Cringevangelical

A follow up to last week's episode where we get into the nitty gritty of what really went wrong at CSU. Also, can I say King Gizzard and the Wizard Lizard five times fast? Did this college for reals have a 10:30pm curfew? How bad can life get for women? Do you really need a degree to teach college courses or can prayer help you fake it? This and more in a rather scathing episode of Cringevangelica...

My greatest enemy has fallen. That's it. What a way to to start off the second season am I right? TW/CW: -Mentions of CSA -Mentions of SA -Mentions of homophobia -Abuse of power -Misogyny -Religious Abuse Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's the big finale for Jimmy and his marriage course from Hell! Get ready for USDA certified bullshit as we discuss how to affair proof your marriage. Jimmy brings the tough love by telling us we don't deserve happiness but we do deserve a fire D, as long as that D is honored properly prior and also we pray over said D before we use it. Also a little post script on Sailor Moon and the Christian r...

Did you know that your sex is monitored by our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ? Well, according to Jim Jam Jimboree and his wife Karen, Jesus is in the room while you bone, and he likes it! Also, how is Sailor Moon radicalizing Islam? Will God be mad if my wife doesn't cum? Do men do emotions? How about oral? Can cleaning the house take me straight to pound town? These questions no one ever wanted an...

This is exactly what you think it is, my coming out story! Just one hour of me yapping about how I figured out I was queer af. This content will include spoilers for the Magnus Archives, me thinking A03 was just a fanpage for the Magnus Archives, the confusion I felt when I went on A03 and it was not just fanfiction about the Magnus Archives, valuable lore surrounding my Monster Pig fanfiction and...

I start my indestructible marriages course and it is so boring I get sidetracked and find "The Gathering" a British men's retreat like no other! Get ready for weird marriage tips interspersed with testosterone laced fun in this multinational episode of Cringevangelical! TW/CW: -Colonialism -Homophobia -Transphobia -Mentions of divorce -Mentions of sexual intimacy -Discussions of verbal and emotion...

Oh, you thought we were done being problematic in a British accent? Well, you are wrong because British evangelicals are JUST as political as American evangelicals all in the name of *drum roll* BEING TRANSPHOBIC! That's right, get your paper and pens out, it's time for random British men to teach us how to writer homophobic letters to parliament and for some reason go absolutely ballistic over Sc...

On today's godly episode, we travel across the pond to see what is the state of affairs for British evangelicals. Listen as I, your fearless (and American, please be gentle, I am American) host as I dive into the misconceptions us ex-fundie kids have about the UK and the continent of Europe in general. This episode includes: me just saying "England" when I mean the UK and then catching myself and...

Guys, the Christian marriage app has anatomy graphics for people who are married and have had *the sex*. I am talking basic graphs we got in health class. It's just that like it's news for PEOPLE WHO HAVE HAD SEX! That's it. That's the episode. Just forty minutes of me coping with this knowledge. TW/CW: -mentions of pornography -purity culture -descriptions of sexual activity -mentions of riding a...

Wow wow wow, where to begin? Folks, we have a Christian marriage sex app that is breaking down how oral sex is okay now! Thanks Bethany Beal for making sure I know all about it! I give the history of old Bortles Beal and her reign of sexual....whatever is going on. Also, what if we renamed sex positions so they were more godly? Sex toys in the Christian tradition exist but masturbation is forbidde...

What if The Magnus Archives' favorite murderous pig got seriously into it with Black Phillip, saucy and sinister goat from The VVitch? Well, you are in luck because sometimes you have to be your own hero and write stupid fanfiction about murderous barnyard animals goring the shit out of each other. Please take a listen if you want to add objectively dumb writing into your life. TW/CW -Violence -An...

Ahoy maties! Let's sail the seas for God in this swashbuckling episode of Cringevangelical. What would you do if your left eye was removed at an objectively young age rendering you partially blind and with a huge eye patch? Start a ministry where you call yourself a Christian Pirate and write a bunch of pirate songs about God for kids, OF COURSE! Take a listen as we dive into Christian piracy in t...

Uh oh, looks like the atheists are at it again and making me include people that aren't me in greetings! Also, can the atheist bro culture just stop, I go on a rant about everyone's favorite criminal, I mean mayor, Byron Brown, and is Santa robbing Jesus' well deserved glory? All of this and more in this holly jolly episode of Cringevangelical. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more infor...

Girls, is it sin to have a normal bodily reaction? Should you kiss before marriage? How about a nice backrub, that okay? What are the red flags in men? Do I have to be physically attracted to my partner? Am I respecting my husband as a transactional act to get any form of affection from him? These questions no one asks unless they are a sexually confused evangelical girl and so much more on my min...

Girlies, is it gay for your husband to respect and love you? We are looking over what we will be learning as good Christian wives and husbands. Also, am I a virtuous woman? What is Critical Grace Theory? Will there be oral sex in heaven? All these questions and more are answered very insufficiently in this episode of Cringvevangelical. CW/TW Purity Culture Slut-shaming Swearing Sexual content Ment...

What could bring Shrek, Paul Blart, Mr. Darcy, and J.K. Rowling together? Well this fanfiction of course! A little Halloween bonus for y'all. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What if your horror movies are causing a demonic influence on your home? Also, what makes a horror movie Christian, can you get rid of your demonic friends through Jesus' name, and when will Alanna ever stop rambling!? This and more on this spooky episode. TW/CW -Abortion -Demonic possession -Child abuse (not described) -Mental Illness -Medical Issues not being taken seriously -Mental Illness seen...

Halloween doesn't need to be a time of darkness and death, it can also be a time of darkness and death as long as that darkness and death happened within the many pages of the Bible. What wouldn't the little kiddies like more than passing out Bible tracts dressed up as David and Goliath while worship songs about victory over death are playing in the background? Plus what if instead of bobbing for...

Happy Banned Books Week! Let's take a little gander at how Evangelicals love a good book banning and this rando who went to Barnes and Noble to read a bunch of young adult literature (without paying) to tell us all how it's evil! TW/CW: -Book banning -Government sponsored censorship -Misogyny -Racism -Transphobia -Homophobia -Queerphobia -JK R*wling -Negative discussion of satanism -Negative comme...

Have you ever listened to worship music and thought "why is this so horny?" Well you are in luck, because I also think the same exact thing. Also, what's more casual and normal than making kids sing about eternal damnation being imminent and why exactly did "You Spin Me Right Round (Like a Record)" get a Christian cover on this musical edition of Cringevangelical. TW/CW: Homophobia Negative views...

The thrilling sequel to Daniel's smiting experience, Dragonball is causing us to *lust* and the many tenets of the Church of Goku. TW/CW: Xenophobia Anti-Asian racism Check out my tumblr @hippeasantwitch and my instagram @cringevangelical_pod Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The spooky season is upon us. Get on into it with Gi and Alanna as we discuss the important things in life, like should Vincent Price have done drag and what if a haunted house was Christian in this Cringevangelical Halloween special (as well as our first Cringevangelical punishment). TW/CW: Discussion of periods Purity culture Mention of abortion Mention of medical emergency Sexual content (eroti...

Voldemort arrives to campus with his heathen agenda and a ruthless Reddit account! TW/CW: Forced evangelism Derogatory discussion of atheists Mentions of addiction (non descriptive) Gaslighting Manipulation Misuse of authority Misogyny Discussions of sex and purity (some non direct) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's just like Dungeons and Dragons kids! Except you memorize Bible verses, you get random, unwanted, spiritual guidance, and you can convert NPCs to the one true faith: Evangelical Christianity! Hand in your divining spells for discerning prayer in this (only slightly alarming) episode! TW/CW: Fatphobia (PLEASE take seriously) Body shaming Forced evangelizing Manipulative language Public humiliat...

Harry and Draco finally face off in the penultimate episode of Hogwarts School of Prayers and Miracles. TW/CW: Misogyny Manipulation Anti-Catholic narrative Forced conversion Patriarchal themes Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.