F*ckShakespeare

Drunk Shakespeare. Hard cider and a drink called a blueberry bramble. Questions about my kingdom for a horse. Some Welsh history. Snorts. Giggles. And some darn fine drunk reading.

In which Diana begins to sing from West Side Story, DIANA has a soapbox (!!!!!), Erin dissects a line, the King is NOT being served, and Richard and Richmond have some spectral visitors.

Brush up your Shakespeare, start learning him now... Richard is starting to LOSE it. Why is Derby Derby now? Here an Elizabeth, there an Elizabeth. The Rat and The Cat are back. And a whole bunch of messengers - one with a black eye and a fat purse.

Oh Ladies, Oh Richard, Oh Elizabeth. So much wailing, so much banter, so much telling of things that are meant to persuade. And a reference to Singing in the Rain because what would Fuck Shakespeare be without some kind of musical SOMETHING?

What begins as a lovely visit to two sweet boys turns into that darn Duchess of York and Queen Elizabeth one-upping each other AGAIN. Richard ascends. He and Buckingham have some awkward moments. And the plot thickens...

What makes a bastard anyway? My nephew would say it's someone who cuts my mother off in her car. Richard sets up all the dominos. Buckingham and Richard put on quite a show. But the academy award goes to RICHARD! In case you want further details about this wacky family, here is one take (with a family tree for reference): https://www.superflumina.org/king-richardiii-rise-house-tudor.html

What do the Everly Brothers, Donald Trump, Richard 3, and strawberries have in common?

In which brothers are reunited, uncles are teased, asides are made, intents are misinterpreted, and Diana and I talk about food that isn't food.

In which Willie lets us know how the groundlings view the shenanigans of the ass-cushions. 3 differing opinions are offered. Next, we meet young Richard of York. Whippersnapper. And the Duchess continues to be a dick about Dick.

Did you know there was an ice age that ended as recently as 1850? I had no f*ckin' idea! (This is Diana going rogue, btw) In this wildcard episode I tell you about a series of events in England during Shakespeare's time called the Frost Faires. They were how the Early Modern people (Shakespeare's peeps) made the most of their own climate disasters. My classmates and I set up a present...

In which Boy and Girl make their stage debut, mourning becomes a competition, the Dutchess talks about her tits, and Buckingham inadvertently gives Tricky Dicky a way to get his plan underway.

Forcing people to play nice rarely works, just ask King Edward. Richard is a great actor and Edward sounds like an owl. Why? Because, Erin and Diana tie Richard III to The Sound of Music. That's why.

A pagan dream that should have been a warning. Conversation about status, and honor, and morals, OH MY. 2 murderers, who may or may not be villains, pay a visit. What is a malmsey butt? And how does George, Duke of Clarence, end up in relation to one? And a 'word cloud' from Erin (or perhaps a flailing around with concepts that scratched the brain but never fully formed).

In which we meet a bunch of the gang. Infighting. Curses. Lying. And Crying. Queen Margaret is a BADASS and the rest of those fools should listen up. How do the Brady Bunch and The Sneetches relate to Richard III? You'll just have to have a listen.

What does Ferdinand the Bull have to do with The Tragedy of Richard the Third? Erin tells you all about it in this episode full of witty repartee, sexual inuendo, remarkable changes, a very odd wooing, and burying someone upside down. What happens when someone discovers their power?

AAAAAAND... They're off! The War of the Roses, Lancasters/Lanisters and Yorks/Starks, Machiavelli, Hag and Dutchess - Queen and Lady, Animal Names, Burial in a Parking Lot and much, much more. Now is the winter of our discontent made glorious summer by this sun of York.

The Dubious Conclusion. All the rancidity exposed. The Duke is a dookey. Mariana is on her knees (she might end up frozen solid like that). Isabella joins her on HER knees. Angelo is prepared for death. Reprieve. Objection! Lucio is hoisted on his own petard (that's from Hamlet). All is forgiven and the Duke is just gross (but Isabella is kinda gross too). What did anyone learn? What will Vien...

The Duke plots and plans. The ladies follow directions. Some friar named Penis gets involved and we are off to the races! A few short scenes and the intro to the whopper at the end.

Pompey meets some old friends. We meet Barnardine (Not today Satan). A pirate saves the day. The Duke continues his dooky-ness. And Lucio can't keep his mouth shut. Also... Erin desperately tries to make our two different recording spaces and levels and all the stuff I don't understand sound more in line. It just sounds muddy but...sorry!!!

Meet Marianna of the moated grange. She's the key to the bed-trick plan that will seal Angelo's fate. Or will it? In the second scene the Duke finds out that his little schemes ain't working quite as well as he had hoped they would. Because, you know, HUMANS! They don't behave according to prescription. That's what makes them fun.

The Duke/Friar meets the populace and sees that his little experiment ain't going so well. He also hears some interesting things about himself. Then he has a magic speech (we discuss the form of it if you're interested) and casts a spell for the conclusion of his fuckery. How will it go? Stay tuned.

Brothers and sisters with their obscure nuances, eh? Act 3: Sc 1 is the crux of the play where we get to really see what it's all about. Or do we? Some kind of trauma happened back there in the dark and dirty past in this family. The word 'incest' is not one that you can ignore or ascribe some other meaning to. Hear what we think and let us know what YOU think is going on there.

Get ready for Isabella v. Angelo Part 2! This time there are no witnesses, and you know that won't go well... It's a deadly and sexy game they're playing. Will there be any winners?

“The very roles of nun and judge have deep roots in classical pornography... " Listen as Isabella and Angelo go toe-to-toe in their exciting first meeting. It's a sexy power struggle and we'll map out the blow by blow... so to speak. You better believe Angelo's thinking about that.

Enter the comic relief! Meet Constable Elbow and his crew of malefactors. He's one of the reasons justice doesn't really get done properly in Vienna even though he keeps trying. Also we learned some new Elizabethan slang - stewed prunes = nutsack. You're welcome.