. It contains 12% of your daily vitamins and minerals and shit. It was produced in a facility that also manufactures the question, "What would you do if you didn't have to work?", so consumers with special dietary restrictions should consult their physician before handling.

In what will surely go down as their most insightful topic yet, the brothers discuss... phrases they use? Really? Well, maybe it's funny anyway.

Are you psychologically crippled by the various apocalyptic crises currently speeding humanity toward an ignominious end? Well, worry no more, stupid! The answers to all the world's problems are contained within this handy, travel-size podcast!

The English vs. the French. Cats vs. dogs. Mr. Pibb vs. Mello Yello. These are indisputably the greatest rivalries in world history. But there are other, lesser, rivalries to recount, and in this episode our hosts do just that.

What makes a dad cool? Sunglasses? A backwards baseball cap? Driving you to school with the T-top down? These answers, and more, in this week's episode. Well, not more. Just the answers.

Everything you need to know, you will learn from this podcast. Who needs all that slop they teach you in school?