Zen Pop

On today’s show we discuss Interruption Science, the study of the effects of interruptions on job performance. Not only do interruptions challenge our job performance, but they challenge our parenting skills and our ability to feel calm and happy. We also discuss Lean In Together, an organization that demonstrates that when men lean in for equality, they win, and so does everybody else. We answer...

We speak with Dr. John Duffy the author of The Available Parent – Radical Optimism For Raising Teens and Tweens.  He talks to us about how to minimize conflict and maximize satisfaction in your relationship with your child.  We have a tendency today to over-parent, micro-manage, and under-appreciate our adolescents. Dr. John Duffy’s The Available Parent is a revolutionary approach to t...

Cathy and Todd discuss why boys and men can experience emotional isolation and loneliness due to a lack of meaningful relationships with male friends. The inspiration of the discussion comes from a blog written by Mark Greene titled Why Do We Murder The Beautiful Friendship Of Boys .  They also discuss the movie Whiplash and why it’s a perfect example of teaching from a place of fear and ego. They...

Agression.  British theoretical physicist and cosmologist Stephen Hawking believes that the greatest threat facing us today is our inability to “correct our aggression”. We no longer require the amount of aggression that was useful hundreds of years ago, so it’s time to trust that empathy and compassion can be our new change agents. We also discuss The Four Agreements (specifically Agreement #2 –...

We discuss the book  Mindset: The New Psychology of Success – How We Can Learn to Fulfill Our Potential, specifically the difference between a fixed mindset and a growth mindset by Carol Dweck. Understanding the difference will make an impact on how your relate to yourself and your kids, and it will impact how your kids learn. We also discuss how to help kids trust themselves, how we can help kids...

We speak with Author Annie Burnside about her book “From Role to Soul: 15 Shifts on the Awakening Journey”  From her work with many who have awakened, Annie has learned that what it takes for us to finally quit trying to awaken, and simply awaken, is highly individualized. In her own life, she detected the 15 shifts that occurred within her. Yet, as she spoke with others, it becomes in...

Cathy and Todd discuss the Oscars, specifically all of the amazing speeches and shout-outs for social change. They answer a listener’s question about a son that doesn’t want to be involved in extracurricular activities, and another question about how to parent together with different philosophies. They discuss why it’s important to discuss what we really want for our kids (emotional safety and sel...

We discuss Cindy Crawford’s non-photoshopped picture that went viral and how women were normalized by its authenticity. We also discuss how to see situations from a child’s perspective and why it made sense when our youngest daughter ate a sleeve of Hershey kisses – instead of insisting that our kids listen to us, we can make sure we are listening to them. A listener appreciates how his partner te...

Cathy and Todd talk to Tara Mohr, an expert on women’s leadership and well-being. She is the author of Playing Big: Find Your Voice, Your Mission, Your Message , and she’s the creator of the Playing Big leadership program for women. Cathy first heard Tara Mohr at an Emerging Women conference, and she fell in love with her message and book. Listen as Tara talks about why women get blamed for not pl...

Today we discuss our workshop with Dr. Daniel Siegel , Psychiatrist and Executive Director of the Mindsight Institute, where we learned more about mindfulness and how it can change every aspect of our lives AND our children’s lives. We also talk about our contribution to Kids in the House , a video parenting resource where experts address all of your parenting issues. A listener shares how her par...

Todd and Cathy discuss a blog that offers 5 ways to raise kind children. They also talk about “dementia of the pre-occupied”, not a true diagnosis, but a great description of what it feels like when you begin forgetting why you walked into a room or what you planned to say next. They talk about why the teenage brain is different than ours, how to develop trust when communicating with your kids, an...

Do you ever hear (or say) things like this: Life is hard. Being good at school means you will be good at work. Don’t expect too much, then you won’t be disappointed. You can’t do it that way. Do you ever question whether or not these things are really true? This week Todd and Cathy bust open these so-called “facts” to recognize how these negative belief systems slow us down or keep us stuck. They...

We speak with Darius A. Loghmanee, MD Attending Physician, Sleep Medicine; Assistant Professor of Pediatrics, Northwestern University Feinberg School of Medicine.  We cover all the bases from infants to adults.  Is a sleep routine good, and if so what’s the best way of going about it.  Dr.  Darius shares with us why it’s not okay to tell your child to “go to sleep” and what...

Todd and Cathy discuss why our actions dictate our priorities (a Gandhi quote), and how investigation into our priorities tells us a lot about what we think and believe. They also discuss Rob Bell’s new podcast (The Robcast) and his teaching about why “good can be the detriment of best”. They discuss the most recent country music mash up, and Todd shares his favorite scene from The is 40 when the...

On today’s show Cathy and Todd talk about why connection is essential if we want our children to listen and cooperate. If we are seeking changes in our children’s behavior, we need to we focus our attention on deepening the relationship and creating daily connection. We have to be willing to make consistent deposits in the emotional bank accounts of our loved ones – then we take withdrawls (disapp...

A listener shares how her husband has her back – he tells the kids that he loves them, but he loves their mom the most. We also discuss how negative behavior from your children is a method of communication – instead of yelling or punishing, consider asking questions and offering some attention. This will offer your child what he needs, and you may feel less frustrated. Do you have a short story of...

They sound the same, but there is a distinct difference between detachment (giving up) and non attachment (opening up). If you learn the difference, forgiveness will become easier and you will inevitably experience more love in your life. Do your kids play “Dumb Ways to Die”? It sounds harsh, but it was actually created to prevent train/pedestrian accidents. Todd talks about the science behind spa...

Cathy and Todd talk relationships and discuss and article (link below) from The Atlantic called “Masters of Love”  In the article, it talks about the most current research about “master” and “disaster” partnerships. The biggest take away? If your partner sees a bird and points to it, look at the bird and acknowledge you’ve seen it. This is a metaphor for aspects of your relationship! A...

Today we talk different parenting styles from a blog by Denise Stirk, Malala’s Nobel Peace Prize speech, and Todd shares more money tips. We also talk about why the best choices are made responsibly (rather than just running away or pretending something isn’t happening), and we answer a question about whether sleep training is practical option for a 3 year old. The link to hear a snapshot of Malal...

Why are girls going through puberty early? Cathy and Todd discuss a recent NPR interview with the authors Julianna Deardorff and Louise Greenspan of The New Puberty . The book looks at the percentage of girls who are going through early puberty and the environmental, biological and socioeconomic factors that influence when puberty begins. They also discuss why sexuality is an ongoing communication...

Do you let others grow and expand or do you keep pulling them back down into the pot? When you try to crawl out and try something new, do family/friends/co-workers pull you down or deter you? When you change or grow it can be quite uncomfortable for the people around you. Just like crabs in a pot, we pull back the ones who are crawling out because change can feel risky and unpredictable. We also d...

Todd & Cathy share a marriage challenge where Cathy was able to speak up (not easy), and Todd was able to really listen (also not easy). In couplehood- Can we allow our partner to share their pain without taking it personally? Are we brave enough to ask for what we really want? Instead of preaching to others, can we begin to offer what we want to receive, love instead of fear, and BE the chang...

We talk with Mary Ellen Young & Sandra McDonnell about their book, Elements for Girls: A Fun and Engaging Self-Discovery Project. This book supports preadolescent and teenage girls on their journey of self awareness, and offers them a sense of acceptance and empowerment as they grow. We shared their book with our Be U girls, and have gotten tremendous feedback. Listen as we discuss the challen...

Todd & Cathy discuss the “two wolves” parable and how we can use this when we are teaching our kids. An old Cherokee chief was teaching his grandson about life… “A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy. “It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. “One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resent...

On today’s show we discuss why it’s important to support children’s dreams, and why it’s important to do what you love. We talk about Dave Grohl, Jim Morrison, Billy Corgan, and other famous people who realized their dream regardless of what they were told. Parents can redefine what it means for their children to be successful, and they can focus their energy on acceptance and belonging. This resu...