Jake Yapp presents: Not Today, Thank You

Today: Frankie Boyle, Priti Patel, Polar Bears, German Foster Children, Austrian Chairman Emeritusses, Marsupials, Robert Pattinson, Crabs... and Dora Dale. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

How was your weekend? Oh, sorry. Trump's tax returns, Mothere Theresa, and Movie Quotes. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

'Friend' (ok fine, cousin) of the podcast Dave Yapp shares some obscure audio, all tied up in the ethereal world of sleep... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

'Ere. 'Ere! Show us your Kent Access Pass! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Oh my god this morning was like wading through dog muck. But we got it done. Good morning! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Taiwan, Geese annnnnd... Bald Beagle! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The pirañas are circling Boris Johnson. Also, the weekend's anti-mask protests, the Diary of Fraser Nelson, why Paris Hilton is amazing, and ultimate hardcore billionaire philanthropy. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Uh, stuff, like Trump and slavery and Russian planes and Laurence Fox and Tory Bungs and churches and things and such. Ok? BRILLO xxx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Let's set up a new religion. Send me your #NewCommandments. It's @nottodaypod or nottoday at swanburst dot com. But please make sure they're all about making COIN. Mny thx. It's lovely to be back! x Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

These infallible men of Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Good morning! How are you are you alright I MISS YOU OK but I am slowly getting my STUFFS together and can now present the new one Matt Hancock dropped overnight Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello from France. Nearly a fortnight now of hobbling along on phone internet, but TOMORROW I go and get the MAGIC BOX that will make EVERYTHING BETTER. In the meantime, here's an update from France... NORMAL SERVICE COMING VERY SOON NOW XXX Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

An update from France, looking at the flora and fauna, and how to kill it and what bits to keep. Blechhhh Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I am very sorry for mispronouncing Maggie Philbin but it was late. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A quick update from my mad, blundering about not knowing what I'm doing in France... It is going... WELL! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

...the continuing, revolting saga, written by listeners... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Presenting the blood curdling, or at least nausea-inducing novella written entirely by the listeners to this podcast... More tomorrow! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You will never look at aubergines or ladybirds the same way again. Have a good weekend! xxx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Curator and creator of audio weirdness, my cousin Dave Yapp, takes us through the first part of a sexy, sexy mix... Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A short piece about massaging figures. Including mine. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

America's on fire again. :-( Also, that time I nearly purchased a bog in Scotland because DEFINITELY SANE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

YOU CAN'T EVEN SAY BRIATIN ANY MORE MATE sorry, I read through a lot of comments sections this morning and I am not feeling well. Anyway. Enjoy! x Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Featuring your choices of best bits, and SOME NEWS. Thank you for being here. It means a lot xxxx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

...Discussing the Keep Britain Free movement with Brian Colt. Also: Dominic Cummings' Father-in-Law on errrr eugenics. It seems guys with hereditary hair loss just can't get enough of it. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Amazing chicken facts in our final talk with Professor Christine Nicol, plus a new format developed by Harry and Meghan. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.