Do You Feel That? | A Couples Intimacy & Sex Podcast

Scott has completed Ironman triathlons. He has a Master's degree in Performance Psychology. He's spent years coaching hockey players to stop focusing on outcomes and stay locked into process and plan. And he thinks most couples approach sex exactly the way a beginner approaches their first race: get to the finish line as efficiently as possible. In Episode 49, Scott and Brittney take on the finish...

No frameworks. No deep emotional excavation. Just seven things genuinely worth adding to your intimate life — and one shameless plug at the end. In Episode 48, Scott and Brittney each own specific items on a curated list of physical, sensory, and psychological additions to the bedroom that most couples have never tried and at least one that's going to make you wonder why nobody told you about it s...

Your fantasies are not random. They are not guilty secrets. They are not confessions. They are coded language — your mind's most creative attempt to give you access to the emotional experiences you've been reaching for your whole life. In Episode 47, Scott and Brittney draw on the work of Esther Perel — psychotherapist, bestselling author, and one of the most original voices on desire alive — spec...

Scott wants to try mutual masturbation. Brittney is hesitant. Neither of them has done it yet and rather than pretend otherwise, they decided to make that honesty the episode. In Episode 46, Scott and Brittney tackle one of the most commonly cited intimate experiences couples are curious about and one of the least acted upon. Scott represents the eager partner — genuinely excited by what the resea...

Most couples have been together for years and their partner still doesn't know exactly what turns them on. Not because they don't care. Because nobody ever gave either of them the language for it. In Episode 45, Scott and Brittney introduce the Sexual Self-Portrait — a User Manual for how you're actually wired. They each walk through their own completed portrait live, across nine essential section...

What's actually playing in the bedroom? Today Scott and Brittney answer that completely. In Episode 44, they share the full evolution of their intimacy music journey: from the early classics like Norah Jones, John Legend, Lana Del Rey, and 90s R&B, all the way to the four highly specific playlists they use today — each one designed for a different mood, a different kind of encounter, and a dif...

Most couples want to try dirty talk. Most couples never do because they don't know where to start and they're terrified of feeling ridiculous. In Episode 43, Scott and Brittney fix that. This is Dirty Talk 101: the psychology of why it works, the four styles and what each one sounds like, a practical step-by-step progression from complete beginner to genuinely confident, and the honest conversatio...

Scott and Brittney are in a rut. Work, kids, life — all of it has been filling the space where intimacy used to live. And they're naming it publicly because they know they're not alone. In Episode 42, they share a 7-Day Intimacy Reset — a gentle, progressive plan for couples who feel stuck. Not a dare game. Not a challenge. A reset that starts exactly where you are and builds from there, one day a...

This week we're giving you homework. The good kind. In Episode 41, Scott and Brittney introduce the Couples Dare Game — ten dares designed to be completed over the course of one week, escalating from easy and playful all the way to genuinely bold. One dare per day. Both partners playing. No skipping. From an unprompted appreciation ambush and a no-phone evening, to a question you've never asked, a...

Real life doesn't pause for intimacy. The phone goes off. The wrong song comes on. Someone says something accidentally hilarious. The body decides right now is the moment. The kid knocks. In Episode 40, Scott and Brittney get real and genuinely funny about the moments that accidentally kill the mood, share their own most memorable experiences, and turn all of it into a practical recovery guide tha...

Looking for the best sex toys for couples? Wondering what intimacy products are actually worth buying and which ones collect dust in a drawer? In this episode, Scott and Brittney share their 12 favorite couples intimacy products: the sex toys, personal lubricants, and bedroom accessories they personally use and genuinely recommend. No sponsors. No affiliate deals. No gifted products. Just honest r...

It's in a lot of couples' nightstands. Almost nobody talks about it honestly. Today we fix that. In Episode 38, Scott and Brittney break down everything couples need to know about personal lubricant — the most underrated, under-discussed tool in intimacy. Not as a solution to a problem, but as an enhancement to an already good thing. They cover all four main types: water-based, silicone-based, oil...

Most people rate themselves as above average in bed. Statistically, that's impossible. And the gap between how people assess their own performance and what their partner is actually experiencing is where most sexual dissatisfaction quietly lives. In Episode 37, Scott and Brittney go somewhere most podcasts won't: the specific, research-backed patterns that make people consistently disappointing in...

Most couples have annual physicals, quarterly financial reviews, and performance check-ins at work. Their relationship — the most important thing in their lives — gets evaluated only when something breaks. In Episode 36, Scott and Brittney introduce the Relationship State of the Union: a structured 90-day check-in that gives couples a dedicated, intentional space to assess where they are before sm...

No frameworks. No research drops. No homework. Just opinions — and our most unpopular ones. In Episode 35, Scott and Brittney bring five genuine hot takes about sex and relationships that go against conventional wisdom, popular advice, and what most people want to hear. Then they defend every single one. Scheduled sex is better than spontaneous sex. Most couples don't need more communication — the...

When couples say they want better sex, they're usually wanting three completely different things — and most of the time they don't realize they're in different conversations. In Episode 34, Scott and Brittney introduce one of the most practically useful frameworks in intimacy: the Three Dimensions of Sex. Partner sex — the intimacy dimension, craving genuine connection with a specific known person...

Why do you feel anxious after really good sex? Why does your partner pull away right when things get close? Why does a dry spell feel like evidence that the relationship is falling apart — even when you know logically that it isn't? The answer is almost always attachment. In Episode 33, Scott and Brittney complete their personality framework trilogy — Love Languages, Enneagram, and now attachment...

You know your Enneagram number. But do you know what it's been quietly telling you about what you need in bed? Following the success of last week's Love Languages episode, Scott and Brittney go deeper with the framework that actually explains why you want what you want — not just what you want. The Enneagram goes beyond behavior into motivation, which makes it uniquely revealing when applied to in...

You know your love language. But do you know what it looks like in bed? In Episode 31, Scott and Brittney take Gary Chapman's Five Love Languages — one of the most widely recognized relationship frameworks in the world — and translate each one specifically into what it looks like during intimacy. Not in general. In the bedroom. Because there's a massive gap between knowing your love language and k...

No research drops. No homework. Just a game — and a surprisingly revealing one. In Episode 30, Scott and Brittney play Would You Rather: Couples Intimacy Edition. Fifteen questions, real-time answers, zero prep — and more than a few moments where one of them surprises the other. Would you rather have amazing sex once a month or good sex three times a week? Would you rather know every fantasy your...

The orgasm gap is one of the most documented — and least honestly discussed — realities in sexual research. In heterosexual sex, men orgasm 95% of the time. Women? 65%. And that gap isn't a body problem. It's an information and attention problem. In Episode 29, Scott and Brittney tackle the female orgasm head-on — covering the anatomy most couples were never taught, the research on what actually w...

We made our actual Intimacy Bucket List. Then we told you which ones we've done. In Episode 28, Scott and Brittney get personal with 10 sexual experiences every couple should try at least once — and instead of keeping it theoretical, they share exactly where each item lands for them personally. Done it? Haven't gotten there yet? One of them more into it than the other? You're getting the real answ...

Where did you learn about sex and intimacy? Movies? Church? A locker room? A well-meaning friend who was just as clueless as you? Most of us absorbed our earliest beliefs about intimacy from sources that were wrong, incomplete, or actively harmful — and we've been quietly running on those beliefs ever since. In Episode 27, Scott and Brittney get personal and a little vulnerable as they walk throug...

One of the most searched, least honestly discussed topics in couples' intimacy — and we're going there. In this episode, Scott and Brittney tackle anal sex for beginners: the real statistics, the anatomy you actually need to understand, a practical step-by-step guide for couples who want to explore it safely, and the emotional conversation that most how-to guides skip entirely. Whether you're curi...

How connected are you — really? Not how connected you used to be. Not how connected you intend to be. Right now, today — how well do you actually know what your partner is carrying, what they need, and how satisfied they are? In Episode 25, Scott and Brittney do something a little different: they walk through a 7-question Intimacy Audit live — answering each question honestly, reacting to each oth...