The Living Truth Podcast - Freedom From Unwanted Sexual Behavior, Hope & Healing For the Betrayed

Dr. Crystal Hollenbeck & Kristin discuss anger after sexual betrayal -- what it actually is, why it shows up the way it does, and what both partners can do with it.   In this episode we cover: A clear definition of betrayal trauma anger and why it is immediate and ongoing, not a one-time reaction Survey findings on self-blame, anger at God, and the physical toll unprocessed anger takes on the...

We often assume our children don't notice what's happening in our marriage during a season of betrayal. Most of the time, they already know more than we think. In this episode with Elia Marcum, certified coach who specializes in walking families through supporting their children and teens through family rupture without placing adult burdens on them. We cover: What kids and teens actually pick up o...

We are inundated with negative, objectifying messaging about our bodies in the church and by our culture. As a result, most of us live disconnected from our bodies. When we struggle with pornography, sex addiction, or experience sexual betrayal , many of us experience even more disconnection from our physical bodies and maybe even a load of shame about this vital part of who we are.   Dr. Dave Jan...

Sometimes when the betrayer reaches for the spouse they betrayed it feels like pressure, not comfort. When she pulls away and he hears that as rejection, it can set off a cycle that pulls both further apart -- him bracing against the fear that he's losing her, her bracing against a nervous system that no longer feels safe near him.   In part one of this podcast series, we talked about why it is a...

You want him close. Then you can't stand to have him near you. You want to fix it. You reach for her — and she disappears. Same day. Sometimes the same hour. That's not confusion or immaturity. It's two nervous systems trying to find safety in a marriage that no longer feels safe — and it's one of the most common, least talked-about dynamics after sexual betrayal. Betrayal doesn't just wound the r...

Whether you're a betrayed partner trying to make sense of the chaos inside you, or a man who can't seem to stop behavior he hates — this episode is for you.   Kristin sits down with Jenna Riemersma, LPC - certified IFS therapist, CSAT supervisor, and bestselling author of Altogether You and her newest book Move Toward — to explore what happens when we stop fighting the parts of ourselves we don't...

You thought leaving would be the hard part. You didn't know the hard part was what comes after.   In part two of her conversation with Sarah McDugal, Kristin goes deeper into what happens when a woman decides to end a destructive marriage — and the patterns she's been living with follow her directly into family court. What she thought would be a place of vindication often becomes one more arena wh...

You didn't go into your marriage looking for this conversation. But if you're here, something brought you. Maybe it's a feeling you can't quite name. Maybe it's a pattern you've been explaining away. Maybe you already know — and you just need someone to say it clearly.   In this episode, Kristin sits down with Sarah McDugal — clarity coach, founder of Freedom Navigator and Wilderness to Wild, and...

What if your relationship with God doesn’t have to feel like a performance review? In this rich conversation, Michael Cary sits down with author and counselor Michael John Cusick — author of Surfing for God and his newest book Sacred Attachment — to explore one of the most liberating ideas in spiritual life: that your connection to God is unbreakable, and you don’t have to earn it. We explore: • W...

What would you do if a relapse happened? For many partners walking through betrayal, that question feels overwhelming—or even terrifying. But avoiding it doesn’t create safety. Preparation does.   In this episode of The Living Truth Podcast, Kristin sits down with betrayal trauma coach Lachelle Burkett to talk about how creating a relapse safety plan can move you from panic to clarity—so you’re no...

If the behavior has stopped… why does the relationship still feel disconnected, fragile, or stuck? In this episode of The Living Truth Podcast, Kristin Cary and Michael Cary explore the often-overlooked gap between sexual sobriety and emotional maturity—and why stopping the behavior is not the same as rebuilding trust, safety, and connection. You’ll gain clarity on: Why sobriety alone doesn’t rest...

What happens when blind, unquestioning obedience is expected — and silence is spiritualized? How does a lack of healthy developmental autonomy impact marriages, families, churches, and women navigating betrayal?   Drawing from developmental psychology and research on spiritual trauma, Kristin and licensed counselor AC Seiple unpack:   How shame forms when autonomy is not nurtured in childhood How...

What if desire isn’t something to manage, suppress, or fix—but something that reveals who you truly are? In this episode of The Living Truth Podcast, Michael Cary sits down with Jay Stringer, therapist, speaker, and author of Unwanted and the brand-new release Desire, to explore the deeper architecture of desire—far beyond sex, behavior, or performance.   We talk about the provisional self—the ver...

Sexuality is one of the most powerful — and most misunderstood — parts of our humanity.   In this deeply honest conversation with Julie Slattery, clinical psychologist, author of Surrendered Sexuality, and co-founder of Authentic Intimacy we explore:   • The cultural lies shaping how we think about sex • Why covenant — not consumption — is at the heart of God’s design for sex. • The devastation of...

When betrayal trauma shatters your world, it’s natural to search desperately for answers. Podcasts, books, courses, social media—there is more information available today than ever before. But is there a point when searching for more information actually keeps us stuck? In this powerful and compassionate conversation, Kristin Cary welcomes Shelley Martinkus, co-founder of Redemptive Living, to exp...

Kristin Cary welcomes Dr. Barbara Steffens, founder and first president of the Association of Partners of Sex Addicts Trauma Specialists (APSATS) and one of the pioneering voices who reframed sexual betrayal as trauma rather than codependency.   Together, Kristin and Dr. Steffens explore how ministry leaders, counselors, and pastors can wisely and compassionately walk with betrayed women and strug...

When your life is shattered by trauma, slowing down can feel impossible—even unsafe. In this tender, soul-nourishing conversation, Kristin reconnects with her friend Anna Christine Seiple, a licensed counselor, trauma survivor, and author of The Sacred Art of Slowing Down. Anna shares her profound story of devastation, healing, and rebuilding a life she never imagined possible.   Together, Kristin...

When betrayal trauma shatters your world, it can feel impossible to imagine anything good emerging from the rubble. In this deeply encouraging conversation, Kristin sits down with Gigi Hopkins, Director of Wives Care at Be Broken Ministries, to explore how the process of healing can lead to expanding your influence, your agency, and your God-given impact on the world around you.   Gigi shares: ✨...

Betrayal shatters your world. It leaves you wondering which way is up, how to survive the devastation, and whether you’ll ever feel whole again. Kristin interviews trauma-informed counselor, coach, and author Tammy Gustafson to talk about her new book, Broken to Brave: Your Courageous Act of Healing After Intimate Betrayal (releasing January 27, 2026).   Tammy shares her four-phase framework for h...

In this quiet space between the holidays—or whenever your heart finally slows down enough to feel—Kristin offers a calming, Christ-centered invitation to breathe again.   If you’re navigating the devastation of sexual betrayal, the shame of unwanted sexual behavior, or the disorienting waves of grief that erupt long after the crisis, this episode will meet you with compassion and truth.   You’ll b...

What does true sobriety look like for those battling sex and pornography addiction—and how does recovery move beyond the addict to bring healing to their partners? In this episode, Michael sits down with Tim Stein, co-author of Finding the Way Through: A Workbook for Sex and Pornography Addiction to explore a new framework for recovery. Together, they unpack the workbook’s definition of sobriety,...

Let's explore the often-overlooked connection between spiritual warfare & mental health. In this episode, Kristin and Dr. Natalie Atwell—counselor, educator, and long-time advocate for trauma survivors— shine light on the unseen battles many believers face, especially those carrying deep childhood wounds, walking through betrayal trauma, or struggling with destructive sexual patterns.   Dr. At...

The holidays can stir up overwhelming waves of grief and confusion. The music, the smells, the traditions — they bring back joyful memories and painful reminders of betrayal, leaving many women asking: “What was ever real?”   Learn how to recognize the power and purpose of your anger, the “bargaining” stage of grief, and create safe space to process painful memories. Know that your grief isn’t a s...

The holidays are supposed to be filled with joy and celebration — but after sexual betrayal, they can feel unbearable. In Part 1 of this special series, Michael interviews Kristin about her raw story of her first holiday season after discovery and the first steps betrayed partners need to survive:  prioritizing safety, stabilization, boundaries, and connection.   If you’re in the early days of bet...

In this episode of the Living Truth Podcast, Kristin sits down with Michael to unpack the Men in the Battle (MIB) Battle Plan — a practical framework for men pursuing lasting freedom from unwanted sexual behavior.   They explore why relationships are the backbone of recovery, how marriage and spiritual connection anchor lasting change, and the role of education, journaling, and mentoring in shapin...