No Justice No Peace: The Broken System story of XoAlex

Traveling these days is different. I always thought Alex and I would be taking vacations together after investing every penny I had into the family court system. Instead I travel to see his Plaque in the DEA Museum of all the lives lost to fentanyl poisoning. The system steals your joy, your plans and we rarely got to do anything while we were going through failures of the family court system. Thi...

I had the honor of meeting Damon Martinez who is currently running for office for Bernalillo County District Attorney in Albuquerque, New Mexico. The current prosecutor in office has been giving too many plea deals and not holding criminals accountable for victimizing our community. There is no justice for victims in Albuquerque, and the criminal is treated as the victim speaking from my own perso...

I went to the Lost Voices of Fentanyl Rally September 2023 and met other parents and family members who have lost a loved one to fentanyl poisoning. Bruce Guthrie had the sadness in his eyes that every parent who has lost a child has. We were waiting in line to do an interview with Real Voices of America when we shared our losses. Cody was only 29 years old and was also Bruce’s only son. He passed...

During grief your life can go off course and you have to keep your vision in focus because people will try to distract you and tell you to move on and forget about your child. I choose to never forget his memory and educate others of the things I wasn’t aware of before he passed. If his story can save a life I will forever share him. His 19th birthday would have been on April 5th. He was my Angel...

Erase the stigma, New Mexico needs to get rid of the stigma on our youth. Our youth need us more than ever right now. Labeling someone and bullying them to their death is not ok. Our youth go through soo much at school and social media and need more support. It is not ok to start rumors about someone when they miss school. His school was aware why he was out of the hospital for a month and a half....

With February approaching, I feel foggy when these anniversaries approach and unbearable emotions will hit your heart and you fall to the floor as if someone knocked the wind out of you. This will be the 2 year anniversary on February 28, 2024 already. Yes, already almost 2 years but it feels like everyday for me. Alex passed away on February 28th, 2022 and the first year was a blur, soo many peop...

Approaching the new year comes with soo many emotions. Every year, you look forward to a new year and new resolutions. This was the second new years without Alex physically home. I cherish the memories of the new years we did get to spend together. Going into 2024, I never thought my son wouldn't be here. We would talk and laugh about the future on how he was going to be a rapper and I was going t...

The Holidays are very different now. This will be the second Christmas without Alex physically here. The First Christmas without him was soo hard, the second one is even harder. I felt like an alien last year around people who didn't understand my grief. This year I am spending Christmas cherishing memories of Alex and making him a red velvet cake. Holidays were a time that brought our family toge...

After the shock wears off and you start to see clearly. You can see the clear picture of everyone. This episode was hard to see the betrayals my son went through just a month before he passed away. His heart was broken and he was lied to at the weakest time of his life. Now his funeral makes more sense as to why there were certain comments made about his death and the guilt that many hold knowing...

After the state of shock and denial wear off. Next is the stage of emotions coming to realization that your loved one is forever physically gone. I still wait for alex to get home but I now know that he will never physically walk through his bedroom door again. It’s hard to learn how to live with all these emotions and talking and advocating really help. Fentanyl Awareness week starts with a movie...

This was an emotional trip to as I saw my son for the first time in the museum on The Faces of Fentanyl Wall. I felt like I was in a fog until I walked through the doors and could feel my heart drop to my knees. I felt soo weak like It really hit me that my son is really not here and this is my mission to advocate for him now and our youth. I met a lot of amazing people and shared Alex story with...

During Grief and Trauma you learn how to conquer the waves of emotions by talking and confiding in others, however you have to be very careful who to trust when you are blinded by the fog of grief. The First year was the hardest, then one day you wake up and the shock starts to wear off. You realize your child is physically never coming back again. People will abandon you at your weakest and take...

The first episode was very emotional to record but I did this in honor of my son Alexander Landon aka XoAlex. His story is part of KeepNMalive and I want to share his story with our youth and families to know they are not alone. Alex was my only child my precious babyboy. I never thought I would lose him especially at age 16. If you or someone you know has lost a child or someone to fentanyl poiso...