The Susan Winter Show

Alika writes, “Hey Susan, I'm a big fan of yours! My question is about taking chances. Is it a good idea to "shoot your shot" as Millennial's often say? I find myself wanting to interact with people I see at school or the gym, or even messaging them on social media, but I don't have the guts for it. Even further, I can't tell if I'm being reasonable talking myself down, or if that feeling is actua...

Are you tired of watching videos and reading articles about narcissists? Perhaps you're taking the right approach but applying it to the wrong person. Instead of trying to change the narcissist, why not change your attitude about them? This is the one thing they desperately need from you, and the only thing over which you have complete control.

Just when you thought you'd handled your heartache, it comes raging to the surface. A delayed response to a painful event or situation can put us into a tailspin. Here's how to handle that emotional onslaught and move through the process of healing.

Dominik writes, “Hi Susan, I‘ve watched all of your videos and they are so helpful, thank you! Before I found you, I used to follow coaches that said things like “Don't give compliments, otherwise it will make you look anxious, ” etc., but after I found you I realized that with those rules one cannot find love. One can only find love if he shows up. But what do you do if you show up but the other...

Do you feel like you're losing faith in finding love? Here's the good news. Celebrities are leading the new trend towards commitment by pulling the trigger on engagement. What does that mean for you? That the hookup culture is becoming passé as partnership gains momentum.

The first phase of any growth process is the realization that a change must be made. That's a good thing. While recalibrating to our new and improved selves, we can temporarily look worse (even though we're getting better). Here's how to handle this uncomfortable transition while dating and mating.

Some partners need to create a false reality in their minds so that they can play the victim. By repeating and embellishing ‘alternative facts,' you're always at fault. Here's the best way to stop this dating game, and your need to defend yourself against false accusations.

Joey writes, “Dear Susan, thanks — the way you advocate authenticity is so refreshing. You've talked about people having you in reserve/place card, and how you should get up and move on. My question is what is the best way to do this? How much of a conversation should there be? I've been seeing a guy I really like for a while and would like more but I feel that I'm stuck as an option not a priorit...

Debbie writes, “Could you perhaps do a video on how to handle it when your partner doesn't give you the attention you need, whether it's at the start of a new relationship or in a longer-term relationship. I.e. how do you speak to them about it without seeming clingy and how do you handle your own emotions of needing that much attention from them. Thank you.”

R Baker writes, “Brilliant video, and Nikka was an adorable addition. Can't wait to see the ‘why did you pick someone who was so difficult?' video, Susan! I've realised that, age 40, if all my boyfriends have been disappointments then the basic common denominator is me. Not them. I really want to change who I gravitate towards. Pretty much guaranteed - if I find myself liking someone, I reckon I s...

Viewer Katia writes, “Hi Susan, I love your videos! You are helping me to find my true self and heal after a breakup. My question is about tolerating differences in a relationship. How do you know when something is a deal breaker versus something that you should compromise on? I'm not sure if I was focusing on the bad or if that one trait was intolerable for me. Thank you!”

Laura writes, “Your videos are true pearls of wisdom. Could you talk about sensible, practical tips for ladies to avoid or handle persistent or unwanted attention?  Any red flags you have experienced and how to deal with pushiness etc. Much love, Laura”

You may be savvy on decoding hot and cold patterns in dating, but narcissists play a whole different game. Learn how to insulate your heart from needless pain and avoid the emotional tension by being one step ahead of your narcissist.

Your partner's the one who urged you to move ahead in your relationship. Now, they're the one who's backed away. Why? Here's what happened and here are your options.

Amber writes, “Hi Susan, What do you think about contacting an ex to call them out for being cruel upon breaking up? To get some things off my chest after about a month of no contact and since it's become obvi he's back together with his ex (he tried to play it off like he'd met someone new and told me I just "didn't have it"). I know this isn't true, but it keeps ringing in my ears and I'm still...

Viewer Ger R writes, “Hi Susan. Please do a video about bringing up the topic of being exclusive. How long before wanting this is reasonable? And, with that conversation, I would think that removing our profiles is appropriate to be part of the discussion. I can understand not dismantling it but it can be kept off of circulation. If your partner never asks to be exclusive and you feel the relation...

Heather L writes, “Hi Susan! I am gaining so much value and clarity from your content. It's helping me improve my relationships with other people, and helping me improve my self-esteem. In one of your videos, you discuss a client that had an inner dialogue of "If I am really, really good... maybe you will like me back." I find myself falling into this pattern. How can I tip the teeter-totter, as y...

Not sure what's required in order to take your summer fling through to the fall? Here are two solid tips that create the greatest possibility for your partnership to continue through cuffing season and beyond.

Roger writes, “Dear Susan, I am dating a mother of two right now and she is 35 and I am 25. Anyway, she really wants to enjoy life at the moment because she left a relationship of 10 years about 6 months ago. We had sex recently, but she starts to resist it now. I really get the feeling that she starts to get too attached and is afraid of that feeling. I really want a future with her how do I pace...

Christopher writes, ”Hi Susan. I have admired your work here helping others find confidence in relationships. And I do have a question. Is it true to say that most women want rich successful business type man or ones with good prestigious career pathways? Would it be true to say that as a man who has neither of those (not a good job and not running a successful business) does that mean that I may...

Emotional meltdowns can be observed, honored, processed and packaged. Here's to reroute an internal upset in real time so that you can move forward and get back to a positive mindset.

Emmy writes, “I'm 25 and have gone on many dates with wonderful men. There is attraction, great conversation, but always seems to be something missing. Is it possible to be so happy, independent and comfortable being alone that even if you meet a great guy it will always be stagnant?  I'm emotionally available and fully appreciate the benefits of being in a relationship but am confused by my const...

Furious with your partner? Though you want to lash out in a text message, this isn't the place to start an argument. Learn the amazing power of ‘waiting' to construct the perfect message, and why that choice creates a favorable outcome for you.

Salvatore writes, “Hello Susan, could you explain the psychology or behavior/reasoning behind "haunting"? It's basically the follow up of ghosting. I was ghosted almost a year ago by a girl I went on a date with and she has ignored me up until now, where she popped up watching my Instagram stories. She is currently in a relationship as well. What could this mean?”

You're ready to walk, so why not experiment by enacting 'new ways of being' while you remain with your partner? This is the ‘golden time' to break the negative patterns and try something novel.