Pure Desire Podcast

The year 2021 sort of felt like 2020 part 2. Would you agree? With all the challenging elements of the last year, we need to take a look at the year we just had. Lots of changes (good and bad) can cause stress, anxiety, and, oftentimes, backsliding in our healing journey. On today’s episode, we wrap up 2021 for podcasts. We end the year by talking through some of the highs and lows of 2021, what w...

The Christmas season can be challenging on the recovery and healing journey. This is because Christmas has some good and some bad. Good: spending uplifting time with family and friends, focused on giving gifts. Bad: spending draining amounts of time with a lack of boundaries and spiked anxiety. On today’s episode, we talk through how to manage ourselves and remain healthy during the Christmas seas...

Whether it’s with sexual brokenness or betrayal trauma, watching our loved ones battle with it is miserable. For those of us who’ve experienced healing and freedom from our own brokenness or trauma, we know the path of healing well. This makes it so much harder to watch our friends and family have their lives destroyed. This leaves many of us asking: “Is there anything I can do?” Today we answer t...

Trevor Winsor is the host of our podcast and today we turn the tables on him. Today, he's our guest and we ask him to share his story of healing. What started as looking for ways to help his students, Trevor stumbled into his own recovery journey. Today, he recounts his recovery journey from wounded and broken to helping others find hope and healing. RESOURCES FULL EPISODE VIDEO (YOUTUBE) GET STAR...

Trauma is something we've all faced in life. And trauma comes in a few different variations. Whether it's big traumatic events that rock our world or smaller traumatic events that happen over a long period of time, trauma impacts our lives at a very deep level. On today's episode, we look at the different types of trauma we can experience in life and how to bring healing to each of them. RESOURCES...

Relapse is never something we desire on the recovery journey. But a relapse is one of the best times to evaluate needed steps for sobriety. In today's episode, we look at a tool called the Crash Site Analysis. This tool helps us evaluate our recent relapse and identify the necessary steps for creating sobriety. RESOURCES FULL EPISODE VIDEO (YOUTUBE) PURE DESIRE GROUPS PURE DESIRE ONLINE GROUPS FAS...

Sobriety and sexual health require a lot of self-awareness. If we want to break free from unwanted sexual behaviors, we have to be aware of our pattern of relapse. On today's episode, we talk about a tool called the Matrix of Addiction. This tool helps us identify our relapse pattern and begin creating sobriety. RESOURCES FULL EPISODE VIDEO (YOUTUBE) GET STARTED Summit 2026!: Register Now Free eBo...

Sex is one of the biggest areas of a relationship or individual's life that is impacted by sexual addiction and betrayal trauma. Today, we field listener questions on the topic of sex. We cover things like fantasies, fetishes, low-sex drive, sexual anorexia, and more. Submit your questions for future FAQ episodes: Email your question to:  podcast@puredesire.org Message/DM us with your questions RE...

Nick and Michelle looked like they had it all. A good marriage, growing ministry, and a beautiful family. But in secret, Nick's sexual addiction was killing it all from the inside. Though he was a respected pastor, hated his behavior, and confessed often, Nick couldn't break free. This left Michelle at the point of wanting to leave. But that's not how the story ends. Over the past 10 years, their...

Experiencing sexual betrayal is unique. Finding out your spouse has been unfaithful or sexually acting out outside your marriage bed is soul-crushing. Is there hope for those experiencing betrayal trauma? We have Dr. Stefanie Carnes, President of the International Institute for Trauma & Addiction Professionals , on the podcast today to give us guidance for conquering betrayal in a marriage/relatio...

The Enneagram is a personality tool with many helpful aspects. Today, continue our conversation with Jeff and Beth McCord, authors and founders of Your Enneagram Coach, about how the Enneagram can be a helpful tool in recovery from sexual addiction and betrayal trauma. Today's episode is part 2 of our 2-part interview with the McCord's where we explore how the Enneagram can integrate into our heal...

The Enneagram is a personality tool with many helpful aspects. Today, we talk to Jeff and Beth McCord, authors and founders of Your Enneagram Coach, about how the Enneagram can be a helpful tool in recovery from sexual addiction and betrayal trauma. Today's episode is part 1 of our 2-part interview with the McCord's where we explore how the Enneagram can integrate in our healing and recovery. RESO...

Pornography and sexual brokenness are destroying marriages. But what if the messages we are taught about sex are just as damaging? Messages like "all men struggle with porn" or "women shouldn't deprive their husbands of sex" can be detrimental to our marriages. Today, we talk with the author of The Great Sex Rescue , Sheila Wray Gregoire, about how to rescue our marriages from porn and the negativ...

Harry Flanagan, AKA "Father Flanagan," was a pastor, leader, and influential member of his community. But due to his sexual addiction, all of that was lost. Family, ministry, and sense of purpose. But then Harry was introduced to Dr. Ted Roberts and Pure Desire Ministries. Now, Harry is a clinician and author with Pure Desire. Today, he shares his story of healing. RESOURCES FULL EPISODE VIDEO (YO...

There are two different kinds of group members: introverts and extroverts. Both need group. This week, we talk through what being an extrovert in group looks like (how to encourage them in listening and limiting their sharing), how to lead extroverts in group (if they take over a group meeting or advice-give), and how extroverts can best heal in a Pure Desire group setting. RESOURCES FULL EPISODE...

There are two different kinds of group members: introverts and extroverts. Both need group. This week, we talk through what being an introvert in group looks like (how to engage and feel confident sharing your story), how to lead introverts in group (drawing their sharing out of them without badgering), and how introverts can best heal in a Pure Desire group setting. RESOURCES FULL EPISODE VIDEO (...

In anticipation of this week's Pure Desire Summit, we wanted to explore the reality of healing happening below the surface. Finding freedom from sexual brokenness or healing from betrayal trauma doesn't happen with behavior modification. It's a deeper healing of our thoughts, feelings, and core beliefs about ourselves, God, and others. Today we explore below the surface healing. RESOURCES FULL EPI...

Betrayal trauma causes inner chaos. Parts of us want to run away and find safety. Other parts of us want to stay and fix or save. These "parts" of us can wage war, making us feel burnt out and hopeless. Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a therapy model that identifies these "parts" in us and how they wage war with each other. So much is at stake when choosing to address our trauma, so we must learn...

Anyone struggling with addictions knows the feeling of internal warfare. Parts of us hate the addiction while other parts of us keep pursuing it. Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a therapy model that identifies these "parts" in us and how they wage war with each other. As these parts fight it out, our unwanted behavior rages and wreaks havoc in our lives. Today, we're joined by IFS practitioner an...

Ever battled anxiety, doubt, or shame? These often stem from unresolved emotional scars that leave us with unfulfilled longings. We try to fulfill these longings through unhealthy behaviors and relationships that end up hurting instead of helping. This is why Ben Bennett (and Josh McDowell) wrote the book, Free To Thrive!  We talk to Ben about his new book and what thriving really looks like as a...

Men and women in the church hear the message "men need sex every 72 hours." Though a regular sex life is good for a marriage, this message can cause damaging effects. Today, we explore this message and identify why it's a myth, discuss the negative impact it has, and what healthy sex looks like in marriage. RESOURCES FULL EPISODE VIDEO (YOUTUBE) BETHESDA WORKSHOPS (TODAY'S SPONSOR) GET STARTED Sum...

Apologist and author, Josh McDowell has spent the past few years focusing on the area of sexual brokenness, specifically pornography. Today, we talk to Josh about what he's learned from years of research on the effects of pornography. We talk about trends we're seeing and what we can do to change the tide of sexual brokenness in our world. RESOURCES FULL EPISODE VIDEO (YOUTUBE) CARE FOR PASTORS (W...

Betrayal trauma is a real thing. When sexual brokenness and addiction enter a marriage or relationship, betrayal trauma enters with it. But what is betrayal trauma? How does it show itself in a marriage? Today, we talk about 7 keys to understanding what betrayal trauma is and how to heal from it. RESOURCES FULL EPISODE VIDEO (YOUTUBE) 7 KEYS TO UNDERSTANDING BETRAYAL TRAUMA (FREE EBOOK) RECOVERY A...

When Evelyn found out about her husband's addiction on their honeymoon, everything changed. You'd think it was addressed right then...well, it wasn't. Years later, when Evelyn finally drew her line in the sand, her husband joined a group and started his healing journey. From there, Evelyn experienced her own healing. And now? Well, she’s leading other women through their betrayal trauma and helpin...

Though it may not happen as often, men do experience betrayal trauma. Whether it’s their wife’s sexual addiction, affair, or unwanted sexual behavior, men experience betrayal. Is it different for men than it is for women? What can men do if this happens? Who can they talk to? We talk with Rich Moore about his experience of betrayal trauma and talk through what hope for betrayed men looks like. RES...