Misseducated

Abstract (TL;DR) ⏰ After 64 attempts and zero orgasms, I finally understood why 81.6% of women can’t reach orgasm from intercourse alone. Here, I uncover the reasons why. I was in a one-year relationship. We were in our teens, and although we had lots of fun penetrative sex in different places, neither of us understood the importance of the female’s pleasure in a heterosexual relationship. I cite...

Dear Wonderful Readers, The following vignette is what we call a “raw write.” I wrote it in 40 minutes in my writing class called UnMute , led by my incredible writing teacher, ANN RANDOLPH . I've been attending Ann's classes for the last three and a half years, and working with her has been a huge part of my creative journey. She'll be starting up UnMute again in the fall for any of you who have...

Dear wonderful readers, Today, we have the ultimate treat for you all! This week, two shameless sex writers on Substack sat down to share our personal experiences of what it's really like to publish the details of our intimate lives on the internet. Share the steam with a spicy-minded friend 🔥 Abigail A Mlinar Burns , the married sex writer behind Happy Endings , and Tash Doherty , the single sex...

What you see on social media can stand in your way of being shamelessly sexy . Here’s what to do about it. Short Answer ⏰ Comparing yourself to others on social media creates a shame spiral that traps you in four ways: expectation, comparison, striving, and validation. To counteract this, change your media diet (follow fewer accounts that make you feel terrible, and more accounts that make you fe...

On a warm afternoon in May 2011, I was walking down Tottenham Court Road in London. I had passed through the wide, open grassy squares of Bloomsbury and Holborn, filled with corporate people enjoying the late spring sun. Now, I was surrounded by the streets of fried chicken joints and tourist souvenir shops packed with people as I headed to catch a double-decker bus home. At 16 years old, navigati...

Introduction 💒 “Oh, it's a nice day to start again / It’s a nice day for a white wedding” — Billy Idol, White Wedding . A new line from Paperless Post appears in your email inbox. You’re hesitant to open it because it can only mean one thing. Yet another couple you know is fulfilling society’s most boring prophecy: they’re getting married. Weddings are challenging things. They test us. They plonk...

This article has been updated and republished in full on tashdoherty.com . Enjoy! Introduction 🚀 “The challenging thing is that we tend to feel that we live in a liberated age and that, therefore, it’s especially odd to feel that sex is a bit odd.” — Alain de Botton , Design Matters Podcast . This article has been years in the making; it’s an honor to share it with you today. It combines two beau...

Warning: This piece discusses my menstrual cycle in depth. If that doesn’t interest you, please do something else with your time. I won’t be offended. Thanks! “Man is an intelligence, not served by, but in servitude to his organs.” — Aldous Huxley, Brave New World. Dear Wonderful Readers, I am not a scientific expert when it comes to a complex topic like the menstrual cycle. But as a writer who is...

I scheduled a meeting with my boss one cold mid-March morning in New York City. Since saving up almost $40,000, I had started to taste freedom in my morning coffee. My courage came out of nowhere. I was about to do something crazy. I was on the edge, flirting with the real world. That morning, I did the dead. I quit my full-time job. Three years have passed since that fateful morning, and this wee...

Introduction 💌 When you find out your crush doesn’t like you back, it’s a dagger to the heart. It’s a stab to the ego. But when you hear they like someone else in your friend group instead, it’s a double blow. The tsunami that follows the earthquake. For example, last week, I found out that the guy I sent a fun love letter to actually fancies my friend, and now they’re dating. Meanwhile, I’m stil...

Hello Wonderful Readers, What I’m about to share with you is completely real. I wrote a love letter to another writer. We met through friends in Mexico City. Over dinner, he told us he had written a short story about sex, and about him. I told him I wanted to read it. I gave him my email address. At the club later that night, after he had emailed me the story, he stood over me and talked loudly ov...

Introduction My mission is to help the world be shamelessly sexy. To me, that means not feeling ashamed about who you are or the type of sex you want to have. It means going after the things that you want in bed and in life. Being shamelessly sexy looks different for everyone. It’s something you need to define for yourself on your own terms. Also, no one can ever be perfectly shamelessly sexy. Tha...

Intro Hello Wonderful Readers, Sometimes, it’s the chance encounters that can lead to the most fruitful stories. And that’s exactly what happened when I met Pauline about a month ago. As you know, our mission at Misseducated is to help the world be shamelessly sexy, and as far as I'm concerned, very few people embody that quite as much as Pauline. I was going to publish another article this week,...

Hello Wonderful Readers, Last week, I interviewed Camilla Sievers, founder of Qi Health . Qi is a Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) company that creates personalized blends of natural herbs to solve various problems in women’s health. Camilla was inspired to create her company from her journey using TCM to relieve her persistent period cramps and other symptoms. Now, her team has built a seamless...

🎶 Recommended song pairing (my friend Holly ’s idea!): Introduction My mission in this life is to help you become shamelessly sexy. Of course, helping you figure out how to be sexy is the fun part. But before we can do that, we need to focus on what no one wants to talk about: shame. Exploring our shame is challenging. This experience is not going to be comfortable or easy. But I can guarantee th...

This post has been updated! You can read the latest version here on tashdoherty.com. Introduction 📖 So, you’re curious about having a one-night stand. I’m glad you’re here! I’ve had a few in my time; some very successful, some less so. Whether this will be your first one or you’re a regular wondering how to make casual sex work better for you, I’ve compiled everything I know to write this ultimat...

Hello Wonderful Readers, I hope you had a lovely holiday. Despite having Covid and then the flu and watching the neighborhood my mother grew up in being razed by a wildfire, I am keeping my promise to you. I’m here to tell you the story of how Todor and I met. Before I do that, I have one very exciting announcement. Upcoming Topic on Misseducated Podcast: Open Relationships Next week, I will be in...

Hello Wonderful Readers, I’m writing to you from Santa Fe, New Mexico. (Well, actually, I got Covid, so I’m secretly finishing this a week later back in Mexico City. Please forgive me.) I’ve just finished a week on a remote ranch in The Land of Enchantment. In the desert, I went on lots of reflective walks, looked up at the sky, and cried into the mountains. Yes, it was very dramatic and revealing...

Hello Wonderful Readers, Yesterday, a poet asked me, “Do you ever tell lies?” He had locks of brown hair, a strong jawline, and wicked eyes that smiled. I caught his gaze for a second, but then I quickly looked away. I focused on his somewhat dorky, checkered shirt. My shoulders hung heavy with guilt as I listened to the catchy notes of Lou Reed that played over us from an old vinyl turntable. I w...

Hello Wonderful Readers, I felt a lot of resistance writing this piece. I’m very tired right now. Most of you reading this are not in high school, and any of my younger cousins or friends who might be are probably just scrolling on TikTok. You can see how my inner critic is already working against me! That’s why it’s important to me to challenge myself. I’m determined to write and publish this pie...

Introduction Hello Wonderful Readers*, A very contentious topic came up in a conversation with my female friends this week. I discussed with them how I’m single and looking for a partner in bed and in life. But how old is too old? And how young is too young? When I decided to write about this topic, a cultural icon immediately came to mind: founder and innovator Cindy Gallop . She’s currently 64,...

Dear Wonderful Readers, I am sitting in the airport, grumpy with myself. I’m in Terminal 2 at Heathrow in London. For such a massive space, this place is oddly quiet. There’s only the shuffling of footsteps and the thumping wheels of carry-on suitcases. When I go to the airport, I often feel inspired because, in the most physical sense, I am going somewhere. But I don’t feel inspired today. Twelve...

Introduction Hello Wonderful Readers, One year ago, I became an author . As I tucked into a giant half-baked cookie pan and vanilla ice cream to celebrate (thank you to the charming man who ordered it for me), I reflected on my failures and learnings this last year. Today, I want to share those with you. This year, my attitude towards living a creative life has changed completely. Since I started...

This post will be unlocked in one week for free subscribers 💌 Hello Wonderful Readers, As you come out of the bathroom at Casa Franca you see him standing there, kissing her. She has her back to you. You see his swoosh of black hair, and his mustache. You can tell from the way he’s holding her. It is him. You just know. Before you can remember his name, and before you remember that you blocked hi...

Hello Wonderful Readers, Late last Thursday evening, I felt terrible. As I walked with my two friends through the dark, tree-lined streets of Mexico City to a cocktail bar, a giant, hollow pit was growing inside me. Not because I was hungry. I had just eaten two slices of my favorite pizza in the whole world: the Picante Pep from Hanks . But not even that salami, basil, and sweet, spicy honey coul...