That Relationship Show

In 1986 the unimaginable happened to the Bias family when their basketball phenom son Len died from an accidental overdose that sparked the Reagan era war on drugs. Less than four years later tragedy struck again, this time claiming their beloved son Jay. In the years since, their mom Dr. Lonise Bias became an agent of change, helping others to prevent senseless loss and channel their grief toward...

It's never easy to hold ourselves accountable--yet we ask this of our clients every day. Deb & Nao welcome Certified EFT therapist, author and Fulbright scholar Dr. Yamonte Cooper for a candid conversation about the history of racism in America, and how our own ideas of race were constructed. 

At a time in history when righteous anger is at unprecedented levels, we sought the expertise of someone who could help us navigate this important signaling emotion. Certified EFT trainer Kenny Sanderfer, LMFT shows us what car hoods, beach balls and crowing chickens have to do with anger, and offers hope for understanding and reconciliation.

Join us as we welcome Certified EFT Therapist & Supervisor Jila Behnad, LMFT.  During times of stress like the one we are all in with COVID 19, we may feel trapped or hopeless. During these times especially we need to be seen by those who matter most to us, and to see them in return. Jila offers tools to navigate the conversations that will foster connection, even in the most challenging circumsta...

In times of distress, uncertainty and sorrow it becomes clear that we need both connection and resilience. It is precisely these times that create opportunities for increased intimacy in relationships. Dr. Peggy Kleinplatz has studied the ways that human beings overcome obstacles to co-create magnificent sex. She shares what she and co-author Dr. Dana Menard learned from 15 years of research.

As the uncertainty of COVID 19 impacts all of us around the world, Dr. Rebecca Jorgensen joins us to talk about the role of empathy and compassion in relationships. She explains how mirror neurons can help us infer intent with others, and reminds us that empathy for ourselves is always important. 

In this episode Deb & Nao highlight a common yet often undiagnosed block to connection: Childhood Emotional Neglect. Psychologist and expert on the diagnosis and treatment of CEN Jonice Webb talks about its symptoms, and what is absolutely necessary to repair this injury and restore emotional connection.

Like the opioid crisis, pornography lurks in the open with most of us unaware of how violent and easily accessible it is, damaging children, adolescents and adult sexual relationships in its wake. Dr. Gail Dines, researcher and expert on the impact of pornography on human development and society joins us for a frank and often shocking discussion of this important issue.

Have you ever wondered what makes us flip out, numb out or even just chill out when we're interacting with someone? We have, so we invited therapist and Polyvagal Mapping expert Deb Dana to help us understand the biology that drives these states. She offers tips for getting back to chill out when we're triggered.

Deb and Nao enlist the help of Master EFT therapist Jim Thomas to discuss what it's like to be a man in relationships. From familial to cultural messages, they list the subtle and overt pressures that can make connection difficult for men. In the process they conclude that men are not, in fact, from Mars; they originate right alongside women on planet Earth.

In this episode Deb & Nao talk about the challenges & rewards of pursuing certification in EFT. They interview newly certified therapist Elizabeth Moitoza LICSW about her experience, and offer tips and support for those in the process. 

Deb and Nao welcome New York Times Bestselling author Dr. Emily Nagoski, expert on women's sexual wellbeing. Using warmth and humor, she covers everything women need to know--from the impact of stress on women's health and well-being to modern day romance novels to the importance of bringing joy and pleasure to our lives. 

Deb & Nao welcome Master Trainer George Faller to share his wisdom about how EFT can best help couples and families. From his experiences as a firefighter during 9/11 to working with couples impacted by trauma to training hundreds of therapists in the model, George brings his unique brand of warmth and humor to The Couch.

Deb & Nao interview Trainer and Co-Director of ICEEFT Gail Palmer, MSW, RMFT. From her early collaboration with Sue to her decades working with families and teaching EFT to students and therapists, Gail brings her warmth and wisdom to The Couch. She explains how the model of EFT is used with families to promote connection and growth throughout the lifespan. 

Deb & Nao welcome therapist, New York Times bestselling author and former Hollywood writer Lori Gottlieb to The Couch to talk about her new book Maybe You Should Talk To Someone . The book chronicles her own therapy and the ways it dovetails with four of her clients' stories. Funny, engaging and deeply personal, Lori's stories inspired us to reveal some of our own.

In this bonus episode, Deb & Nao talk about Emotionally Focused Individual Therapy, and offer practical tips to help listeners learn how to identify, regulate and lean in to emotions. These skills empower us to have the kinds of relationships that fulfill us---whether with a partner, a co-worker, a child or a friend.

From Las Vegas, arguably the capital of competing attachments, Nao & Deb welcome Dr. Anabelle Bugatti. Host of We Heart Therapy, Anabelle talks about what it's like to work with couples in Sin City, where there is so much that can threaten attachment. From Mama's Boys to pleasure-seeking, the episode covers the gamut of EFT in action.

Deb & Nao welcome renowned psychologist and expert on sexuality in relationships Dr. Barry McCarthy. In this candid and often explicit interview, Dr. McCarthy tells us why sex should be a team sport, how desire can be rekindled and when we should engage in foreplay. This is not an episode to listen to with your kids in the car, but definitely worth sharing with your partner!

From Ireland via San Francisco, Deb & Nao welcome Marriage & Family therapist Fiachra Figs O'Sullivan. With his unique brand of warmth, humor and Irish charm, Figs shares his passion for helping others heal from emotional pain. He his therapist wife Teale run the company empathi.com, aimed at democratizing mental health care. 

Deb & Nao welcome Dr Susan Simonds from Moscow, Idaho to talk about a passion of hers; the intersection of trauma, relationships and healing through creative expression. She explains how forgetting the orange juice can be a blip on the radar or a nuclear meltdown, depending on our trauma history. 

From parenting to relocations to job changes, every couple will experience life transitions and the stress, joy and pain they bring---sometimes all at once. Deb & Nao enlist the help of Theresa Bullock Cohen, LICSW, Certified EFT supervisor and group process expert to talk about how couples can prepare for and work through these changes. Theresa offers guidance so that couples can protect and stre...

Deb and Nao enlist the help of EFT trainer, author and adjunct faculty member at UNC Greensboro Lorrie Brubacher, LMFT & RMFT to talk about the most painful of injuries for couples. Lorrie shares her extensive knowledge about how couples can come together after safety and trust have been shattered, to a place of deep healing and reconnection. 

Deb and Nao land the interview of their dreams with Psychologist and EFT developer Dr. Susan M. Johnson. Sue shares the stories of her childhood and young adulthood that led to her passion for helping couples find connection.

Triggers are the match and core struggles the gasoline that set the negative cycle ablaze for couples. In this episode, Deb & Nao enlist the help of EFT supervisor extraordinaire Jean Shirkoff LICSW to help couples learn how to turn off the gas valve and snuff out the match before too much damage is done. By identifying our triggers and seeking support for our core struggles, we can avoid the nega...

Deb and Nao confront their own issues with technology usage, and enlist the help of Oz Akbas, LMFT, who has a specialty in the impact of technology usage on individuals, couples, families and society. They discuss the unintended consequences of technology usage, and Oz gives tips about how to protect our most cherished relationships from being negatively impacted by it.