Absolutely Not

On this episode, Heather talks about the pressure of getting the house decorated for Halloween.  The neighbors are doing construction and she is sitting in a house with no dining table, so the anxiety is high.  She takes on voicemails from gals with music suggestions and one that reminds you to google it yourself. Episode Sponsors: Quince — Find the fall pieces you will reach for most at...

On this bonus episode, Heather is excited to share extra Absolutely Not’s that people from her Atlanta show wrote in. She tackles people's critiques about the new pod refresh and reminds everyone that she is not a crime junkie. Episode Sponsors: Hill House Home — Visit hillhousehome.com and use code ABSOLUTELYNOT at checkout. Cozy Earth — Head to cozyearth.com and let them know you heard about the...

On this episode, Heather welcomes everyone to the new studio! It’s a fresh start, but we are still fired up.   She chats about her upcoming shows, the Plague and of course, Gypsy Rose. We hear voicemails about women's hotel room safety, a girl who goes on an audition, and on that asks the questions: how did millennials used to pick up on trends without social media? Episode Sponsors: Zales —...

On this episode, Heather welcomes Cortney LaCorte, the original Cheese Gal, from Nashville.  Her first cook book, Oversharing, is now a NY Times best selling cookbook. They chat about their love of martinis, umami flavors and a death row meal.  You will definitely get hungry listening to this. They take voicemails from people who hate a boring party, people who bring extra guests and the...

On this episode, Heather is back after a weekend in Mississippi and fighting for her life with her weekly sinus infection. She chats about ladies in the Delta, the Ole Miss Game as well as saying goodbye to the office studio. We have cruise updates and how she is ramping up for her special press tour. She has callers with chatty masseuses, nail issues, as well as some single guy friends who are co...

On this replay episode from March 2024, Heather welcomes Conor Wood to Absolutely Not and gives him some sage advice before he sets out on his first tour. Now a few years later, he has grown from Fibula to Dancing with the Stars. Episode Sponsors: Join Thrive Market today during their 25% off Healthy Reset Sale now through September 19th! PLUS get $30 off your first 2 orders when you use my link T...

On this episode, Heather welcomes Justin Slyvester to the pod post Emmys!  After doing it up all night at the after parties, they kiki about how he got his start as a “lady-sitter” at crazy southern weddings, his cross-country move to be Kyle Richards assistant, and how they were both up for the co-hosting job at the Today Show. They get to your voicemails and chat about their love of taking...

On this episode, Heather is coming to you from the NYC studio fresh off some press interviews for her new special.  She chats about her amazing day at the US Open as well as getting into fights with boomers. She takes voicemails about boys at the gym, Facebook marketplace finds and is left with a very serious question, Where Is Megan?! Episode Sponsors: Find the fall pieces you’ll reach for m...

On this episode, Heather is panicked after the passing of Dolly Parton and Tim Curry and is worried about who will be next. She is buying deep freezers, life straws and searching for sustainable beef. She takes voicemails from people wondering what we can eat, being a type B person, and a newlywed with some questions. We get a final voicemail that brings Heather to realization that we all need to...

On this episode from July 3rd, 2019 Heather sits down with Jeff’s biggest crush of all time, Jennifer Love Hewitt.  They discuss how she went from Kids Incorporated to a top Hollywood producer and all around bad bitch. They talk about love, grief, family and laugh through the pain of Hollywood. Episode Sponsors: Visit WACOAL.com and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout for 10% off your first purch...

On this episode, Heather is joined by one of her favorites, Logan Crosby. Logan will be joining us on the cruise again this year, but he also has his own new music that he is super excited about. While celebrating almost one year sober, Logan talks about how life has changed since the last time on the pod. They chat about the Clermont Lounge, senior pranks as well as the controversial Callaway gol...

On this episode, Heather celebrates the 400th episode of the podcast.  She is confused about how this is not the 4000th.  Christina (aka Tina) joins in with some games and memories from over the years of working together on Absolutely Not. Episode Sponsors: Head to https://www.squarespace.com/absolutely to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code absolutely. Joi...

On this bonus episode, Heather welcomes Heather Shaw to the studio.  Shaw is most known for her uncanny Jim Carrey impression and being vegan and sober. These two outspoken broads chat about if that was really Jim on the carpet a few months ago, the illuminati and other conspiracies.  She is currently on the road and you can watch her special, Alright, See Ya! , on Youtube. Episode Spons...

On this episode, Heather has just come back from an Ole Miss visit and is flying high from Rush work week.  She is feeling nostalgic helping a friend’s kid move into the dorms, getting roped into Rush Tok, and figuring out that parents these days just love their kids more. Episode Sponsors: Upgrade your everyday. Download the Quince app for app-exclusive offers, or go to Quince.com/absolutely...

On this episode, Heather is feeling the stress of “back to school”, and per usual she didn’t do her summer reading.  She gets her energy out with Robin at a Home Goods that would convince any non shoppers to try it out.  Voicemails from teachers, that first workout back, why everything has protein and what is up with asking for a coast lawyer. Episode Sponsors: Head to https://www.square...

On this episode, Heather is hitting summer hard, but paying for it. We learn what the Doctor has diagnosed her with, the feelings seeing a Noah Kahan concert brought up and how life as a homeowner is starting out. We get iconic voicemails that are Absolutely Not going to disappoint. Episode Sponsors:  Visit hillhousehome.com and use code absolutely at checkout for 20% off your first purc...

On this episode, Heather is on a tear after some heated meetings as well as cancelled flights.  While she had to miss the World Cup due to her own flight being canceled, she is here to teach everyone about flight etiquette.  She chats about critics of The Odyssey, Lindsey Graham’s ladybugs, and how Jeff is turning off every light now that they are homeowners.  Heather takes on the v...

On this replay episode from November 2, 2022 Heather is back from taping her first special, Son I Never Had, in Lexington, Kentucky.  She is full of gratitude as well as adrenaline after filming.  Son I Never Had is now available to stream on Hulu and to watch for free on Youtube! Episode Sponsors: Head to TryFirstleaf.com/absolutely to sign up and you'll get fifty percent off your first...

On this episode, Heather is back from one of the most insane weekends of her life.  Manifested so hard that she ended up in Hyde Park with Pitbull breaking a world record for most bald caps! She chats about how emotional it was to see the Bald-es as well as meeting Armando. She also details the rest of the weekend in London from Wimbledon to Kesha. Be sure to watch Youtube for an exclusive su...

On this episode, Heather is back from Europe and shares the highs, lows, and heavy flows of her anniversary vacation including the story of finally securing The Bag in Paris. She explains why sometimes you just have to do it for the plot and how a decade of dressing as Pitbull led to a surreal full-circle moment. Episode Sponsors: Make your summer wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com/absolutely...

On this episode, Heather is in LA and brings one of her oldest friends from childhood, James Abrahart to the pod. JHart is an award winning music producer, singer and reality star. Their lore starts in James’ parents basement where they used to create rap albums and eat way too many Pubsubs. They chat about their wild childhood neighbors of Whitney Houston and T-Boz, as well as them being the...

On this replay episode from June 15, 2022 she is getting ready for her wedding in Italy, and fast forward to 2026 her and Jeff are on their way to Florence for their anniversary. You’ll hear Heather have a mental breakdown from the complete shitshow that has been her wedding prep. You’ll see that she has turned into one of THOSE brides and is ready to tell everyone to fuck off all while losin...

On this episode, Heather is coming to you all live from a fabulous hotel in Florence, Italy where she and Jeff are celebrating their wedding anniversary. She starts off the pod chatting about her big move without one very important person- Robin. Heather chats about how Off Campus has changed her brain chemistry.  She brings us up to speed about her first days of travel to Italy and how Ameri...

On this episode, Heather welcomes Rosebud Baker back to the podcast. Rosebud has been busy since the last cruise. She now has a 2 year old daughter, is getting divorced and even had time to write a book! Fully Baked is a memoir that tackles family tragedy, motherhood, addiction all with honesty and humor. She also chats about her time and her departure from SNL. Episode Sponsors: Fo...

On this bonus episode, Heather continues her conversation with Sharon McMahon, covering a hypothetical run for office, a special tribute in Heather's act, and the story behind the “I Love Sharon McMahon” billboards. Episode Sponsors: Give your skin the affordable, luxurious glow up it deserves. Go to Naturium.com/ABSOLUTELY for 10% off your first purchase today. Shop at Sephora or get 10% off your...