Stable But Not

Sup thotties! Back to our regularly scheduled program 🤪 you will have to forgive us for our technical difficulties, it’s not our best episode, but we’re just girls trying to make a podcast OKAY?! Kicking it off with some red dye 40 we talk about Melissa being out of water and the PANIC Joe went through. Pour one out for all the sad losses we have already experienced in 2026 💔 Kelsey has been div...

Happy Thursday thotties! 🥂 We are in our thirty and flirty era…even though Kelsey is already halfway to 31 🤢 and let’s be real…how is that even possible??? We go over what we have learned in our short thirty years here on earth and what we would love to go back and change or wish we could encourage our younger selves to learn sooner. NEWS FLASH!!!! LISTEN TO YOUR PARENTS! Life at 30 is pretty sw...

Tell a friend to tell a friend, WE’RE BAAAACK! 🥂🎉 Guys, it’s been a long 2 years but here is a gift to you!!! Also, it wouldn’t be Melissa and Kelsey if we didn’t plan to release this on Christmas but ran into LOTS of technical difficulties trying to do so….. So hope January works for y’all LOL Truly, thank you so much for hanging around and waiting on us, and if you’re a new listener - welcome,...

WE’RE BACK! Did you miss us??? Melissa’s stuffy, Kelsey’s bruised, we’re still unstable and living through it. Are we a day late? Yes. Are we hours late while being a day late? Also yes. BUT WE ARE JUST GIRLS, OKAY??? 😂 And while we're being honest, Melissa edited but didn't write a full description of the episode and Kelsey is quickly trying to crank this out because she has her actual job to do...

What’s up thotties, we are back with another episode and this week we are cranky, we are tired and we are mourning. RIP Matthew Perry 💔 and also, if you didn’t already know this, Melissa’s uterus is expanding 😭 she is still not enjoying pregnancy but we digress 😴 Kelsey is also down bad, but she is insured and USING THOSE BENEFITS HUNNY 💅 now both the girlies are four eyes 🤓 but Kelsey opted...

HEY THOTTIES!! This week the girlies are hUNgry, Melissa is getting a tooth pulled, and Kelsey is a travel girlie this week. We've got unpopular opinionssssss and they are HAWWT ‼️ One of Kelsey's opinions proves that she will ✨always ✨be a little toxic and we support her every step of the way 😂 Joey always goes to Joe (duh, nothing new) and Kelsey's ick is her dad, again???? See you next week!...

Happy Thursday, thotties!! Hey hi how ya derrrrirn??? 🤪 We’re here, hot, and unstable as we talk possible new merch ideas (we still have merch for sale btw ‼️). Tune into our instagram for our poll on our new merch ideas! We are more than halfway through 2023 and Kelsey has realized her New Years resolutions’ need to be... well, to not make anymore resolutions 😂 We’re both fall loving girlies an...

✨**we apologize for any bob the builder related noises you may hear during this episode, all we have to say about it is, well, JOE.**✨ We feel like we’ve been saying this a lot lately but we’re BACK! Kelsey’s now a pilot (go her) ✈️ and Melissa is still here and still pregnant. 🤰 Melissa doesn’t have pregnancy brain, she is literally just that dumb and she’s OKAY with that ok! 😂 While Melissa...

Melissa is all by herself and ranting. That's it. That's all.

Sup thotties, we’re here this week and Kelsey has a tale of how she made some Spaniards mad and they are now scamming her. Pregnancy is already taken its toll on Melissa and boy are these going to be a loooong seven months 😮‍💨 We’ve had it up to the ceiling with these baby names!!! YOU ARE NAMING AN ADULT!!! Stop the madness! Melissa’s salty about her registry being, well, ignored for a lack of...

WHAT IS UP THOTTIES! 🥂 We are finally back (oops, sorry) and so so glad you have stuck with us. We use this episode as a catch up. What's up, how ya been? We bring a lot of big, HUGE life updates and don't worry - we won't be gone as long again because we are trying to get our lives together by actually scheduling some bulk erecting days 🤦🏼‍♀️ Kelsey shares her life updates, ranging in a LOT of...

THOTTTIESSSSS, we’ve missed you! Kelsey is distraught as homeboy is "cross country" in Europe and Melissa finds peace in hearing about murders??? Hurricane Idris, Adelaide or whatever the heck she wants to be called made landfall but on a serious note, we are sending our prayers to every single person/family that has been affected by the hurricane. Kelsey needs glasses?? 🤓 Welcome to 28, girlie p...

Thotties we are thottin this week 🥴 The heat is triggering us, people who love this weather trigger us, and being exhausted triggers us 😡 Invest. In. Your. Beds. Guys!!!! Or if you’re Kelsey and homeboy, just invest in a sleep number and call it a day. Are you guys on Melissa’s side and will be brutally honest with your friends or are you going to ✨ listen ✨ and support them? Kelsey has been p...

THOTTIES WE’RE BACK!!! 🍾 Joe put Kelsey in a giggly mood or maybe it’s homeboy?? We’ll just go ahead and say it’s both 😛 we have homeboy and we have Franklin 🐢 and with homeboy, Kelsey wants everyone to STOP 🛑 swiping up ok??? Anyone who picks up Melissa with pizza is a winner in her book and homeboy definitely passed the test 💪 Kelsey’s allergy to DAWN has come back with vengeance and it’s a...

Starting off unstable this week with Melissa doing Kelsey’s job 😂 I mean we can’t even get to check ins without random questions to kick things off - so thotties, what kind of fruit do you like? Are you berry bitches or are you sticking with stone fruits? We love Kelsey’s smitten vibes, is it finally her lover girl era??? 😍 We take a moment to discuss the hard parts that come with grief; we’re k...

While Kelsey may have shown up ✨ slightly ✨ on time to record, she did not show up caffeinated and she’ll tell you aaaallll about it 😉 but seriously, coffee is life and if you know you know. We don’t settle for gas station coffee in the booty room 🛑 but is homeboy going to make Kelsey a tea drinker??? Stay tuned because Melissa is worriED. Melissa is popping bottles whether it’s on an airplane...

**TW suicide/SA** We’re starting off hot and heavy after a *much* needed week off describing how Kelsey was toxic for her birthday and how Melissa is a baby when it comes to shots 🙈 we’re gossip girl Stans and haters even if homeboy and Joey don’t understand! Is Kelsey in love??? Maybe not but Melissa is with this situation and we’re here for it 😆 hearing Kelsey swoon over her new boo makes Meli...

Prosecco bottles aren’t for Melissa and you can clearly hear that in the first 15 seconds of this episode 🫠 Joe tried DECEIVING the perfect calendar Melissa has placed in her life, which track since he is always problem! Kelsey is fully committing to hard launching bae down the line, and we’re kinda here for it?? 👀mTHIS DAMN SUBMARINE has us in a choke hold with asking why???? How???? Again—WHY?...

Raise your hand if you’re a girlie with stomach issues 🙋🏼‍♀️ we’re delusional and long winded with this episode as we start with our intrusive thoughts on wanting Taco Bell and what our orders entail. Joey D and Melissa have a new adventure they are embarking on and Melissa is slightly stressed but excited! Stay tuned for all the updates on that 😜 Kelsey and Melissa have battled this battle for...

We are absolutely not stable this week coming off of Kelsey’s birthday and it tracks. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO OUR GEMINI QUEEN!!! We love our Kelsey and we are so glad she was born—gemini or not 😂 Buffets are not a thing for the girlies and that’s just that. We both have equal icks when it comes to the consumers and workers in the service industry 😂 when it comes to mowing our own lawns, Kelsey and Me...

We’re starting off strong this week with both of the girlies on the verge of a menty b 🫠 Does Kelsey have a spending problem? Maybe. Is that the reason why we all feel poorer than po’? Absolutely not, it’s this ECONOMY! Melissa’s raw dogging life and the vibes are very low whilst doing so 😂 We’re a few days short but we wanted to briefly speak on how May was Mental Health Awareness Month and how...

Welcome back, thotties! Kelsey is starting off strong with her being ✨ delicious✨ Kelsey loves a good plum and Melissa is a berry bitch so that’s that. Silly goofy moods happen quite often for our own thottie M-Dawg and K-Sizzle can’t believe it 🤪 We dig deeper into Melissa’s Pump Rules thoughts and we still are not here for the worm with a mustache, Scandavol 🤢 We can always count on Melissa...

We’re back this week hot and heavy off of Kelsey’s date high 😉 Enjoy the sweet rumblings of Kelsey’s arm movements as we enter into this episode 😂 We’re still ICKED by mini vans but we still ❤️ hot dads in minis but NOT ones in souped up minis! Melissa speaks on her “short woman complex" as Kelsey talks about her *slight* car troubles 🫠 Melissa once again proves to us that she is unstable as sh...

Welcome back and thotties we are hitting it strong with the poorly done Russian accents, wheezes, and rain sounds to soothe you all within the first three MINUTES 🫠 Melissa just went to her new husband’s, Zach Lane Bryan’s (yes full name), concert and she is in love to say the LEAST. Meanwhile, Nana is giving Kelsey a run for her money with all the sass and attitude 👀 Kelsey asks a VERY importan...

Welcome back, thotties! 🥂 We’re still feeling a little down this week but we’re here pushing through it, yet again 🫠 *trigger warning* We dive deep down into the world of mental health and where both of the girlies are at in this point in our lives.  Just normal best friend tings, liiiike getting our eggs checked 😜 We be going through it, but in the end we will always move forward and push on...