Marriage iQ

Looking for the best marriage advice to take your relationship from "fine" to high-performing? In this episode of Marriage IQ, we sit down with Dr. Robin Buckley to discuss transformative relationship strategies that bring the best of the boardroom into your home. Do you run your business like a pro but your marriage like a Hallmark movie that’s running out of script? You aren’t alone. Many high-p...

Does your marriage feel hopeless right now? Before you make any permanent decisions, you need to know if you are fighting your spouse or if you are both fighting depression. ⚠️ This is Part 2 of our Deep Dive on Depression. In Part 1, Dr. Scott Hastings explained the medical side (brain chemistry, meds, and diagnosis). Watch Part 1 Here: https://open.spotify.com/episode/5PZyTeOqWd5E7YU1gTuQAh?si=f...

Stop blaming yourself for being "lazy." If you physically cannot get off the couch, no amount of willpower or New Year's Resolutions will fix it—because the problem isn't in your mind. It’s in your biology. In this video, Dr. Scott Hastings explains the difference between "burnout" and actual clinical depression. We break down the invisible physical markers—from inflamm...

In this reposted episode of Marriage IQ , we pause for the holiday season and reflect on the importance of slowing down, being intentional, and prioritizing family time—before stepping into a deeply meaningful conversation about trust and healing in marriage. We’re joined by Geoff Steurer , a licensed marriage and family therapist who specializes in helping couples rebuild trust after sexual betra...

We’re bringing back one of our earlier Marriage IQ episodes—because emotional triggers in marriage haven’t gone away, and this conversation is just as relevant and needed today as ever. Have you ever wondered why a simple comment from your spouse can suddenly spark a strong emotional reaction? Or why conversations sometimes derail before you even realize what’s happening? In this episode, we explo...

We’re bringing back one of our earlier Marriage IQ episodes—because the patterns that drive conflict in marriage haven’t changed, and this conversation is just as relevant today as ever. Ever wonder why the same arguments keep resurfacing in your relationship? Or why small misunderstandings can suddenly spiral into major conflict? In this episode, we explore a powerful (and often invisible) force...

We’re bringing back one of our earlier Marriage IQ episodes—because the conversation around expectations in marriage is just as relevant today as ever. In this episode, we unpack how unspoken and unrealistic expectations quietly shape marital satisfaction. Using pop-culture contrasts like Enchanted vs. Shrek , we explore how fantasy versions of love collide with real-life marriage. Along the way,...

Busy. Tired. Running on fumes. Sound familiar? In Part 2 of our conversation with Dr. Greg Smalley (VP of Marriage at Focus on the Family), we talk about what really happens to marriages when life gets overwhelming—and why “we’ll fix it later” rarely works. Greg shares a devastating personal story about his daughter’s marriage ending on her third anniversary, and how that moment reshaped the way h...

You’re not bad at communication—you’re just missing a few critical skills. In this episode of Marriage IQ, we’re joined by Dr. Greg Smalley (Focus on the Family) for a powerful conversation about why couples keep miscommunicating—and how small shifts in how you speak and listen can radically change your marriage. From misunderstood questions and defensive responses to old conversations that keep r...

Nicole Kidman had all four of our Marriage IQ Cornerstones… so why did the marriage still fall apart? In this surprising episode, Heidi and Scott unpack what really sustains a relationship—from identity and intentionality to integrity and authenticity—using Nicole & Keith’s story as a springboard (with zero judgment… only compassion). We talk “astroturfing” vs. real intimacy, why compromise is...

In Part 2 with Rick and Clancy Denton—hosts of The Loud Quiet—we dive into the beautiful, hilarious, and sometimes overwhelming realities of empty-nest life. From learning to coach (not control) your adult kids, to resisting the Mama-Bear rescue mission, to navigating the emotional squeeze of the sandwich generation, this episode is packed with relatable moments and marriage-strengthening wisdom....

What happens when the kids leave and it’s just the two of you again? Rick and Clancy Denton decided not to survive the empty nest years—but to thrive in them. In this funny, real, and refreshingly honest episode, they share how rediscovering each other brought new laughter, adventure, and connection into their marriage. Whether you’re nearing empty-nest life or already in it, this episode will hel...

In Part 2 of our “How Not to Kill Your Spouse During the Holidays” series, we dive into the messy, funny, and surprisingly hopeful truth about December chaos. From marital meltdowns to mismatched traditions (IHOP Christmas Eve, anyone?), we unpack why the holidays make communication so hard—and how couples can actually thrive instead of barely surviving. Inside this episode: ✨ Why failure is the...

Does the most wonderful time of the year make you want to tie your spouse to a chair? You aren't alone. We love Christmas, but we don’t love the stress, the fatigue, and the arguments that come with it. In Part 1 of this holiday survival series, we’re opening up our personal "December Protocol"—the strategy we developed after one too many holiday meltdowns (and one infamous leaf blower incident)....

We are back with an unscripted episode fresh off a trip to Mexico City. After surviving a brush with a tree during a hot air balloon ride, we sat down with a young woman who had given up on the idea of marriage. It got us thinking about the modern trend of avoiding commitment and why, despite the "rough landings," we believe marriage is still worth fighting for. In this episode, we cover: ✅ The B...

Welcome back to Marriage IQ! We’re making a borehole through boring and striking out stale marriages. In this episode, Dr. Heidi Hastings and Dr. Scott Hastings explore the incredible power of committed love, using the jaw-dropping  $38 billion divorce of Jeff Bezos  as a stunning case study. Scott argues that even amidst immense wealth, virtually every man eventually longs for one woman, one wedd...

In this laugh-out-loud —and think-a-little — conversation, Dr. Heidi and Dr. Scott Hastings sit down again with Dr. Gina Barreca, a world-class intellect who studies humor the way most of us need to use it: to survive life, love, and other people. From bathroom bonding to marriage banter gone wrong, Gina unpacks why laughter is essential in relationships—and how to know when a joke stops being fun...

Why do words—and laughter—matter so much in marriage? In this lively and heartfelt episode of Marriage IQ , Drs. Heidi and Scott Hastings welcome Dr. Gina Barreca —professor, bestselling author, humorist, and truth-teller on women, culture, and relationships. Known for blending sharp wit with deep insight, Dr. Barreca opens up about her Brooklyn roots, how comedy became her survival skill, and why...

We pick up where last week left off—moving from technoference to the bigger beast: social media. From doomscrolling and old-flame DMs to jealousy, comparison, and online “tribes,” Drs. Heidi and Scott Hastings unpack how our digital lives spill into our marriages—for better and for worse. You’ll hear what divorce attorneys are seeing in real life, why phubbing (phone-snubbing your partner) cuts de...

A true confession kicks this episode off: we accidentally lost half our date night to our phones. That slip becomes today’s lesson on technoference (little device interruptions) and phubbing (phone-snubbing your partner)—and why even “just a second” can quietly lower connection, satisfaction, and trust. We break down the brain science (hello, dopamine loop), the common bias that makes your scrolli...

What happens when your best intentions collide with your partner’s expectations? In this real, unscripted Marriage IQ episode, Drs. Scott and Heidi Hastings unpack how miscommunication and emotional reactivity can derail even the best marriage moments—from heartfelt conversations to romantic retreats. They share a recent story of how cloudy weather, unspoken needs, and one vulnerable moment turned...

What do spies and spouses have in common? In this episode of Marriage IQ, we sit down with Jeremy Hurewitz — former foreign correspondent turned corporate intelligence specialist and author of Sell Like a Spy — to talk about what high-level spy skills can teach us about marriage. You’ll learn: ✅How to get honest answers from your partner without starting a fight ✅The FBI-inspired way to calm an...

Drs. Scott & Heidi Hastings unveil the Ultimate Marriage IQ Date Idea Collection—organized by season, budget, and connection level so you can pick the right date for right now. From everyday, low-cost adventures to cozy winter rituals, spring renewals, summer spontaneity, and fall reflections, you’ll get plug-and-play ideas across the Four Cornerstones: Identity, Intentionality, Insight, and I...

Date night isn’t a luxury—it’s maintenance for a scintillating marriage. In this playful episode, Drs. Scott & Heidi Hastings pull back the curtain on 30 years of Friday nights: what’s worked, what hasn’t, and why consistent dates keep you out of “roommate mode.” You’ll hear their first-kiss story (fireworks were involved), the budget hacks they used in med school, and a stack of Marriage IQ i...

Why do so many men struggle to express emotion—and what happens to marriages when they do? In this compelling episode of Marriage IQ, Drs. Heidi and Scott Hastings sit down with psychologist Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst, whose groundbreaking work on the emotional development of men and boys reveals surprising truths. From toddler tears to marital tension, Dr. Vanderhorst explains how boys are taught ear...