The Regulated Parent

Before your child entered the world, you had already been taught what a child should be, how they should speak, how quickly they should obey, which emotions were acceptable and what respect should look like. But how much of what we learned in childhood continues to shape the way we parent today? In this episode of The Regulated Parent, Kay and Toyer explore how childhood experiences, cultural expe...

In this episode of The Regulated Parent, Toyer and Kay Jappie go beyond the diagnosis to ask what a genuine system of care should look like. For parents, we explore what to do after diagnosis without feeling that you have to solve your child’s entire future at once. For paediatricians and clinicians, we ask how we can move beyond the referral list, hold the whole child in view, create more neuro-a...

In Part 2 of The Regulated Parent, Kay and Toyer move beyond the diagnosis itself and explore what the latest thinking in autism science is asking families to reconsider. What happens when we stop asking, “How do we make this child more typical?” and start asking, “How does this child experience the world?” This episode explores identity-first language, autistic identity, sensory processing, inter...

What happens after the assessment is over? After the report has been handed to you. After you’ve walked out of the consulting room. After everyone else has gone back to their lives. This episode is for that moment. In this deeply personal and practical conversation, Kay and Toyer Jappie share their family’s journey following their daughter Grace’s autism diagnosis and the lessons they wish someone...

In Episode 6 of The Regulated Parent Podcast, Kay Jappie sits down over coffee with Neuro-Education specialist Nicola Killops for an honest and insightful conversation about Twice-Exceptionality. As two Twice-Exceptional mothers of Twice-Exceptional children, they bring together professional insight, lived experience and the realities of raising children with complex, uneven profiles. Kay is the m...

Episode 5: Co-Regulation – Why Connection Comes Before Correction In this episode of The Regulated Parent, Toyer and Kay Jappie explore the science and heart of co-regulation, the process through which children learn emotional regulation through safe, connected relationships. Drawing on over 70 years of parenting experience between them, alongside the best available evidence in developmental neuro...

In this episode of The Regulated Parent Podcast, we explore “The Regulated Marriage” a conversation centered on what it means for two people to build and sustain a healthy, grounded partnership while navigating the pressures, responsibilities, and emotional demands of everyday life. Pastor Jeremy Thomas and Pastor Sharon Thomas join the discussion to share practical wisdom, lived experience, and s...

In this powerful conversation, paediatric specialist, author and entrepreneur Dr Lethabo Machaba joins Kay and Toyer Jappie to explore the hidden stress many children carry in today’s fast-paced world. Together, they unpack the impact of chronic stress on children’s developing brains and bodies, the connection between gut health, inflammation and emotional wellbeing, and why so many children are b...

In Episode 2 of The Regulated Parent  “Beyond Behaviour: Why Children Are So Overwhelmed” Toyer and Kay explore the growing emotional, sensory, and nervous-system overwhelm many children are experiencing in modern life. The Regulated Parent is a podcast by GRACIA Collective, hosted by Toyer and Kay, exploring parenting, emotional wellbeing, nervous systems, sensory experiences, relationships, and...

In the very first episode of The Regulated Parent, Kay and Toyer explore the emotional realities of modern parenting in a culture increasingly shaped by performance, perfection, overwhelm, and disconnection. Together, they reflect on conscious parenting, inherited trauma, emotional awareness, performative parenting, nervous systems, dignity, humanity, and the pressure placed on both parents and ch...