Self-Led in Bed: An IFS and Sexuality Podcast

“And then I started to sort of look at things from the snake's point of view, and I could see where it was coming from and this immense desire it has to help us, and it wants us really to succeed, and it wants us to have sexuality, it wants us to have spirituality, it wants us to have enlightenment.” - Peter Legard Nielsen Content Advisory: This episode explores sensitive topics related to sex...

“ So instead of talking about the dishes, who didn't take the trash out and how the other person's mad, we talk about sexuality. So just openly talk about what happens when you get in bed, and then we start tracking the protectors. We have protective parts and we have exiles. So, just like with any topic in couples, sexuality involves our protectors and our exiles .” - Nancy Wonder Disclai...

”Either there's a part who is doing some shaming, either internally or externally, or there's a part who is feeling shameful. And those are two different positions to be in.” Martha Sweezey Content Advisory: This episode explores sensitive topics related to sexuality including sexual abuse.  Listener discretion is advised. It’s hard to feel Self-Led in Bed when we are flooded with shame an...

“ Being Self-led means our parts give just enough room that [there is] enough room for me, enough room for you. So often times when I ask my parts to give me a little space, I say, Can you give me just enough space so I'm here too? ” - Seth Kopald Content Advisory: This episode explores sensitive topics related to sexuality.  Listener discretion is advised. What does it really mean to be Self-...

“What happens in OCD systems, most of the time is that managers recruit firefighters. They're going to escalate the alarm until the firefighter fixes the potential of something or remediates what happened.” Disclaimer: This episode explores sensitive topics related to OCD and sexuality. Listener discretion is advised. This episode explores the intersection of OCD and sexuality through an IFS l...

“I think connecting with your work really showed me and helped me to intuit and start to feel into [the truth] that actually pleasure is naturally here…it arises spontaneously many times when parts trust enough and are willing to allow enough space for Self Energy to embody. And that was a big shift for me.” Content Advisory: This episode explores sensitive topics related to sexual trauma and plea...

“ There can be really restrictive managers around food and exercise trying to control someone's body. But their firefighters might not be about food. Their firefighters actually might be around sex or spending or overworking…And when we can really work with these parts and understand the protective nature of what they're doing and really befriend them is when they can show us what they&#39...

“Touch deprivation is a real thing...I think that there's some sensitivity when we're not receiving those hugs and that touch. Your skin is almost craving it." Content Advisory : This episode explores topics related to sexuality, trauma, racism, and societal oppression. In today’s conversation, Deran Young, a licensed therapist, co-author of "You Are Your Best Thing," and fo...

"When we can turn towards our parts with curiosity and compassion, we can begin to heal and grow." In this episode, I talked with Certified IFS Consultant, author and IFS podcaster extraordinaire, Tammy Sollenberger, about how we discovered Internal Family Systems, the transformative power of self-compassion, and how to apply IFS principles in our daily and sexual lives. Tammy shares per...