Video Death Loop

Summer may be winding down in the real life that you and live in, but it’s still going strong in the Bachelor in Paradise! Why, David Spade is hosting! And they got all these names having fun on the screen! Some of them may be rats habitating a facsimile of a human skin designed to… Read more S8:E24 – The ‘Bachelor in Paradise’ 2021 Intro

When you put Bac-Os on a salad, what you’re really trying to do is resign to fate. The salad is there. You’re going to eat it. You may enjoy eating it! You may not! But you’re probably not the most excited by it. You need something to take your mind off all that saladness. Bac-Os… Read more S8:E23 – Bac-Os Commercial

Captaiinnnnnnn Planet! We’re summoning him with our rings! Our rings of elements! We have to be in close proximity to the other four to do so and unfortunately, we hate the other teens! We’re just going to use our cool water powers to make like a river and flow into the ocean! We don’t need… Read more S8:E22 – Captain Planet Summon

Grant Nel took the dive like a champ. Hi fives, smiles, the only thing red was probably he back from the failed dive. I mean, what else can you do? When you receive a vision of the future and it is a zero score, you can’t exactly walk back down? You gotta follow through. Accept… Read more S8:E21 – Grant Nel Scores 0 Points with Failed Dive

Here’s your one chance, Fancy! Don’t let me down! Get the nice cat glasses out and let’s eat Viennetta! It has… Layers? Of Dairy? It’s not an ice cream. Legally we can’t call it an ice cream. We can legally say layers though, right? … Our lawyers say to hold off on the layers. Okay,… Read more S8:E20 – Breyers Viennetta Ice Cream TV Commercial

Sometimes, you just need a video of an anime chomping on ice. Just really going to down on that solid water hoping to crush it into a nougat of liquidy water. This is one of those days. You’ve earned it. You’ve made it to this part of the week and we’re so proud that you… Read more S8:E19 – Wolves Chomping on Ice

The damn sound. You can’t escape from it. No matter where you are in the house, it means someone is sneaking on the computer. And that your cleverly laid trap of leaving the pc speaker on at full volume worked. You know they’re about to log onto America Online to chat with their dang internet… Read more S8:E18 – Windows XP Startup Animation

VIDEO GAME HINTS! They’re fast and fun! It’s like an ancient gacha for your phone, except your parents will get even madder at you! Don’t mind the super hero trying to usher you into the St. Paul megadome (St. Paul residents, I am sorry but I’m not looking up your sports arena’s name. I’m sure… Read more S8:E17 – 1-900-HOT-HINTS Commercial

At Hidden Valley, the ranch flows unending. There’s just too much of it. We need to use it in more and more creative ways, but it means we all must make sacrifices. The ice cream truck? Gone. It’s now full of vegetables (and ranch dressing.) The children? They must enjoy the ranch as well. If… Read more S8:E16 – Hidden Valley Ranch Commercial

If you go to Kingfish Restaurant in Louisville, KY, it sounds like you’ll get some pretty good seafood! This is judging by the reviews online, but also the reviews of these paid(?) actors in the 1990s commercial they made it sound pretty sweet too! The catchy jingle and the twirling of shrimp and onion rings… Read more S8:E15 – Kingfish Restaurant Commercial

It’s Star Trek! In DEEP ASS SPACE! And… They’re mostly chilling. People are on their time share, y’know. Enjoying life among the potential war zone. Drinking at Quark’s Bar. Complaining about Romulan Ale or something. Look, I loved Deep Space Nine but I don’t think I’ve ever seen it remotely in narrative order. Mostly it… Read more S8:E14 – Sta...

It’s becomming firework season again in the US, which ranges from May – whenever we run out of fireworks! All manner of firepower big and small will be used, but maybe not these dainty little dragons that shoot fire out of two directions. They’re just too cute! You want to hug it while its on… Read more S8:E13 – BW1612 DRAGON WITH WINGS FIREWORK

Everyone loves a Herman Miller chair. Especially the host this week Aaron. But Aaron doesn’t want to pay full price for a Herman Miller chair, understandably! That’s why he is working for co-host John as his left Porsche 911 shoe, a concept he is looking to get outlawed *immediately* in all 50 states. Is it… Read more S8:E12 – Herman Miller Chair Commercial

There’s a place in Knoxville where you can go to see little circular homes that are of a certain fantasy classic but legally distinct from it. You can throw axes there! Talk by the fire! Listen to the power lines sing a song in your gentile ear. Yes, it’s the Ancient Lore Village, a project… Read more S8:E11 – Ancient Lore Village

You’re done arguing with your friends! We can all agree going to the Werewolf versus Vampire movie is neutral ground, right? We weren’t all going to see Mystic River so you better damn well deal with this sci-fi creation under a blue light and you better be damn neutral about it! Look, there’s vampires! And… Read more S8:E10 – Underworld (2003) Official Trailer

It turns out that everything they warned us about is all true. Pokemon Cards are the devil’s work! The mere touch of a rare card is enough to convert your entire body into an explosion of pokemon cards and coalesce into something that looks quite like you… But different. Never will you be the same… Read more S8:E9 – Pokémon TCG Commercial

No, I do not want to date your avatar. Unless your avatar is a Ragnarok Online model! Then maybe I would consider it! We would have spent ages levelling up together, so at the point where we may consider dating I would know if we were a good fit for each other. We’d also know… Read more S8:E8 – The Guild – Do You Wanna Date My Avatar

We live in a society where we can get very specific descriptive pills faster than this Clue speedrun we watched on loop for this episode (At least, if you’re in America. We’ll privatize the shit out of anything!) Professor Plum will give you all the boner pills a podcast can buy! Maybe he even has… Read more S8:E7 – Clue Speedrun in 0:00.733

Oh, damn! Looks like Timmy’s a big kid now! He’s got the double deep dish pizza lunchable with a cola and Reese’s cup! It’s where cravings and malnutrition meet and he’s at the height of his popularity! He’ll remember this day where he was the envy of all the other kids on his school lunch… Read more S8:E6 – Lunchables Mega Pack – 2000 Commerci...

It’s another day at the workplace. Everything is the exact same. The cafeteria ran out of bananas again. Your co-worker can’t stop yapping about the event of the moment. Your boss wants a report in. If only something could help alleviate this boredom! Perhaps a chatting application built into my required mailing software for my… Read more S8:E5 – IBM Lotus Sametime for IBM...

Sam Beckett is unstuck in time and oh boy is he solving a lot of problems! He’s quantum leaping here, quantum leaping there, leaping everywhere and all he wants to do is go home and cause problems. He’s not even leaving the problem solved in a respectable state! When he quantum leaps out, the person… Read more S8:E4 – Quantum Leap – Season 1 Intro

The spirit of horses are alive, but not the horses themselves! They’re just in another world and they’re racing for… I dunno, reasons? Because they gotta? Maybe it’s like a hummingbird thing and they always gotta keep running so it’s better to put that energy on the track? Hasn’t that one horse girl been in… Read more S8:E3 – Umamusume: Pretty Derby...

It’s time for some German song and dance! Please join us as we use the ancient woodland instruments! A fake wooden fake synthesizer. A Fake bongo/cymbal thing. Fake bird calls. An especially fake backdrop! Together, with the power of lip syncing we will tell this world about how they will perish without trees. But in… Read more S8:E2 – “Die Woodys – Fichtl’s Lie...

Sometimes, you just need to have an impromptu, indecipherable breakdown battle with a bullet. It happens to the best of us, but only KoRn was able to monetize it in a way to make them big. I hear the bullet is making their rounds on the con circuit, punching holes in all the kids’ klassic… Read more S8:E1 – KoЯn – Freak on a Leash

Jingle All The Way is that Christmas Movie most people can get behind. It’s not any of the classics that are overplayed on the television screens this year, for one. It also has Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sinbad in their prime, so people can point and go “I remember that guy!” or even “I remember that… Read more S7:E40 – Jingle All the Way Movie Trailer