NDA: No D*cks Allowed

Send us Fan Mail How often do you say yes to something simply because you have the capacity or capability? Because you have the time, the skills, the energy, or because someone else is counting on you? But being capable of doing something doesn't necessarily mean you're willing to do it. And somewhere along the way, many women have learned to treat those two things as interchangeable. In...

Send us Fan Mail Tradwives. Girlbosses. Pick-me girls. Eldest daughters. The internet has a label for just about everything these days. But what happens when those labels start influencing who we think we are? In this episode of NDA, we're exploring how social media algorithms can quietly turn relatable content into rigid identities. What starts as recognizing a piece of yourself in a post ca...

Send us Fan Mail We can be really good at convincing ourselves that being hard on ourselves means we have high standards. In this episode, we talk about the difference between actually holding yourself accountable and turning every mistake, bad reaction, or missed expectation into evidence that there’s something wrong with you. We get into guilt, over-responsibility, impossible standards, and the...

Send us Fan Mail Why do we tell the people who love us that we’re fine when we’re not? In this episode, we’re joined by Stephanie Kennedy for a conversation about what happens when we try to carry difficult experiences on our own while also protecting everyone else from worrying about us. We talk about the difference between privacy and isolation, why asking for help can feel like becoming a burde...

Send us Fan Mail This episode looks a little different from our usual format. Amanda brings a shrinking behavior she has been wrestling with into the conversation in real time: the fear that a nonlinear career journey makes her harder to understand, harder to market, and ultimately less credible. Elizabeth coaches her through the assumptions underneath that fear, the imaginary version of herself s...

Send us Fan Mail Nobody handed us a rulebook, yet somehow so many women learned the same rules anyway. Apologize when you have done nothing wrong. Pretend everything is fine. Avoid a few seconds of awkwardness, even if it inconveniences you. Add the exclamation point so nobody thinks you're mad. Say “we should get together” when you both know you probably won’t. In this episode, we’re looking...

Send us Fan Mail What do you do when you’re communicating clearly, raising legitimate concerns, and the people around you still aren’t listening? In this episode, we’re talking about what happens when women are interrupted, dismissed, talked over, or ignored, especially in male-dominated environments. We unpack the instinct to assume the problem must be how we’re communicating, which can lead us t...

Send us Fan Mail We talk a lot about toxic romantic relationships, but toxic friendships can be harder to recognize, especially when there’s history, loyalty, and genuinely good memories mixed in. In this episode, we’re talking about the friendships that leave you second-guessing yourself, editing your joy, explaining away behavior that doesn’t sit right, and feeling guilty for setting boundaries....

Send us Fan Mail Women are taught to care about other people. But somewhere along the way, many of us also learned that our own wants and preferences are not enough. We feel pressure to justify why we want something, and just as often, why we don’t.  Saying yes feels easier when we can explain how it benefits someone else. Saying no feels more acceptable when we can prove how we've earned it,...

Send us Fan Mail TW: This episode includes discussion of eating disorders, disordered eating, body image, weight, dieting, and exercise-related behaviors. Listener discretion is advised.  We spend an enormous amount of time thinking about our bodies: how they look, what we eat, whether we have exercised enough, what other people might be noticing, and what we should be doing differently. In this e...

Send us Fan Mail There’s a difference between being honest and using honesty as cover for cruelty. In this episode, we unpack the kind of “honesty” that shows up as unsolicited criticism, backhanded comments, judgment disguised as concern, and the familiar excuse: I’m just being honest. We talk about why this behavior shows up so often between women, how insecurity, competition, resentment, and pe...

Send us Fan Mail We like to think being prepared means being safe. If we anticipate every possibility, make the backup plans for the backup plans, manage the details, read the room, stay useful, and keep everything moving, maybe nothing can catch us off guard. But control is often less about the outcome and more about the feelings we are trying to avoid. In this episode, we unpack the different wa...

Send us Fan Mail Type A is treated as the standard for what responsible, prepared, and successful should look like. When someone operates differently, their process is frequently mistaken for disorganization, procrastination, or a lack of commitment. In this episode, Elizabeth talks honestly about what it feels like to be a Type B person in a world that does not always understand or appreciate her...

Send us Fan Mail Content note: This episode includes a detailed account involving a firearm and a perceived threat of gun violence. Listener discretion is advised. Self-doubt is not always proof that we are unqualified. Sometimes it points to a real opportunity to learn, prepare, or grow. Other times, it's old criticism, conditioning, and fear that we view through a self-created filter as obj...

Send us Fan Mail You're the one everyone depends on. The one who always steps up, solves the problem, picks up the slack, remembers the details, and gets things done. Those qualities make you incredibly valuable. But they can also become the very things that keep you stuck. In this episode, we unpack what Amanda calls the competence curse : the pattern where women become known for their relia...

Send us Fan Mail Financial abuse is one of the most common forms of abuse, but it's one that can often be tougher to recognize when you're in it. Many women don't realize it's happening because it rarely starts with dramatic financial betrayal (secret credit cards, draining a bank account). Instead, it often looks like one person taking over the finances, discouraging questions...

Send us Fan Mail How many opportunities have we missed because we assumed the answer would be no? Assuming a no before asking for a raise. Before applying for the job. Before speaking up in a meeting. Before asking for help. Before ordering our meal the way we actually wanted it. In this episode, we're talking about one of the most common ways women hold themselves back: negotiating against t...

Send us Fan Mail What happens when being yourself starts to feel like another performance? In this episode, we're unpacking the tension between hiding and oversharing, and why neither one is actually authenticity. Some women carefully edit themselves, keeping their opinions, needs, and emotions tucked safely away.  Others share everything, hoping that vulnerability will create connection. But...

Send us Fan Mail For decades, women have been told they can have it all. A successful career. A thriving family. A clean house. A full social life. Time for self care. Time for everyone else. And when it all feels impossible, the advice is almost always the same: get organized, manage your time better, set better boundaries, become more resilient. But what if the problem isn't your planner? I...

Send us Fan Mail You know your attachment style. Your Enneagram number. Your communication tendencies. Your childhood wounds. Your triggers. Your patterns. So why are you still stuck? In this episode, we're unpacking a modern trap that many women fall into: confusing self-awareness with actual change. Somewhere along the way, reflection became a substitute for action. We learned to analyze ou...

Send us Fan Mail TW: This episode includes discussion of burnout, serious medical events, and brief references to suicidal thoughts. Listener discretion is advised. We’re taught that perfectionism is a sign of ambition. That it means we care. That it’s what separates high performers from everyone else. But what if perfectionism isn’t really about excellence at all? In this episode, we unpack the h...

Send us Fan Mail TW: This episode includes discussion of body image, weight, eating disorder recovery, sexual abuse, medical procedures, and women's experiences with body-based judgment and objectification. Listener discretion is advised. Women are taught early that our bodies are projects. Something to improve. Something to shrink. Something to manage. Something to earn approval through. In...

Send us Fan Mail We love to talk about generations. Boomers don't like change. Millennials are entitled. Gen Z doesn't want to work. At least that's what we're told. In this episode, we're unpacking why generational stereotypes have become one of the most socially accepted forms of bias and what gets lost when we reduce complex human beings (especially women) to labels. Th...

Send us Fan Mail Women are often taught that humility is a virtue. And it is, until it becomes self-erasure. In this episode, we unpack the way many women instinctively minimize their accomplishments, deflect praise, over-credit others, and move past their wins without ever fully allowing themselves to feel proud of what they achieved. We explore how women are socially conditioned to prioritize hu...

Send us Fan Mail We say it constantly. To our partners, our kids, our coworkers, our friends. "I'm fine." But what are we actually saying? We're saying: my feelings are too much. My needs are inconvenient. It's easier if I just disappear a little. In this episode, we get into one of the quietest and most costly shrinking behaviors women do, swallowing their real emotions t...