Secret Son

Hey all, did you know that the day destroys the night and night divides the day?  Tune into episode 5 to hear author/writing coach Anne Heffron and I get psychedelic. We talk rocky reunions, wrestling with our demons and the psychological efficacy of binge eating.  And, of course, breaking on through. Anne Heffron is the author of You Don’t Look Adopted, Truth and Agency: Writing Ideas for Adopted...

My interview with actor, writer & director Peter Marino about a very traumatic event we share - seeing the 1975 film Jaws in the cinema at much too young of an age.  What followed for us has been a sneaking suspicion that every body of water may very well contain a shark or two.  Please join us for a lighthearted look at what it was like seeing this Steven Spielberg summer blockbuster upon its...

On today's episode, Patricia Knight Meyer and I talk black market babies, the power of genetic mirroring and the magic of Glen Campbell.  Join us! A baby-scoop era black-market "adoptee," Patricia was sold along a curb outside a Texas hospital and grew up with no legal identity, date of birth, legal adoption, or court appointed guardian. Thus, despite one shady attorney’s best laid...

Emma Stevens and I discuss being the adoptee chameleon, secondary rejection and scanning strangers' faces wondering if they might be family.  Join us!    Emma Stevens is a U.S. domestic adoptee from birth and has survived layers of trauma that have put her on multiple journeys. She developed the inner strength and courage to surmount the many struggles she faced. Her traumas were born from fi...

 Amy Lokken and I delve into the challenges of being a transracial Minnesota adoptee, the openness of 1970s hippies and the fiery spirit of Betty Jean Lifton.  Join us! Amy Lokken is a biracial, transracial adoptee, born in the Upper Midwest in the mid-sixties. She  currently lives in San Francisco. Amy is the author of two memoirs. The first, beloved i am , chronicles her life as an adoptee, grow...

Join Shane Bouel and I as we delve into searching, societal resistance to our search and piecing together our new identity.   Shane Bouel, an Australian adoptee, is a compelling voice shedding light on the intricate journey of adoption. In his thought-provoking piece Understanding the Unseen Journey of Adoptees, he explores the three half-lives of adoption, delving into the complexities faced by a...

Searching and finding disrupts long-standing family dynamics.  Jack Dermody and I delve into how newly arrived adoptees are like bombs thrown into a family and how the knowledge gained by searching offers us an invaluable new perspective on ourselves.  Letting go of what could have been, Billie Eilish and even Lawrence Welk make an appearance.  Wunnerful!     Born in 1945, Jack Dermody is one of t...

Join Emily and I as we discuss Paris, embracing the sublimity of a neurodivergent mind and fearfully admitting to others what they actually already know about us.  Emily is a 40-year old domestic infant adoptee, born outside of Chicago, Illinois.  Her roots are planted in Bismarck, North Dakota and other neighboring Badlands communities.  Emily is an artist, writer and musician much like various m...

Anna Fienbork was adopted as an infant after five days at the hospital. The fact of being adopted was part of her life from early on. The emotional wounds of this early trauma of separation eventually lead her to doing emotional and spiritual work to face what felt like a black whole inside of her – the sense of having no roots, of somehow being utterly flawed. Her personal path has brought Anna t...

From rural Chile to urban Sweden, Maria Diemar started life with a huge journey. Join Maria and I as we discuss kidnapping investigations, maddening bureaucratic red tape and '90s Nordic Neo-Nazis. Los Secretos are everywhere!   My name is Maria Diemar. I’m 47 years old, adopted, a teacher and mother of 3 boys. I was born in Chile then adopted in Sweden where I grew up but I currently live in...

David Lynch's story and mine run rather parallel.  BPD adoptive mother? Check. False leads in our father searches? Also check. Our Lady of Corporal Punishment primary school? Oh, yeah.  Join David and I as we delve into these topics, Barbara De Angelis and much more!    David Lynch is an adoptee who searched and found his birth mother in 1992-93. He is a writer, graphic designer, and musician...

 Dave Brown has his own Tales of the City.  Join us for episode #11 of Secret Son as we discuss coming out in the 70s, implicit memory and meeting inebriated relatives for the first time.  Thanks for listening! I  am a domestic adoptee born in Virginia, raised in San Diego, CA, and have lived in the San Francisco Bay Area most of my adult life. I have a Bachelor's in Business Management and a...

Join me for episode 9 with Shawn Sigler.  We cover the usual stuff - KKK relatives, Cold War Berlin and seeing ourselves in photos of our deceased fathers.   Shawn has had an incredible journey of persistence, bravery and self-discovery. Somehow he seems to have emerged from it without bitterness. A very inspiring story and episode! "I was born in 1963 in Indiana. I was adopted by a white cou...

Hey! Yeah, you! Why not join us for episode #10?  Pamela Karanova is a force to be reckoned with in the adoptee community and has a new Substack you should definitely check out!  Pamela and I discuss angelic librarians, going on the wagon and wild dogs deep in the Iowa countryside.  And, of course, secrecy! Pamela A. Karanova is an adult adoptee from Iowa residing in Lexington, KY. She's the...

Hey y'all - between us, some days I just wanna be sedated.  This is not one of those days.  In episode 6 of Secret Son, I head to the Deep South, set on the porch for a spell and have a leisurely tête-à-tête with Alicia Bratton.  And, honey, let me tell you, we cover some stuff – progressive Alabama politics (no joke), bayou existentialism  and the freedom that fifty brings.  And, it goes wit...

Sweet home Chicago!  The Windy City plays a big part in Cammie Smith’s story.  Join us for episode 7 as we get into how best to sneak into nursing homes, problematic Radio Shack ad campaigns and walking that fine line of being either too black or not black enough. And, as always - secrets! "I'm a 33 years old TRA (transracial adoptee) and I was adopted at the age of five when my birth mo...

Oi mate, how you going?  Join us for episode 8 as I chat with West Coast gal Vicky Graham in her new home in Oz.   We investigate the Usual Suspects - romcom-ish reunions, local marsupials and surviving the Land of Misfit Toys.      “Mom and Dad adopted me when I was eight months old.   Before then, I lived in the Crippled Children’s Home with the other unwanted babies, our own Island of Misfit To...

I met therapist/adoptee advocate Joe Soll in the mid-90s in New York City.  We'll discuss decades-long family searches, "spaciness" and getting fed up with living in secrecy.  As we all slowly beat back the darkness and embrace much-needed longer days (I'm looking at you especially, Berlin), this is the perfect episode to shine some light on the adoptee perspective.  Druids and...

Folks, they threw her to the wolves and she’s come back to lead the pack.  Superstar podcaster and adoptee activist Haley Radke joins me this week to regale us with tales of being a secret, stalking and the Great White North.  So, while you’re (soberly, of course) shooting off those fireworks on New Years Eve, why not multitask?  Put on your headphones, crank up the volume on episode three and rin...

Join Secret Son this week as we journey back to a time when it was morning in America. Reagan was president, the Eurythmics were tearing up the charts and the nation was falling in love with a precocious teenager named Michael J. Fox. Meanwhile, today’s guest and I were sitting next to each other in high school mulling over our own Family Ties. Liam Nitka and I were in the same high school class a...

Who better to launch with than the woman who helped me track down my father?  Adoptee rights advocate and search angel extraordinaire Annette O' Connell and I talk family searches, secondary rejection and the ecstasy of experiencing genetic mirroring.  Somehow I called her by her maiden name of Daly. Apologies! Music by the inimitable Cassis Birgit Staudt.    Annette Daly-O’Connell (she/her)...

Parichard Holm – Healing Through Movement Born in Thailand and raised in Germany, Parichard Holm struggled with identity and belonging. Feelings of disconnection, anxiety, and panic shaped her early years as she searched for a sense of home within herself. At 18, on the search of her birth mother, a healing Tui Na massage in Thailand transformed her life. This powerful experience awakened her pass...

Falsified birthdays, smuggled DNA tests, women’s prisons!   George Barbakadze and I discuss that uneasy floating feeling of pre-search life, the joys of a successful DNA result and anticipating a future of wrestling with identity issues.  I loved speaking with George. He story demonstrates persistence despite many obstacles. Somehow he has remained through it all a very nice guy. Inspiring!  Georg...

When I asked New Hampshire-ite Greg Gentry how he was doing, he simply put down his musket, looked in the camera and said, "live free or die!"   Listen in on our conversation as we take a deep dive into that tenuous thing called identity and how searching for family impacts it.  Along the way, we touch on Nietzsche, Alfred North Whitehead and taking long drives when discussions at home g...

Season 2 of Secret Son keeps rolling along and, based on last week's number, people like hearing about identity! Secrecy is so last season. But not really. It's all a jumble, as we know.    Join show patron and fellow Midwesterner Bruce Porth and I as we discuss our young selves discovering Ayn Rand, the challenge for adoptees of the edict "just be yourself" and how searching f...