Honestly Smartless

Seven bags of hidden dog treats. A dining room chair wedged under the bedroom door. A half-hour sensual dog massage that accomplished absolutely nothing. Just a normal week in Chelsea's house. Chelsea and Dr. Lindsay get into the full chaos of living with someone you don't trust. Secret treat stashes, the supplements that never get given, the "did you take your meds today" text...

She said "I do"… and then found his cheating texts.  Chelsea and Dr. Lindsay break down a real-life wedding that turned into a same-week divorce, have shiting your pants stories, and Chelsea has a personal connection the the FLDS and Warren Jeffs.  Plus, parents sending a 3-page inheritance list, why red light therapy is a scam, smuggling mushroom capsules to Vegas, and Lindsay is being...

Masters 2026, golf villains, $6 beers & the challenge of going analogue at the Masters. Chelsea and Dr. Lindsay sit down with Josh Decker, host of the Off the Deck Podcast, for a crash course on everything Masters week. Josh breaks down why Augusta National is unlike any sporting event on the planet, who the good guys and bad guys are on tour (yes, golf has villains), what's actually on t...

A listener went on a first date, had a great time, and got a wedgie at the end of the night. We told her to go on the second date.  We break down the TikTok algorithm and why female comedy podcasters can't catch a break, the Instagram influencer charging $5.99 to analyze your face shape (Lindsay's an iron, obviously), and Clavicular telling men to smoke crystal meth for more energy. Plus...

We are in ranting mood, and no one is marked safe. Chelsea also makes her triumphant return to ballet after 35 years, heals some childhood trauma along the way, and learns that pickleball and ballet have absolutely nothing in common.  Tiger Woods' latest DUI, officially crowning him Black Jesus, and we wonder how many more lives this man actually has.  Plus: an Autistic murder documentary, a...

Taylor Frankie Paul was supposed to be the Bachelorette. Then her baby daddy released a two-year-old video to TMZ right before premiere and blew up her life, her career, and apparently the entire Bachelor franchise with it.  We talk about why Dakota is the villain nobody's holding accountable, why the internet keeps punishing the woman, and why ABC might actually be the most culpable party in...

Full story of the guy with no car, wears sweatpants at 2:00 pm, has one Bass Pro Shop hat, and a suspicious lack of personal details. Chelsea let's her besties send the text to end it all. Red pill manosphere men are making money by degrading women who give them clout, so Lindsay and Chelsea defend Only Fans, because they are real people too. And bachelorette t-shirt nightmares and becoming p...

474 days. Three nights. One cashmere blazer. Zero regrets. Lindsay dared the universe to cancel her, and it was terrifying.  Finance bros own 6.7 vests, Aaron Rodgers stays jacked specifically so his wife wants to f--- him, and a Netflix show is making light of men in power taking advantage of young women. New episodes every week. Follow @honestlysmartless on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Suppor...

Chelsea went on a second date four years ago and left after ten minutes because the man answered the door in house slippers and champion shorts.  He's now reappeared three times, and this week he listened to the episode about himself, remembered everything we said, and cancelled Friday. Also this week: Chelsea is convinced Jim Carrey has been cloned and replaced by a Hollywood operative. Lind...

Ellen the cannibal, edibles make Chelsea mouthy, and your friend is a dirty, ugly, trash slut. Send us a text Support the show Like, subscribe, and share with that one friend who needs a reason to laugh. Find us @honestlysmartless on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Connect with Honestly Smartless honestlysmartless.com IG: @honestlysmartless TikTok: @honestlysmartless Chelsea's IG: @chelsea_tu...

Spit or swallow? Eating babies, falling out of love, and get your butts checked. Send us a text Support the show Like, subscribe, and share with that one friend who needs a reason to laugh. Find us @honestlysmartless on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Connect with Honestly Smartless honestlysmartless.com IG: @honestlysmartless TikTok: @honestlysmartless Chelsea's IG: @chelsea_turano Lindsay&a...

RIGGS!!!! Recapping our master manifesting skills, WM Sausage Fest, hot golfers and Savannah Guthrie's mommy. Send us a text Support the show Like, subscribe, and share with that one friend who needs a reason to laugh. Find us @honestlysmartless on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Connect with Honestly Smartless honestlysmartless.com IG: @honestlysmartless TikTok: @honestlysmartless Chelsea&ap...

Udders or mattress actress? Silent throuple retreat, learning what "scooping" is, and Paris Hilton is going to save the world. Send us a text Support the show Like, subscribe, and share with that one friend who needs a reason to laugh. Find us @honestlysmartless on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Connect with Honestly Smartless honestlysmartless.com IG: @honestlysmartless TikTok: @honest...

What is Bubbles up to? Chelsea's booty gains, Lindsay can't get Botox to save her life, and which side of the Beckham drama are you on? Send us a text Support the show Like, subscribe, and share with that one friend who needs a reason to laugh. Find us @honestlysmartless on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Connect with Honestly Smartless honestlysmartless.com IG: @honestlysmartless TikTok...

Happy birthday Chelsea! We are taking this show on the road, 2016 is back, and the Autism Barbie hits a little too close to home. Send us a text Support the show Like, subscribe, and share with that one friend who needs a reason to laugh. Find us @honestlysmartless on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Connect with Honestly Smartless honestlysmartless.com IG: @honestlysmartless TikTok: @honestlysmart...

Only Fans $6,000 course for free (you're welcome), Tom Brady should count his blessing for being seen with Alix Earle, gold bars in big books, and are we bad people? Send us a text Support the show Like, subscribe, and share with that one friend who needs a reason to laugh. Find us @honestlysmartless on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Connect with Honestly Smartless honestlysmartless.com IG:...

Farkakte ozempic, pimping out pay pigs, Rockefeller/Kellogg conspiracy theory, and daddy issues. Send us a text Support the show Like, subscribe, and share with that one friend who needs a reason to laugh. Find us @honestlysmartless on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Connect with Honestly Smartless honestlysmartless.com IG: @honestlysmartless TikTok: @honestlysmartless Chelsea's IG: @chelsea_...

Justin Timberlake, pickleball, Ozempic, Barstool, getting an agent and more highlights of 2025. Send us a text Support the show Like, subscribe, and share with that one friend who needs a reason to laugh. Find us @honestlysmartless on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Connect with Honestly Smartless honestlysmartless.com IG: @honestlysmartless TikTok: @honestlysmartless Chelsea's IG: @chelsea_t...

Why can't Chelsea's dog just be gay? Kamala recap for Barstool Sports,  and Taylor Swift is really onto something. Send us a text Support the show Like, subscribe, and share with that one friend who needs a reason to laugh. Find us @honestlysmartless on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Connect with Honestly Smartless honestlysmartless.com IG: @honestlysmartless TikTok: @honestlysmartless...

Michigan's coach plan b failure, Alicia Silverstone's acting lips, Joe Burrow's swords and bringing awareness to hot tub sex trafficking. Send us a text Support the show Like, subscribe, and share with that one friend who needs a reason to laugh. Find us @honestlysmartless on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Connect with Honestly Smartless honestlysmartless.com IG: @honestlysmartless...

Oprah is rebranding boundaries, the taint is free and on fire, how to grift your way into your boyfriend's life, and we got an agent!! Send us a text Support the show Like, subscribe, and share with that one friend who needs a reason to laugh. Find us @honestlysmartless on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Connect with Honestly Smartless honestlysmartless.com IG: @honestlysmartless TikTok: @hon...

Freaky Friday body swap, Thanksgiving fails, Meghan Markle and pedicure dates. Send us a text Support the show Like, subscribe, and share with that one friend who needs a reason to laugh. Find us @honestlysmartless on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Connect with Honestly Smartless honestlysmartless.com IG: @honestlysmartless TikTok: @honestlysmartless Chelsea's IG: @chelsea_turano Lindsay&apo...

An agent reached out to us!!!! Chelsea's ChatGPT is in love with her, Lindsay is joining a chanting cult, Turkey hair transplants and George Washington is hotter than Ben Franklin?? Send us a text Support the show Like, subscribe, and share with that one friend who needs a reason to laugh. Find us @honestlysmartless on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube. Connect with Honestly Smartless honestlysm...

Filler or facelift? Skinny schoolgirls fresh air photoshoot, LED boob jobs and vagina lollypops.  Bits and Clips 00:00 Skinny schoolgirl photoshoot 03:23 Ben Franklin Fan Club 08:20 Would you rather? Filler or facelift? 21:10 Trying to be ladies 27:49 Eating disorders are becoming contagious 30:33 Vagina lollypops 37:39 Trying out a new personality  Send us a text Support the show Like, subscribe,...

My mom is having an affair with my ex-husband?? BINGO was his name-o. Hoarding hits too close to home and more. Bits and Clips 00:00 F*** you brad 02:21 Friends tell friends they are on speakerphone  04:58 Fans in the wild 06:21 My mom is having an affair with my ex 09:08 Why aren't we famous yet? 14:26 Hoarding husbands 17:30 Meghan Markle is more hated than P. Diddy?? 22:41 Throw your sh*t...