D&D is For Nerds

My whole life, I’ve only know of one profession: Knight of the Cloth. There are Oaths to take. Oaths you should not break, cannot break. I took them before I could grow hair on my chin. The Divine Order taught me many things. Mostly how to fight with a sword and not embarrass myself in front of dignitaries. I can recite 9 different prayers for the morning, tell the difference between most devils a...

The thing about wood from a tree-blight is that it's not regular wood, owing to the fact that it didn't come from a regular tree. It came from an evil tree, therefore, evil wood. And if you build a house out of evil wood, guess what, you've got an evil house, probably full of evil furniture. On top of this there's always the risk, or at least Emmanuel seems to think so, that the tree-blight will t...

To many of us Urwin was a kind face and a gentle heart. Anyone in town could tell you a tale of how he was there with a drink in each hand and a shoulder to grieve on. Tonight we remember Urwin not for grief but to bring him to life together one last time. In life Urwin was like a great stone statue and each of us were given a piece to hold and feel his love and remember when he could not be there...

"... and once the great forges of dwarvkin burn no more the frozen passages and snowkin will once more take Nott this time Lemminkäinen will know no equal as his frost and these shall be known as the end of days. And on these days the children of Hus shall see the end the end of all things but one: even at the end of time Lemminkäinen's wrath will remain." If you're still wanting to pledge for the...

Admiral Cutter, I am pleased to report that while tests are still ongoing we have had incredible initial success. Your tabaxi scientist Crawls-Trough-Walls and the rest of his team believe they are close to isolating whatever element within the Blue Blood that disconnects a subject from the weave and the future. Dr Crawls has demonstrated capabilities of reducing the divinable qualities of a squar...

Y'know, folks like to say Pip is wholly without confidence. That he don't know how to make a decision. In some ways they're right I guess. 'Cept when it's him against a monster. Thats a different Pip altogether. When that crossbows pumpin' and he's making tough calls with teeth on his neck, thats a different Pip. I reckon folks see what I see then, I reckon they see him for real. If you're still w...

Grugrog's Famous Cure. After slaying a rather large beastie that's been terrorising the town, the discerning adventurer would be remiss to not partake in a night of debaucherous revelry! This, in turn, can bring on a head-shattering hangover to slay even the great Tiamat. To get that hangover under control, we recommend a hearty breakfast, and the best hearty breakfast comes from the all-in-one ad...

A vivid conversation strikes out between two former paladins over an evening meal and takes an interesting turn when one quizzes another about their values and worldviews. If you're still wanting to pledge for the Jarren's Outpost Board Game you can right here ! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

"It's just a castle," Pirrin mutters the mantra under his breath while scaling a wall, "living people don't guard ghosts," Pirrin whispers while slitting a knights throat. "Just a normal castle" Pirrin insists moving from shadow to shadow counting the steps between guard patrols. "Hecktor would kill any ghosts if he saw them." Pirrin's breath catches in his throat as a long black cloak glides arou...

/feɪt-less/ ADJ. 1. Having or showing a lack of fate. Having no predetermined destiny. She went through life like a fateless rock tumbling down a hill 2. To act unpredictably or have an immunity to divination. The only thing more shocking than when she pulled the knife was that the court diviner couldn't find the fateless traitor 3. A condition of unknown causation where the subject cannot have th...

Well, hm, looks like this particular corner of the Shadowfell's got itself a mighty big vampire shaped problem. Thats ok. We can get some kind of posse together I'm sure. Hell, just gotta get the right kinda folks. People with training, people with skills, and most important, people who give a damn. Shoot. Wont be the first time I've faced off against some ne'er do well who's too big for his britc...

People don’t realise but the true burden of a Monster Hunter isn’t the detective work, or the ignorant villagers, or even fighting the monster itself. It’s the knowledge. The knowledge of what these monsters are actually capable of, how bad it is, the true consequences of failure. That if you make one mistake, draw the wrong conclusion, pick the wrong entry, people die. That even if you do everyth...

A funny thing about faith is you don’t have to be religious to have it. We are told many things when we are growing up, when we are younger, before we even experience the world. A long list of things to not do, places not to go, people not to trust, words that are forbidden and on and on and on. Don’t go outside with damp hair, you’ll catch a cold. Don’t venture out alone into the woods, you’ll be...

I do not understand how these individuals have survived so long without me. They should be commended. Like when a small child learns to walk. It is something they need to do and should come naturally to ensure its survival. Myself- I was walking almost the moment I was born but I am to understand not everyone is as gifted. There is something to be commended about the Great General Pip Manadarin, e...

Hecktor Alabaster would die doing what he loved, trying to save someone else and never thinking about himself. Hecktor Alabaster was born on a hard stone table at his family's home in Northern Candor, the second child of decently well to do and hardworking parents. He came of a people who had been stonemasons for generations, men and women whose bodies became as hard and unbreakable as the stone t...

It’s more beautiful than I could ever have imagine. First the stars and now this. A glimpse of the moment when I first saw her. I can see I have past by many eyes but I only got lost in hers, and to get lost in those eyes all over again? Maybe this is heaven. Sometimes love is as easy as looking at the moon and sometimes it is as difficult as counting the stars. I knew then, just as I know now, th...

Little dragon man always so confused. He like sapling bending away from sunlight. A sapling with mouth like howler monkey. And no ears. Think he knows everything but he doesn’t know anything. He need to listen. Listen like Smilk. Smilk understand. Smilk gets it. If you're still wanting to pledge for the Jarren's Outpost Board Game you can right here ! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for mor...

Int. Gregory Bone’s Orphanage. Night Written by Pep Mandarin Pep: please don’t go o brother of mine Pip: beloved sister, if it was up to me I would stay with you for eternity and a day, but that mean man Hardcastle has tricked me and I now serve him and his stupid cause Pep: please take me with you! Pip: no, I could not in good conscience put you in danger. I love you too much for a life of hardsh...

Here’s a horse, go track that very fast moving carriage. Why yes, it is indeed strange that all the creepy crawlies of Barovia know not to attack them. Why, isn’t it strange that those same creepy crawlies don’t owe me the same courtesy? Who do they think I am? Assassin Vine? It's just not cricket. Should have said to take me with them, drop me off outside the gates. Don’t worry! I won’t sneak int...

Loud ones make good herald. Voices carry. Strong. Like oak. Didn’t think little dragon man would do that. Only small problem. If need to, should be easy kill. If you're still wanting to pledge for the Jarren's Outpost Board Game you can right here ! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Once again I find myself wanting to help and I am yet again without the tools to do so. Moments ago I was prepared to kill these poor souls and now I'm racking my brain trying to think of ways to aid them. Why can't I let this go? Why must you take in every stray you come across? You have a mission. Kill Strahd. Or stop him. A monumentous and impossible task. But let's say it's achievable, will th...

I do not know why he keeps yelling at me when I bring him back from the brink of dead. It’s not that he is ungrateful, or perhaps he is? I do not think he has a death wish. If that were the case, surely he’d have taken any of the many opportunities that has arisen before now. He seems more displeased at the choice of song, but it is just a spell! If you're still wanting to pledge for the Jarren's...

This one has yet to hear from that one or the other one. Why they so rude? Don't they know this one need to know if they go on perilous journey? If metaphor happen and they don't tell, how will audience understand and know greatest journey has deep meaning? This would be great tragedy.  If you're still wanting to pledge for the Jarren's Outpost Board Game you can right here ! Hosted on Acast....

On the Hunt Must be quick. Druid power grow stronger. Must fight. Must destroy. Must kill. Editor's note: around the 40 minute mark we switched microphones for a session, turns out that wasn't a: great choice. Apologies for the next few eps xx o If you're still wanting to pledge for the Jarren's Outpost Board Game you can right here ! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well Hecktor has gone and left us to fend for ourselves, great, just perfect. Plus everyone hates me, which I suppose isn't that unusual. What was it the monks at the monastery used to say? "Not only are you at your chores young Mandarin, you are also unlikeable in some undefinable way unrelated to the things you say or do." Oh and now we're fighting spiders. Capital. If you're still wanting to pl...