The Done Bingeing Podcast

The last three episodes explored both the downside of having rules for others around your eating, your food, and your weight, and the upside of letting those rules go. But we were careful to acknowledge that taking responsibility for how you feel and what you do, regardless of other people's behavior, doesn't mean that you stay in relationships—or that you tolerate relationship dynamics—that harm...

We've spent the last two episodes exploring the drawbacks to having rules for others around your eating, your food, and your weight. It was worth it to take the time to understand how having manuals for others holds us back because on the surface they seem like a pretty good idea. So, now that we're clear that manuals are more trouble then than they're worth, how do you get out of the habit of wri...

We're digging deeper into what it really means for us (and others!) when we have rules about how other people should behave around us, our eating, and our weight. Right now, for example, you might be asking others to police the way you eat. That might seem like a great idea, but it often leads to frustration and resentment for all involved. Others feel manipulated and you feel let down. This episo...

This episode continues the exploration of conditioned eating and focuses on staying in our power no matter what other people do with food around us. You might think that your partner shouldn't have brought home Krispy Kreme, or your colleague should think twice before ordering in a crate of muffins for the office, or your neighbor could be a little more thoughtful about sending over cute little Ch...

One of the most deeply held beliefs preventing people from stopping at the level of fullness that feels best for them is that it's wrong to waste food. If that's something you believe, it's a thought worth exploring because that thought often leads to guilt, which then leads us to eat the food we're afraid to waste. We have so much baggage about throwing out food that we rarely stop to ponder that...

Sometimes feeling full, satisfied even, can feel scary. If that's you, you may reside in a half-starved state at or close to your goal weight but with a different kind of misery. Or, you may sprint from starved to stuffed, then slide back down to start the cycle again. Part of your work may be to edge up the hunger–fullness scale until you find a level of satisfaction or fullness that works better...

If you're open to looking for signs of physical hunger—and to experiencing it once it arrives—this episode will take you a little deeper. In addition to understanding how your body signals physical hunger, it's helpful to understand how the intensity of your hunger changes over time. Using a number scale to assess hunger and fullness can help you to get in touch, and stay in touch, with physical s...

Rediscovering a nourishing fullness begins with the willingness to first be empty. In other words, you need to risk hunger. With a history of bingeing or overeating or chronic dieting, hunger may be something that you no longer let yourself experience often. It can feel uncomfortable, sometimes even terrifying. If you feed yourself when you're hungry and if you bring a mindful awareness to deconst...

We eat when we're not hungry for many reasons. With all our social conditioning to eat when we're not hungry, it's no wonder that many don't have a clue what physical hunger feels like. Two of the main reasons are that we mistake psychological hunger for physiological hunger and we're not in tune with our hunger signals. Ultimately, we want to eat when we experience physiological hunger and use ot...

What time is it where you are right now? Is it mealtime? How do you know? So often we eat because of the time or because others are eating or because others are encouraging us to eat or because we're afraid of what others will think of us if we don't. Many times we eat because we see an ad or pass something that looks good or smells enticing. Sometimes we eat when we're not hungry because we've be...

It's showtime. And you're ready. You've been practicing your script—the list of thoughts that describe who you truly are and who you truly want to be. Now, I want you to live as the person you want to become. We live like everything depends on our past. But, what if, you lived like everything depends on your future? What if you lived your script? What if you lived your new thoughts, like "Others h...

You've written your script—the list of thoughts that describe who you truly are and who you truly want to be. Showtime is coming. The set is being built. The props are being purchased. The lights are being hung. Auditions are underway for the supporting actors. And you just got the rehearsal schedule: you're due to practice every day, at least twice. You want to know your lines inside out so that...

With a sense of the actions you need to take to create a life free from bingeing and full of living , we need to fuel those actions with the emotions that will inspire you to take them. How do we do that? With your thoughts. This episode is a deep dive into new thoughts to shift your focus from taking in food to taking in life. We know what you want to leave behind. And we know where you want to g...

I want you to look beyond the end of your bingeing. Why? Because bingeing or overeating may have become an all-consuming drain on your life, a central focus, perhaps even an identity. When it's gone, there may be a hole in its wake. And what then? What will you do and who will you be? A hole that remains after you stop bingeing may have contributed to why you started bingeing in the first place. S...

Everything you create in your life is an indication of your power. Your thoughts cascade into the results you have in your life. And that is amazing news. Why? Because you can choose the thoughts you want to think . So, in this episode, we're breaking down how to think deliberately into four manageable steps: finding out what you're currently thinking, evaluating whether those thoughts are serving...

Our brain is the most powerful asset we have. Yet, left unattended, it will lead us down the path of least resistance, down a well-laid trail. Why? Because it's easier and more efficient. So . . . what to do? Think deliberately! The ability to be aware of your thoughts and to think certain thoughts on purpose is the privilege of being human. If you're bingeing, compulsively eating, emotionally eat...

There's nothing more important than how we feel when it comes to getting what we want and need. Why? Because feelings are the reason why we do everything we do. They are the reasons why we make the choices we do around our eating. In fact, feelings are so central to eating that emotional management is a must if you want to reach the goals you have for your eating and your weight. You are one feeli...

Many of us are so detached from our emotions that we can't even name them. In fact, most people don't know the difference between really feeling an emotion and resisting, reacting to, or avoiding one. Truly feeling an emotion can be done sitting on a chair and experiencing sensations in your body without taking any action at all. Listen in to Episode 15 to find out how! Episode 12 began the discus...

Sometimes feelings suck. Especially when you don't want to feel them. One of the main reasons we have the desire to overeat is that overeating is an effective—though temporary—pain killer of feelings we don't want to feel. The fact that it has the effect of doing what we want it to do—numb painful emotions—even for a short time is what keeps reinforcing its use as an analgesic. Episode 14 drills d...

We have the desire to overeat for three main reasons: 1. because we use food to anesthetize painful emotions, 2. because of how we're conditioned to eat by society, and 3. because of how our dopamine system is hijacked by high-sugar foods. You can begin to unlearn that desire by understanding how we use food to deaden uncomfortable feelings, how we're conditioned to overeat, and how the neurotrans...

Losing weight after being a binge eater—without triggering more binges—can be tricky, which is why most approaches will barely touch the topic. I've left this issue to the end in this series on self-regard because without a solid foundation, any weight loss information I offer just risks being rehashed into another hysteria-driven, hate-based dieting mentality. I'm done with that, and I hope you a...

You've binged. Again. And you're tempted to run from that reality. I know the feeling. But I've got a better idea. Something happens when we run: everything goes by in a blur. And what can you see in a blur? Not much. Some unidentifiable streaks perhaps. And this is exactly where bingeing thrives. In the blur, in the streaks. In the unwillingness or inability to see, to be aware, and to be conscio...

You want the binges to end right away. I get it. Try to be patient with yourself. This process can take time, and you're well on your way. Let's talk about what to do if you're not yet able to defuse and bypass your urges to binge. I can't let you off the hook here! Yes, you've guessed it . . . you've got to binge with self-regard—that form of deep, unconditional love for yourself that we've been...