The Divorce Decision Podcast

Is your relationship affecting you more than you realize? In this episode of Lucky in Love , I break down 3 sneaky signs your relationship is taking a toll on you—mentally, emotionally, and even physically. If you feel tense when your spouse walks into the room, notice that your patience for everyone else is getting shorter, or find yourself daydreaming more about being alone than reconnecting, th...

In this episode, I'm breaking down a deceptively simple tool that can change the emotional temperature of your marriage fast: the 3% Rule .  If your partner is “97% responsible” for what’s wrong, where is your 3% —the part you can own, influence, and change? This isn’t about taking the blame or excusing bad behavior. It’s about taking responsibility in a relationship in a way that reduces res...

In this episode, Lucky in Love, I’m breaking down how sex quietly turns into a chore in long-term relationships—and how to start fixing it fast.  If you’re in a dead bedroom, a sexless marriage (or nearly sexless relationship), or struggling with mismatched sex drives (a desire discrepancy), this episode will help you understand why your sexual desire may be fading—and what to do to fix a dead bed...

In this episode of Lucky in Love, we’re talking about the sneaky relationship habit that quietly pulls couples apart: passive-aggressive behavior.  Not the “big blow-up” fights—more like the slow drip of little moments that leave your partner feeling tense, guarded, and emotionally unsafe over time. And the worst part? A lot of us don’t even realize we’re doing it… or how much it changes the way o...

In this episode of Lucky in Love, I’m talking about the one thing almost every divorce has in common—and it’s not what most people assume. Most marriages don’t end because of one dramatic moment. They end because of tiny turning points—small decisions that quietly change the direction of the relationship… and then get repeated until distance feels normal. I share a personal story from my first mar...

Is your partner a chronic worrier or do they struggle with anxiety?  In this episode of 'Lucky in Love', we discusses the often overlooked impact of anxiety on relationships. I emphasize that anxiety affects not only the individual but also their partner, leading to exhaustion and frustration. Through real-life examples, I explains the withdrawal-pursuit cycle that can develop in anxious...

Have you ever led with sarcasm instead of just saying what you wanted or needed?  Started a fight you didn’t really want by asking a question you already knew the answer to— just to prove a point? Or began the conversation with a “joke” that wasn’t really a joke - or if your significant other does— this episode of Lucky In Love is for you.  I’m breaking down why we pick fights we don’t actually wa...

Do you have a mind-blowing sex life? Do you want one? In this episode, we are talking about common problems couples struggle with when it comes to sex.  We’ll talk about pressure, resentment, desire gaps, and the quiet patterns that shut sex down… and then we’ll get into some practical, real-life suggestions that help sex and intimacy feel connected, playful, and yes—spicier. This episode starts m...

In this episode of Lucky in Love , I'm breaking down the sneaky, often-missed signs your partner is unhappy in your relationship —even if you feel fine.  I  explain how mismatched expectations, unresolved resentment, and outside stress can quietly widen the gap between you, showing up as pulling away from rituals, more solo time, short answers, less affection, and a fading sex life.  You’ll l...

When your significant other says, “I’m unhappy,” it can feel like a gut punch. In this episode, I break down exactly how to respond—without panicking, dismissing, or scrambling. Learn the three-step framework: take it seriously, get curious and listen, then create a real plan of action together. What You’ll Learn Why “panic or brush-off” responses make things worse The mindset shift: unhappy ≠ out...

I’m sure you’ve heard it: “You two just need more date nights.” It’s well-intentioned advice, but when a marriage or relationship is struggling, it can actually make things worse. In this episode of Lucky in Love , I’m breaking down why more dinners out and weekend getaways won’t fix what’s really going on underneath—and what to do instead. Because the truth is, the problem usually isn’t how much...

Have you ever been stuck in gridlock with your partner or spouse? Unable to find a solution you can both agree on?  Instead of getting stuck in right-vs-wrong battles, I teach you how a simple mindset shift allows you to hold two truths at the same time — creating space for connection, collaboration, and creative solutions. We will talk about how either/or thinking fuels defensiveness, resentment,...

In this episode of Lucky in Love, I'm counting down the 7 little phrases that can blow up your arguments—and what to say instead.  These may seem small in the moment, but they either escalate conflict or chip away at your connection in ways that stick long after the fight is over. I’m sharing why each phrase is so damaging, the deeper emotions that often drive them, and—most importantly—simpl...

Accidentally push your partner’s buttons? You’re not alone. In this episode of Lucky in Love , I share what to do (and not do) when your partner or spouse is triggered, why button-pushing damages trust and intimacy, and how to calm things down, reframe the conversation, and rebuild connection. 👉 Grab the free Trigger Reflection Guide at kahoskins.com Should We Get A Divorce Quiz:  https://kari-ho...

Do you lose your sh*t when your partner says or does something that triggers you? Yep, the struggle is real. In this episode we talk about my 3 step process of keeping your cool when your partner hits a nerve. You'll learn why certain words, tones, or behaviors can send you into an emotional spiral, how past experiences shape your reactivity, and why some personalities are more sensitive than...

If you're tired of walking on egg shells. If you are feeling disconnected or you simply want a stronger connection this episode is for you. These phrases can create powerful shifts in how connected your partner feels to you. These are everyday words that say, “I see you, I care about you, and I’m with you.” When used with intention, they can bring you closer and strengthen the heart of your r...

Feeling misunderstood in your relationship? You might be falling into the mind- reading trap—expecting your partner to know what you need without saying a word.  In this episode, we uncover three signs you've fallen into this trap, and the signs might surprise you.  You’ll learn how to clearly express what you need, stop guessing games, and rebuild emotional connection through honest communic...

You’re not crazy—sometimes it really does feel like your partner isn’t hearing you. But what if the problem isn’t what you’re saying... it’s how you’re saying it? In this episode, Kari breaks down the art of reframing—how to say the same thing in a way that actually gets through. From calling out common communication landmines to showing you exactly how to rework those heated phrases, you’ll walk...

Every couple argues—but what really matters is what happens after. In this episode, we explore the power of repair rituals : those small, intentional gestures that help you reconnect after a fight. Whether it’s a hug, a note, or a shared laugh, these rituals create emotional safety and prevent lingering disconnection. You’ll learn: Why lack of repair—not conflict—is what truly damages relationship...

Is your relationship starting to feel a little…meh? You’re not alone—and it’s not a sign you married the wrong person. It is a sign that you might be stuck in a relationship rut. In this episode, we're talking about what really causes that blah feeling in long-term love (hint: it's not just time), why it can be more dangerous than you think, and—most importantly—how to shake things up wi...

In this episode, we’re talking about what actually happens in your body when you get emotionally triggered—and why it becomes so hard to stay calm and present in the heat of a disagreement.  Kari breaks down what it means to become dysregulated, how your nervous system flips into survival mode, and most importantly—how to get back to calm fast. You'll learn 5 simple, science-backed strategies...

In this episode we talk about how to the tell the difference between a relationship that can be saved and one that probably can't. I share with you 3 questions to ask yourself if you're feeling stuck and unsure if your marriage is fixable.  I also share 6 signs that repairing the relationship will be more challening.  This episode will provide you with clarity and insight into what it re...

In this episode, Kari Hoskins tackles one of the most maddening relationship dynamics: what to do when your partner completely shuts down and refuses to communicate—a pattern known as stonewalling. Kari breaks down why people stonewall (spoiler: it’s often not about you), what it looks like, and why it’s one of the top predictors of divorce. She dives into the damaging Pursue-Withdraw cycle, offer...

In this episode of Lucky in Love, we’re diving deep into the sneaky world of self-fulfilling prophecies in relationships. Ever feel disconnected from your partner and then catch yourself acting distant too? That’s not just a mood—it’s your brain quietly sabotaging your connection. Kari breaks down how thoughts like “They don’t care,” “I feel alone,” or “We’re growing apart” can spiral into real di...

Rituals aren’t just routines—they are powerful ways to deepen connection and strengthen your relationship. In this episode of Lucky in Love, Kari shares how simple, intentional rituals can prevent “roommate syndrome,” enhance intimacy, and even help couples recover from conflict faster.  She reflects on her own experiences, from childhood observations of her parents’ rituals to the intentional tra...